OhBrother

Have any family of addicts found that in the first couple of weeks of rehab, they actually seem to be doing worse than while they were using?
Its been about 2 weeks since my sister got back on methadone and seeing the doctor (who runs a clinic that deals with the phyisical addiction as well as offers counselling) she'd did rehab with the first time.
This time around she's a month pregnant, and her bf and I talked her into going back rather than her going because of some crisis like being arrested.

When she relapsed this summer and was using (oxy and percs), she actually seemed "fine". Went to work, was alert, came to family events even though she was driving her bf mad behind the scenes.
Now 2 weeks into rehab she seems sluggish, has bad moods, is missing a lot of work, etc.
I'm so used to assuming the worst with her now, that all kinds of paranoid ideas are going through my head: she's faking treatment, she's using on top of the methadone, its going to fail because she didn't hit a rock bottom this time, etc.
OR...maybe I only see this now because I'm closely monitoring her this time, and its all part of the process. Maybe its genuine morning sickness.
Did anyone else find that recovery brought worse before things got better?

ex D-Boy

hey ohbrother and welcome to the forums. I am not a f&f of a substance abuser. i am the substance abuser. My drug of choice started as Oxy and then moved onto heroin. Wanted to welcome you to the board and give you some of my experience.

When somebody starts using opiates on a regular basis and gets physically addicted to them its no longer about the high. they are using just to feel "normal". so when they get their fix they can then go about normal routines of the day because they are physically feeling well. When coming off a long stint of opiates the lack of energy to do ANYTHING is present for several weeks. Being on opiates daily is like living in lala land. there really is no better way to say it, there is no stress, no problems, its not real life. then when the addict gets clean, they start to face all the emotions that were numbed out by the dope and realize all the terrible things they might have done or said while using.

This doesnt comfort them, they are very angry by the fact and just want to run away from it(i know i sure did) I was very grumpy and not willing to do anything during my 30 days of rehab. the techs there had to literally force me out of bed to go to the daily acitvities that were planned for the day. I just didn't care and I hated seeing the world through sober eyes, it was to painful.

BUT!!! it does pass! and as long as the addict continues to not use, the brain will heal itself and be able to replace those natural endorphins that it was getting from the drug. Just encourage her and be supportive, remind her constantly that this is all a process of her body and mind healing from damage the opiates did. It WILL get better I can promise you that.


Also another sidenote :: while you are on opiates, its almost impossible to get sick. I remember when i first got clean back in december of last year i realized that i had two very bad cavities for several months but I was using so much dope that I couldnt feel the pain and had no idea it was even there. After going so long without having any genuine pain its hard for the addict to adjust to sickness because it just hasn't been there for so long. That could be a reason why she is always cranky being that she is pregnant and going through that morning sickness (which i hear is rough) when she isnt used to feeling any discomfort at all. shes been completely numb.

hope that helped a bit ~~ Scotty

NeedingHelp7

Oh brother, it's normal for her to look and feel worse during this time. Detoxing from pills includes alot of sickness, vomitting. That mixed w/ morning sickness has got to be terrible. Though, I'm very surprised she taking methadone while pregnant.

Over on the Substance Abuse Forum you can hear of the many detoxing from those nasty drugs. The story is usually the same....very sick. It's gonna take time for your sister, and I hope she sticks w/ a recovery mindset.

Stay strong, be prepared for anything. Are you attending Alanon/Naranon meetings?

Hoping for the best,
NH7

marle

When my daughter went to rehab she was put on suboxone. What a difference that made for her. She looked and acted normal. She had been using heroin or some other opiate daily for 2+ years. She told me that when she first started to use oxys they made her feel like superwoman. She felt such confidence, had so much energy. And then they turned on her and the only way she could even get out of bed was with the use of opiates. She told me that even a trip to the bathroom was major work and just not worth it. Even on suboxone, she still does not have the energy she had before her addiction but she is so much better than what she was. Another thing that a recovering addict will go through is PAWS. You can google it and read the symptoms. My daughter has had a couple of incidents with PAWS and when she does she gets really cranky, spacey, clumsy, etc. It did not last long but it is rather frustrating. And the other addict behaviors will last well into recovery. I hope your sister feels better soon. Hugs, Marle

Chino

Mine started subs back in January and it took several months before she got her energy back. She's been on an off them a couple of times since then (a detox, a relapse, a couple of surgeries) and is back on them again. This time she knows what to expect from the transition so she's plowing right through it. She sleeps like the dead but when she gets up she makes herself put one foot in front of the other. She's pretty worn out at the end of a day.

Having said all that, during my first pregnancy I felt like 20lb lead weights were tied to each ankle during the first three months and I'm not a substance user. It kicked my ass!

cassandra2

Ohbrother, I saw you had posted on my thread in the substance abuse area. Just wanted to let you know that I think that ex-dboy is absolutely correct. This first week of my x's rehab has been a nightmare. He is soooooo angry with me.

I kicked him out at the beginning of October. He went to live with a sister who is secure stable working has a couple of kids and doing very well for herself. Then after a month there his other sister was moving into her apartment and he decided to move with her. This sister is very UNSTABLE. Has been evicted from 2 apartments this year alone. She doesnt not have the mental ability to realize hey maybe I should pay the electric bill and the lights wont get shut off!!!!

He is angry that he is in the position he is in. And now that he isnt on the pills that made him feel that everything was GREAT. He is pissed... Because really the burden of life now falls directly on his shoulders. Its easier for him to be angry at me then it is to step back and say hey this is my fault. He is still acting like an addict because of him still trying to get pills from the doc. I have read here that the addict behavior continues for a long time. Until they are seriously addressing their issues in rehab they will be angry.

In alot of ways he is also angry at me for walking away. I dont think he ever thought in a million years that I would. I threatened alot but never followed through. When I did he just couldnt handle it. When we are angry with ourselves we hurt the people that mean the most to us. Human nature I guess. but with addicts its alot worse because not only do they have the pain of what is currently happening in their life but also the pain that is causing them to use in the first place.

I hope and pray that at some point the light will go on. I pray that at some point he will experience true feelings and realize all that he has done to himself and those around him. I know when that big ice chunk of anger melts away he is going to collaspe from the emotional well that will come forth. He used to be a very emotional guy. He cried alot. Very attractive for me. He shared alot of his heart with those around him. He had courage to show people how much he cared for them not only with his words but his actions.

Right now his actions still speak very loudly that he is an addict and until that changes I will continue to pray. I hope that these next few weeks will be eye opening for him and your sister.

outtolunch

It's good to hear from you. I remember you from some of your initial shakey posts. I think we laughed about poppy seeds.

And here you are ten months later .......sharing your knowledge and strength.

OhBrother

Thanks all.
That answers a lot of my questions. I've been pulling my hair out a bit because I worry that her job and her bf (she's already on thin ice with both) won't be as patient as I'm trying to be. For instance, she missed work so many times while she was using, I don't think they have much patience for her now that she might actually have a legitimate excuse.
NeedingHelp7: no, haven't been to NA. Up till now have just been making use of this forum...which has been hugely helpful. I'll be talking to her doctor on Monday and will ask her what she recommends for family. And as for methadone with pregnancy, apparently its not such a bad thing...or at least compared with the effects of withdrawal on a pregnancy. Her doctor says babies with methadone addictions can be pretty quickly and routinely detoxed.

sistergldnhair

Wow, I'm glad I read this stuff also..Ex D-Boy put it great. My son has been in rehab for 60 days now. 12 of those in detox and another 6 in a psych hospital, and hearing not so great things from his counselor. Last Friday I spoke with the counselor again and she said that the past 2 weeks, she has seen a change, that he is acting better, looking better...I guess he is getting it, and probably feeling physically better than he has in a long time. He did tell me in one of his letters that when he was still using it was not even about getting high anymore, it was so that he wouldn't get sick, and could function.
Glad I read this thread.

winnie12

My AS never had to go through physical detox as he didnt have a DOC - he did anything and everything. But emotionally I have always noticed that it takes about 6-8 weeks before he starts acting and sounding like my son again. The first couple of weeks sober he is a raging lunatic. I have never liked visiting him during those first few weeks because he is so mentally abusive and angry.

Sad thing is it takes only a few weeks after he starts acting like himself that mind starts playing tricks on him and pulls him back in. It seems he cant handle his sober thoughts and feelings and has to escape.