Question for Addicts or Ex Addicts
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 584
Question for Addicts or Ex Addicts
Question for ex addicts, tell me did you need to use everyday? My son (17)who I believe is an addict, but I am not sure he uses everyday.........I am sure he smokes weed almost everyday. He seems to go in cycles of use, like one month DXM, then nothing but weed a few weeks then Mushrooms a few weeks........and so on. Now this is what I see, not what he tells me which is nothing. I have started being able to tell when he is on certain drugs, like the mushrooms he is horribly sick the next day. The DXM he looks bizarre. He has used other drugs also, I am just giving an example. When he was withdrawing from extasy, he was clean for about 7 days then he tells himself that he is not an addict and he tells me that, see if I was an addict I couldn't get clean for this long..........Gezzzzz my father was an alcoholic and he could go weeks without drinking, but baby stand back when he starts. I guess the real question I am asking is this the normal behavior of someone addicted to drugs............I guess it depends on the drug of choice maybe?
I know for myself I spent years on speed, and yes I took them everyday. I got on them from a diet doctor and just stayed on the diet many years, but that seems a little different then doing the drugs my son is doing. I guess because I could function with speed, quite well and very fast. LOL I remember telling my doctor I thought I was addicted to the pills and he said OOO no they are not addictive, just habit forming! I thought OOO OK what is the difference! Both are hard to quit.
I know for myself I spent years on speed, and yes I took them everyday. I got on them from a diet doctor and just stayed on the diet many years, but that seems a little different then doing the drugs my son is doing. I guess because I could function with speed, quite well and very fast. LOL I remember telling my doctor I thought I was addicted to the pills and he said OOO no they are not addictive, just habit forming! I thought OOO OK what is the difference! Both are hard to quit.
Attitude of Gratitude
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Dayton, Ohio
Posts: 2,305
Hi MyJoey! First of all, there is no such thing as an ex addict. Once an addict, always an addict. I'm a Recovering Addict, by that I mean that I'm not using anymore but if I pick up, I will go right back where I was. I cannot pick up ever again. Addicts have a tendency of switching their drugs of choice very easily. My younger sister was a cocaine addict, she quit doing coke, started drinking and died from Chirrois of the liver a few years later at the age of 26.
Drug addiction is basically the same as alcoholism. Like you said with your Dad, he didn't drink everyday but when he did, wow! I know several people who are addicts/alcoholics who don't use everyday.
My DOC (drug of choice) was opiate pain killers. Towards the end of my addiction, I was having to take, for example, 20 Vicodin ES when I first woke up in order to not go through withdrawals. I was also trying to achieve that high that I fell in love with in the first place. I lied, cheated, stole, hurt people . . . getting that drug was more important than anything. It took over my life. This doesn't happen to "normal people." A normal person doesn't take pain medication unless they are in pain. I took them to try to feel normal.
If your Son's Grandfather was an alcoholic and you were addicted to speed, chances are, he has a pretty strong likelihood to become an addict/alcoholic.
I have a Son who is now 20 and thank God, he's a "normie" He saw what addiction did to me and is very much against drugs and alcohol. But if he were using, and the drugs your Son is on, I know I would be getting him some help. I encourage you to do so.
If you need someone to talk to on an individual basis, please feel free to PM me.
]
Drug addiction is basically the same as alcoholism. Like you said with your Dad, he didn't drink everyday but when he did, wow! I know several people who are addicts/alcoholics who don't use everyday.
My DOC (drug of choice) was opiate pain killers. Towards the end of my addiction, I was having to take, for example, 20 Vicodin ES when I first woke up in order to not go through withdrawals. I was also trying to achieve that high that I fell in love with in the first place. I lied, cheated, stole, hurt people . . . getting that drug was more important than anything. It took over my life. This doesn't happen to "normal people." A normal person doesn't take pain medication unless they are in pain. I took them to try to feel normal.
If your Son's Grandfather was an alcoholic and you were addicted to speed, chances are, he has a pretty strong likelihood to become an addict/alcoholic.
I have a Son who is now 20 and thank God, he's a "normie" He saw what addiction did to me and is very much against drugs and alcohol. But if he were using, and the drugs your Son is on, I know I would be getting him some help. I encourage you to do so.
If you need someone to talk to on an individual basis, please feel free to PM me.
]
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kansas
Posts: 10,182
There's no such thing as 'normal' behavior for an active addict.
I didn't use every day for many years.
However, it is a progressive disease, and in the end, yes I was using every day. I could not stop.
I didn't use every day for many years.
However, it is a progressive disease, and in the end, yes I was using every day. I could not stop.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 584
Thank you so much. I have had a heck of a time with him and he is now been arrested 3 times....the last two this pasted month so I will hopefully be getting him the help he needs very soon. I knew he was an addict but didn't know if it was normal to go periods without, I guess just second guessing myself.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Fort Wayne IN
Posts: 284
When dealing with this type of situation I would say do not second guess yourself. Sometimes we all need reassurance that what we are thinking and feeling is accurate. Esp. if the truth is difficult.
He is still underage and you should be able to get him in treatment. But, he has to want it for himself. I wish you all the best for you and recovery for your son.
Have you tried alanon?
He is still underage and you should be able to get him in treatment. But, he has to want it for himself. I wish you all the best for you and recovery for your son.
Have you tried alanon?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 584
I Know he is addicted, it is just that sometimes he is so good at conning me. Like he knows we are doing everything possible to help the police stop the newest form of ecstasy going around the school, so he said to me the other day..."Yes that is some bad stuff I could help them out, getting the sellers" I am not normally one to curse, but WTF. He is one of the sellers! Or was. Or he will go work out and tell me how good how good he feels and he is going to stay clean for a while (Never forever), that don't last long. What is done is done as far as him being arrested and I would not have it any different because, in my heart I know he really needs help. I worry already that he is only 17, what is it going to be like when he is 21 or 18. I worry that even if rehab helps him it maybe a temporary fix for him.....I guess time will tell.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Marietta, GA
Posts: 1,453
I dont look at addiction like what you see in the movies - you know the addict who has to have a fix or they go into withdrawals. Its so much more than that. I see addiction as anything you do over and over no matter what the effects are to your life. Your son is like mine he is addicted to being high - using whatever drug he can get. You know its an addiction because no matter what the consequences (jail three times) he'll continue to use.
A logical person who "experimented" with weed and got arrested would not use again. An addict will justify the use. My son uses anything - what i know of are weed, coke, lsd, mushrooms, pain pills, acid, otc drugs, alcohol, and i suspect meth - anything and everything he can get his hands on. So he justifies that pot is natural, not addictive, blah blah blah but when he fails a drug test smoking pot he goes to jail. that means to me that he is an addict.
The way i get around the con is by saying - you can think about weed or any other drug how you want but in my home its not allowed and you're not allowed to use it. It doesnt matter what he thinks is okay - it matters what my boundary is. As for that temporary fix of rehab - my personal thoughts are that my son's brain is not fully developed and he can do some severe brain damage and stunt his brain growth making it even harder to change, so i will take having him in a sober environment anyday - whether he goes back later is his decision but while he's a minor its my responsiblity to try to keep him in a safe environment. I dont see rehab as a "fix" I see it as a "step" in recovery - when you look at it like a journey its easier to comprehend and not feel let down when one thing doesnt work. Each step in the journey has some affect. My son will still be an addict when he comes out but he may learn something that will help him when he is 18, 21, 30, or even 65. I'm not changing him but i'm helping to put tools in front of him that he can choose to use or not use later. If your child were blind you would try to get them help learning how to live in the world - that's the same thing we're doing with an addict child - just educating them on how to live in the world.
I also try to remember that my son is still a kid and kids change their minds as often as they change their clothes. Take it all with a grain of salt - tomorrow will be another story.
A logical person who "experimented" with weed and got arrested would not use again. An addict will justify the use. My son uses anything - what i know of are weed, coke, lsd, mushrooms, pain pills, acid, otc drugs, alcohol, and i suspect meth - anything and everything he can get his hands on. So he justifies that pot is natural, not addictive, blah blah blah but when he fails a drug test smoking pot he goes to jail. that means to me that he is an addict.
The way i get around the con is by saying - you can think about weed or any other drug how you want but in my home its not allowed and you're not allowed to use it. It doesnt matter what he thinks is okay - it matters what my boundary is. As for that temporary fix of rehab - my personal thoughts are that my son's brain is not fully developed and he can do some severe brain damage and stunt his brain growth making it even harder to change, so i will take having him in a sober environment anyday - whether he goes back later is his decision but while he's a minor its my responsiblity to try to keep him in a safe environment. I dont see rehab as a "fix" I see it as a "step" in recovery - when you look at it like a journey its easier to comprehend and not feel let down when one thing doesnt work. Each step in the journey has some affect. My son will still be an addict when he comes out but he may learn something that will help him when he is 18, 21, 30, or even 65. I'm not changing him but i'm helping to put tools in front of him that he can choose to use or not use later. If your child were blind you would try to get them help learning how to live in the world - that's the same thing we're doing with an addict child - just educating them on how to live in the world.
I also try to remember that my son is still a kid and kids change their minds as often as they change their clothes. Take it all with a grain of salt - tomorrow will be another story.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 584
Winnie,
You are on with everything you said, I just love your view on things. My son pulls that one, weed is a natural it grows from the ground....blah blah blah. I just tell him mistletoe and arsenic are naturals also, go chew on them.....what do you have problem with that because their poisonous. LOL
You are on with everything you said, I just love your view on things. My son pulls that one, weed is a natural it grows from the ground....blah blah blah. I just tell him mistletoe and arsenic are naturals also, go chew on them.....what do you have problem with that because their poisonous. LOL
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: San Jose, CA
Posts: 266
Was son around when you were addicted to the speed. Was he ever told that since you were addicted to speed and your father drank to excess the he had could of became an addict when he touched any drugs or booze.
Both my sons were told at a young age that be they could have become addicted to any type of drugs or booze because addiction ran on both sides of the family.
My youngest ones father has an addicting personility meaning he gets addicted to anything he does. He takes everything to the extreme. If he is still 17 years old admit him into a rehab.
He may not want the help now but at least you have to try.
Both my sons were told at a young age that be they could have become addicted to any type of drugs or booze because addiction ran on both sides of the family.
My youngest ones father has an addicting personility meaning he gets addicted to anything he does. He takes everything to the extreme. If he is still 17 years old admit him into a rehab.
He may not want the help now but at least you have to try.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 584
Wooforever,
He knows about my father, but I have never told him about myself. He was around me, but he would not have known anything (he was young) I am not going to tell him either. He would use it against me and throw it in my face as an excuse for him to do drugs. If I thought for a second it would help I would, but I know my son to well in that area. I have already been told by the one rehab he is a future alcoholic. Which could be, but right now he really don't like alcohol that's why he told me he does drugs, he thinks his friends that drink act like jerks when they have to many. He will drink but it is not really his thing, or so he said.
He knows about my father, but I have never told him about myself. He was around me, but he would not have known anything (he was young) I am not going to tell him either. He would use it against me and throw it in my face as an excuse for him to do drugs. If I thought for a second it would help I would, but I know my son to well in that area. I have already been told by the one rehab he is a future alcoholic. Which could be, but right now he really don't like alcohol that's why he told me he does drugs, he thinks his friends that drink act like jerks when they have to many. He will drink but it is not really his thing, or so he said.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
