winnie12

I got a call from rehab and AS is really having a tough time. They said some kid trying to be tough picked a fight with him - not sure all the details but sounds like it was somewhat a b/w thing. He got a busted lip - sounds like he may have just lost his first fight - men and those with boys can probably understand how hard that is on him. My son is just really discouraged - says he's not running but he wants them to call his PO and just take him back to jail. Rehab thinks that he is finally wanting to get his life back together but is confused because many of the kids there dont want to make the changes and that he's being tested. They're watching him closely.

They had me talk to him and he was crying so hard on the phone - just doesnt care about anything and cant find the strength to fight. He says he's not going to run but he doesnt want to be there. It just breaks my heart - he just cant find the strength in himself right now. All i could say to him was that he is in a fight to get his life back right now and he cannot allow someone else to take the power of what happens in his life away from him. If he leaves there it will be worse and he has to remember what got him where he is now and remember how much worse it is now then it was a year ago when he was in easy programs. The next stage he will hit is not somewhere he wants to be.

Please pray my son to find the strength and to find some direction. He needs to find his HP right now because he cant do this alone.

Seren

Oh Winnie, I'm so sorry to hear what a tough time your son is having right now. My prayers are with him and with you. He can do this, I know he can!

Prayers and hugs, HG:praying

Serenity Bound

winnie, so sorry to hear your son is having such difficulty. Sending prayers of support to both of you.

Hugs,
Chris

Ann

Winnie, it is not unusual at all for people new to rehab to want out after a couple of days or a week. Their emotions are all over the place, partly because they are still going through withdrawals and partly because they are clean and dealing with their emotions straight on, something they are not used to.

Let the rehab handle this, if your son says he is not going to run, then it WILL get better for him as he learns to live life on life's terms.

I know this is hard for you, and my prayers go out that he stays where he is and gets the help he so badly needs.

Hugs

grateful2b

oh ((winnie)), that has got to be so very difficult for you both...I pray for strength and serenity for you and your son, and that his HP will see him through this very rough and challenging time...big Mom hugs...grateful

cmc

Praying that his HP will keep watch for his safety and that your son will 'use' this recent event as motivation to stay the course and live a life of recovery.
Prayers also for you too winnie, because as a mom I know how hard this can be.
((((winnie))))

katie53

I,m so sorry that you both are in pain. I will send prayers your way.

Shygirl

praying for you and your son!

Callie

Winnie, I'm so sorry. I would do everything to keep him @ rehab. AH is 21 days into his right now and his attitude is really changing during the last 3-4 days. He too was very hopeless during the first few weeks. Nasty attitude etc. It seems the fog is lifting for AH a bit.

Every day that he spends in there with trained counselors is better than jail. Hugs and prayers for you and AS.

shockozulu

Praying for you and your son. From experience with my own addiction, I can tell you that the first ninety days my emotions were all over the place. Sending healing thoughts your way as well.

sleepygoat

Prayers being sent; that he stays, that he finds what he needs both there and where ever he goes to next. I pray God guides him in his recovery and keeps him on the path.

Chino

You both have my prayers.

What happened to him speaks to me and I want to explore it a little bit. Him wanting to go back to jail tells me he feels safer there. The whole rehab process asks residents to acknowledge and allow their vulnerabilities and, then when he gives it, he's victimized. Now it's up to rehab to help him move past that, and I hope they're up to the task. Where's the other boy? I hope he was kicked out for your son's safety and others.

I studied martial arts for many years and the fighter in me wants to teach him how to defend himself.

Maggiemac

Prayers for you and your son. God Bless you both.

Your friend
Maggiemac

winnie12

They cant really say too much to me when it comes to the other kid - they're minors, privacy laws and all of that but they made it pretty clear that it was the other kid having a bad attitude about recovery which started it all. All they said is they were figuring out what to do with the other kid. They typically give them a couple of chances since they are teenagers full of hormones, rage, and addictions - realistically even with well-behaved teenage boys you're going to see a fight break out now and then. I suspect they'll put him on probation and if he does it again he'll be out.

I dont worry too much about my son being able to defend himself. He's a very pysically strong kid and has held his own in jail - we all meet someone that can kick our but here and there - it was just his time. My son just has to learn to deal with his emotions in a healthy way if he is going to get past this.

It was odd but the rehab almost sounded like to them it was a breakthrough -that he's trying and being tested and that he is letting out his feelings emotionally. They just want him to give this a chance.

Thanks to all who have been there - I know the first few weeks have to be the hardest - he's just put on such a happy face the few times I visited - its just a reminder to me that i never really know what's going on inside of him.

Serenity Bound

It was odd but the rehab almost sounded like to them it was a breakthrough -that he's trying and being tested and that he is letting out his feelings emotionally. They just want him to give this a chance.
quote]



IMO, he is certainly in a good place to have those emotions break through. Lot's of support & counseling.

Hugs,
Chris

Abundance

Winnie.... thinking of you and your son.

When my guy was in rehab - every day or two was a different. I never knew quite what to expect. Because of all the emotions being so high... and emotion is my language - I was like a ping pong.

Proud of you and your son's relationship to be able to communicate....

marle

Prayers for you and your son. Early recovery is a very tough place to be. Hugs, Marle

Chino

It bothers me that they didn't give the other boy the boot right away. At the place my daughter went, they had a zero tolerance policy in the adolescent facility, too. I remember the sheriff coming one time to take a girl to juvie because she shoved another girl.

That is good and how funny I overlooked it! I was so caught up in the fight or flight response I didn't see the forest for the trees.

itisatruth

Sending good thoughts for you and your son.....I've seen the emotions coming out like this too and in AH's case, he felt better about being there and his recovery in time.


:praying

Impurrfect

(((Winnie))) - sorry I'm late on this, but sending hugs and prayers your way and to your son. As much as we don't like this stuff going on, the same thing would probably happen in jail. However, in rehab, he's surrounded by people who are there to help him focus on RECOVERY...that wouldn't happen in jail.

You did the right thing, and he's in good hands.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy