Was it gutless?
 

The no contact thing. I feel that she won't try to accidentally bump into me, our geographical proximity and the fact that she lives on the island and I off would make it fairly unlikely in a typical day.

I got my haircut today, left my travel mug there, so I turned around went back and got it after I was about 5 minutes away from the place. Stop at the gas station to get cigarettes, it's an island design with pumps and entrances on both sides .

There's a van parked on one side, nothing really registers, didn't get a real good look at it.

Park on the opposite side, get out of the car and take 3 steps towards the door and there she is at the register, without thinking I spun around and got back in my car and sat down, waiting until I saw her pull out and onto the street and drive off.

Sitting in the car waiting for her to leave, felt like a little kid hiding from god-knows-what. And only feeling a little better that my instinctual response was to turn and walk the other way.

What you did was not gutless. I don't know your story but I've pulled in places and recognized a car and just sat too. I had just as much of a right to be there as he did but still, I sat in the car. Sometimes it's just easier.

Hey sailor John, I never see you post often, but I assume that I get the jist of what you are saying......

believe it or not, when I have split it off with the abf, I have done the same thing.

I one day saw him- (from quite a distance comming toward my car/the opposite direction on a street) I put my visor down, sunglasses on, and sunk down somewhere low enough to barely peer over the steering wheel....

For me, it was self preservation- I knew if he saw me, he'd at a minimum, call... and then the flood of emotion would start all over again..... and eventually it did happen, and that is why I am here today.

I think that it is good that you ran and hid......

Better to be safe than sorry...

Take care,
cessy

Kudos to you for this. I can only HOPE that if/when I'm in that close of proximity to "him" that I too shall walk the other way....it's the ONLY way for me.

:c011:

I can't say for sure because I'm not you and can't possibly know all of your motivations...but my guess is "probably not gutless, probably good self-care"....I mean, if you've said "no contact," you've said "no contact" for a reason and, based on my own experience of times when I've had to say "no contact" to someone, my reasons are usually pretty good and VERY BIG...and that means that good self-care depends on my ensuring, isofar as possible, that no contact happens.

freya

If no contact is what you have decided is in your best interest, then occasionally you may find yourself having to detour, turn and walk the other way, or even hiding under the dash of your car. OK, so you weren't on the floor, but in my visual it made it a more interesting sight :)
SJ...whatever it is you need to do, you need to do.
(((Hugs)))

I think your instinct is right on the mark.

You have moved on with your life, no contact is a big part of how you were able to do that.

Trust your instinct...always.

Hugs

SJ, I believe you did what YOU needed to do, for YOU. So I'd say it took guts to walk away.

hugs,
Chris

You protected yourself. That is not gutless, that is good. Hugs, Marle

You did good.

:c011:

John you and I have had serveral talks reguarding your ex, honey I know your still dealing and she in her own way is too......DONT YOU EVER THINK OF WHAT YOU DID WAS RUNNING THOUGH!!!!!! It is still way too new for you and it will take time, remember that song "turn around, every now and then I get a little excited ", it is ok you and her shared something powerful and it doesnt just go away over night.......you did great and one day you WILL be able to walk in and maybe even say hello again, hopefully she won't drive you nuts stalking you the next time you see her............good luck honey and stay strong you have done awsome so far!!!!!!!!!!!!! Remember you did this because you had too for you and always put and keep you first!!!!!!


Love and Hugs,
Pamm

A good run is always better than a bad stand :cool:

Sounds like strength, to me!
Great job!