Home Alone But Never Alone
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Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: NY
Posts: 1,054
Home Alone But Never Alone
I'm home alone til son returns from his visit w/ dad at 8:15pm. His dad now having unsupervised visits bothers me tremendously, and I pray alot during this time.
I wasn't able to make it to a Christmas eve service because I wouldn't have been able to make it home in time for son. So I've spent this time wrapping more gifts, getting Santa's stuff ready.
It's such a different Christmas this year. Dad gets son in the morning 8-11am. I cried and cried in the middle of wrapping tonight. I just can't get around the pain. Older AS gone, w/ OOP. AH gone 2 yrs now, but he and AS did spend Christmas Eve and morning w/ us last year (I didn't want to upset the tradition we've had for sons sake). This year just me and son. It's lonely. Usually I would be making a huge meal, preparing so much, making it special for all. This year it's spaghetti and meatballs cause thats sons favorite. I've even thought of going to a Rescue Mission brunch just to be around people (Its been years since I've done this).
A blessing - We rode the bus today, and son sang "I wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year"
- over and over he sung this. Christmas caroling on the bus. He is so precious, and can find happiness and joy anywhere. I try to smile with him, but inside I felt just so saddened that addiction has seperated my family so much. But I try not to let him see how I feel inside. He's been so happy, and excited for Christmas. But he became sad w/ his head down when he got in the car to leave w/ dad tonight. It saddened me to see this.
Another blessing happened today. A neighbor who plays Santa gave us a ride home from the grocery store. His wife and family have been a blessing. I began to think of my mother (passed away about 14 yrs ago). She used to play the best Santa for many years and was invited to many functions to do this. She would christmas carol with the children (she played the accordian), there would be lines and lines of children waiting to sit on her lap. My sister and brother-in-law have carried the tradition on (but they are many miles away), and now they put the same smiles on so many faces that my mother did. I began to think tonight, it's just like the Lord to put a Santa in our path at the grocery store to give us a ride home on Christmas Eve. This just makes me cry. Thankyou Lord.
While we children (young and old) love Santa, Thankyou Jesus for being the Reason for the Season!
NH7
I wasn't able to make it to a Christmas eve service because I wouldn't have been able to make it home in time for son. So I've spent this time wrapping more gifts, getting Santa's stuff ready.
It's such a different Christmas this year. Dad gets son in the morning 8-11am. I cried and cried in the middle of wrapping tonight. I just can't get around the pain. Older AS gone, w/ OOP. AH gone 2 yrs now, but he and AS did spend Christmas Eve and morning w/ us last year (I didn't want to upset the tradition we've had for sons sake). This year just me and son. It's lonely. Usually I would be making a huge meal, preparing so much, making it special for all. This year it's spaghetti and meatballs cause thats sons favorite. I've even thought of going to a Rescue Mission brunch just to be around people (Its been years since I've done this).
A blessing - We rode the bus today, and son sang "I wish you a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year"
- over and over he sung this. Christmas caroling on the bus. He is so precious, and can find happiness and joy anywhere. I try to smile with him, but inside I felt just so saddened that addiction has seperated my family so much. But I try not to let him see how I feel inside. He's been so happy, and excited for Christmas. But he became sad w/ his head down when he got in the car to leave w/ dad tonight. It saddened me to see this.
Another blessing happened today. A neighbor who plays Santa gave us a ride home from the grocery store. His wife and family have been a blessing. I began to think of my mother (passed away about 14 yrs ago). She used to play the best Santa for many years and was invited to many functions to do this. She would christmas carol with the children (she played the accordian), there would be lines and lines of children waiting to sit on her lap. My sister and brother-in-law have carried the tradition on (but they are many miles away), and now they put the same smiles on so many faces that my mother did. I began to think tonight, it's just like the Lord to put a Santa in our path at the grocery store to give us a ride home on Christmas Eve. This just makes me cry. Thankyou Lord.
While we children (young and old) love Santa, Thankyou Jesus for being the Reason for the Season!
NH7
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