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-   -   Why ? (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-substance-abusers/164319-why.html)

Mewoman 12-13-2008 08:42 AM

Why ?
 
I usually lurk and read , I haven't felt the need to really post in ages , it has been months since my Niece moved out and finally got her own place , after dealing with three years of her living with us throughout her addiction . She moved this boyfriend of eight months into her place , and now she announced she is pregnant , and two nights ago she had what she calls a little slip up ! She stayed out all night and smoked crack , she is four months pregnant ! I am sick at hearing this , her boyfriend called and I have never really had much of a conversation with him before this , I asked him if he was ready to raise a baby all on his own ? I also told him to look up a meeting so he could really fully understand what he is going to be dealing with . Then I sort of gave him a reality check on life , it was kinda mean but I'm sorry I felt like I had to say it straight . I asked him if it was really soo bad to do things 'old school ' i.e get married , get a job , buy a house or at least buy a car ! . I said you don't have much to offer this child at this point , she is working part time and collecting welfare and he is collecting welfare , they are both facing charges , her for seven counts of trafficking cocaine and him for having some weed on him . Love alone is not going to take care of everything . It breaks my heart to think of what this child is coming into .

I am grateful to come here though and just read the posts , there is always soo much love and advice even if it doesn't relate to my situation . :a194:

mooselips 12-13-2008 09:29 AM

(((Mewoman)))
Unfortunately this is a simlar situation that I am now going through, with my 35 year old sons, 19 year old GF due in February.

No house
no car
no job

Sometimes life is overwhelming...and mind boggling.
But I have faith that it's not in my hands, but in Gods.


Hugs, and prayers....

outtolunch 12-13-2008 11:40 AM

Ah, the fantasy of a life without consequenses......


Hang onto your own sanity and do your best to let go, let God.

Mewoman 12-13-2008 02:29 PM

I try to detach from it all but I am scared for that baby and it sounds selfish but I am scared she is gonna end up on our doorstep AGAIN !

marle 12-13-2008 02:35 PM

It sounds like she may wind up in jail. I don't believe that God makes mistakes. There is a reason for everything. Also with both of them facing counts, I am pretty sure that Child Protective Services will be involved at some point in time. Prayers that the baby is born healthy and the mother will find a way to stop using while she is pregnant. The innocent are the ones to suffer most from addiction. Hugs, Marle


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