kinda a funny

Old 01-25-2009, 05:35 AM
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kinda a funny

So my husband has been back home for 3 months now, in recovery. Obviously, I am no where close to trusting him. He was very excited to take me out to dinner using his own money. We get out of the car, he takes out his wallet to move it from his coat pocket to his jeans pocket and starts to panic. "Where is that 20 dollar bill I had?" (BTW, we weren't going out for anything fancy!). He's looking all around the car, in the snow, and what pops into my mind?
This: "What's the definition of a crack addict? Someone who will steal your money then help you look for it"

So while he is frantically searching for the money, I'm thinking if I've noticed any change in his behavior, anything missing from the house, when's the last time I checked my bank acct (although I have done EVERYTHING to make myself safe from him).

Guess what...he found the money in the snow, it fell out when he opened his wallet. He knew I didn't believe him at first, and that made me kind of sad, but also glad that I haven't let my guard down.

Last edited by barblsn; 01-25-2009 at 05:39 AM. Reason: spelling
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Old 01-25-2009, 06:37 AM
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Location: East Tawas, MI
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I am exactly the same way with my recovering daughter. I think it is healthy to protect yourself. Trust needs to be earned back and I feel it will take a really long time before that happens with my daughter. In the meantime I have found that although I have forgiven her for what she did during active addiction, I will never forget it. God gave me that lesson to learn and I have learned it. Hugs, Marle
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Old 01-25-2009, 06:47 AM
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I was right there with you, in your post, when you were waiting while he looked frantically and my thoughts were the same as yours..."Here we go again.."

It took a long time to lose our trust, and will take a long time to gain it back.

I used to tell my son, "I love you and trust you, I just don't trust your disease." He understood that.

Wise woman, you are, to continue to protect yourself and your valuables. Getting blindsided at this stage of the game really smarts. It's about taking care of us, no matter how well they are or are not doing.

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Old 01-25-2009, 10:50 AM
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Moments like that take us back...It's sad but true and I'm glad you can see the humor there as well. I'm sure if he is actively working recovery he understands why you didn't believe him.
Hope you had fun going out together !
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