I Love You....WHAT!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Hope Land
Posts: 666
I Love You....WHAT!
Hi everyone,
Many of you don't really know me, but I have been with SR for 5 years or so now. My husband (EX) is an addict, addicted to crack cocaine. It all started 6 years ago. Truly a devasting time in my life as well as our boys life. My husband and I had a really great friend, we go back as far as when I was 15 and my husband, not my husband at that time was friends with him to. When I got married he was in our wedding party, when he got married myself, my husband and our son were all in his wedding party. His marrige ended before mine, he stayed single, though we all still remained friends. He moved to another city not far only an hour or so away from us, so we would at times go and spend the weekends.
When this all broke out with my husband, he was truly devasted...my husband ran off with a crack prositute and I was taking him back after...he went up onside of me and down the other, asking me where is your self worth at! Manytimes when I was down, he had me down to his place, just kept me busy, but yet looked after me, had dinners cooked, I had to do nothing and yes I had my own bedroom, should I fall asleep on the couch, I awoke with a blanket over me.
As time has passed I survived over the Black Hole, I still go and spend weekends at his place and he comes to town we go out.
This past weekend we are out for dinner and he says I Love You...yes that is what I said...What! I guess if I have to be honest, I kind of knew, plus the thought has crossed my mind as well, but he is such a great friend, it scares me to cross a boundary into a relationship. So much more, what if things went wrong...there goes a blessed friendship.
Rose
Many of you don't really know me, but I have been with SR for 5 years or so now. My husband (EX) is an addict, addicted to crack cocaine. It all started 6 years ago. Truly a devasting time in my life as well as our boys life. My husband and I had a really great friend, we go back as far as when I was 15 and my husband, not my husband at that time was friends with him to. When I got married he was in our wedding party, when he got married myself, my husband and our son were all in his wedding party. His marrige ended before mine, he stayed single, though we all still remained friends. He moved to another city not far only an hour or so away from us, so we would at times go and spend the weekends.
When this all broke out with my husband, he was truly devasted...my husband ran off with a crack prositute and I was taking him back after...he went up onside of me and down the other, asking me where is your self worth at! Manytimes when I was down, he had me down to his place, just kept me busy, but yet looked after me, had dinners cooked, I had to do nothing and yes I had my own bedroom, should I fall asleep on the couch, I awoke with a blanket over me.
As time has passed I survived over the Black Hole, I still go and spend weekends at his place and he comes to town we go out.
This past weekend we are out for dinner and he says I Love You...yes that is what I said...What! I guess if I have to be honest, I kind of knew, plus the thought has crossed my mind as well, but he is such a great friend, it scares me to cross a boundary into a relationship. So much more, what if things went wrong...there goes a blessed friendship.
Rose
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
I think that friendship is an important part of a relationship, Rose, and that it should come before the romance and "love".
If you are afraid of losing the "friend" by taking this relationship further, maybe just take it very slow and let time tell you more. There is no rush, and giving you both time to get used to the thoughts of taking it to a "relationship" level is a good idea, from where I sit.
I am just glad to see you and hear you sounding happy.
If you are afraid of losing the "friend" by taking this relationship further, maybe just take it very slow and let time tell you more. There is no rush, and giving you both time to get used to the thoughts of taking it to a "relationship" level is a good idea, from where I sit.
I am just glad to see you and hear you sounding happy.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 10,944
Ah....love....the determination to do goo for the beloved. Sounds like that's what he does. I'm with Ann on this one. You are in no rush with this man. He has been around for a while and sounds as though he has the character to love without expectations.
One step, one day at a time.
Hugs, HG
One step, one day at a time.
Hugs, HG
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Home of the Ravens-MD
Posts: 1,316
Rose, Sounds so good to hear you enjoying life. IMO friendship should be an important part of a relationship. You have that part down, now just take it slow & discover if you two want it to go any further. No rush.
Hugs,
Chris
Hugs,
Chris
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: To the North
Posts: 1,086
Sounds like you've spent enough time with this friend and gentleman to know you actually like him, like being with him, have things in common, etc. So..... from where I sit, that's a pretty solid foundation to see what can built on it!
Take your time, see what it feels like really letting yourself think about this relationship in a different light - instead of just in the back of your mind once in a while.
(((hugs)))
Take your time, see what it feels like really letting yourself think about this relationship in a different light - instead of just in the back of your mind once in a while.
(((hugs)))
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Marietta, GA
Posts: 1,453
Whatever you decide i'm happy that you have this spark of excitement after being alone for so long. To even have the prospect of love is a wonderful thing. To know that someone loves you is such a gift. Take it slow and enjoy it - you deserve this and you'll know what to do when the time comes.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Hope Land
Posts: 666
Thanks eveyone for your replies...
I think you are all right to take it slow and think about it. We get along so well, I just dont want to lose it.
No Splendra, he was not doing dope with my husband. My husband was doing dope with people I never knew nor cared to know....prostitutes and junkies. There is not one friend we had that have seen or heard from him in 3years. Addicts perfur to associate with addicts.
Rose
I think you are all right to take it slow and think about it. We get along so well, I just dont want to lose it.
No Splendra, he was not doing dope with my husband. My husband was doing dope with people I never knew nor cared to know....prostitutes and junkies. There is not one friend we had that have seen or heard from him in 3years. Addicts perfur to associate with addicts.
Rose
Still Standing
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Here @ SR.
Posts: 3,296
I'm so happy for you Rose. It's about time you got to have this breath of fresh air and hope for love and laughter. A new beginning. That renews our strength and hope.
((((((((((Excited for you HUGS)))))))))
((((((((((Excited for you HUGS)))))))))
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