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-   -   God....Please Help My Family! (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-substance-abusers/162268-god-please-help-my-family.html)

NeedingHelp7 11-17-2008 06:49 AM

God....Please Help My Family!
 
Please I need prayers for my whole family....

I talked to my daughter last night, age 23. She is still living in the same home w/ her EXAfiance, and his parents. The parents live downstairs and her GS, and her abf live upstairs. She and his father went in on a mortgage loan together (I knew it was a bad idea, and a hasty decision on her part from the beginning, now she's stuck). She called last night and told me he's back on pills again (this guy I swear is an exact replica of my AH). How did this happen? I asked her if he was on that stuff when they met, she said no. He said he was a recovering addict. So, she's clear across the states from me and without knowing it ended up w/ a guy just like AH. She hated AH because of what he did to me.
Her exabf lost his last state job because of drug testing positive for opiods/opiates unprescribed. He stopped using, got another job. And now he's using again. He stole her script of hydrocodone, she got from her dentist, he stole $140.00 from her. She has a girl spending a few days w/ her from Oregon, she I guess has a pot prescription (ridiculous) for back pain. He stole some of her pot and cigarettes, opened a pack took some and then blamed it on the baby 2yrs old.
She has to sleep hiding her money, debit card, everything.
She told me last night he was out to dinner w/ a stripper, and took my grandson with him. My daughter had a beautiful brand new $40,000 jeep that was almost paid off, just repo'd, because he's not paying his part of the bills. She's been working over time weekly for years, she's a supervisor at her job.
She told me she almost knocked him out last week. It's getting bad, but she can't afford to leave. I tell her to just leave, and figure out things later. I don't want to see her in trouble or jailed. My daughter says she'll never get married because of what she has seen happen w/ me.
I told her to find naranon/alanon meetings in her area, she said she doesn't have the time.

AS, age 19, whom I have an order of protection against, because of his addiction (pot) and addict behaviors is living w/ his girlfriend. She is pregnant and they don't know if the baby is his or another guys because they were having s_x at the same time she was w/ the other guy.
So they won't find out til the baby is born, and a paternity test is done. My daughter talks w/ him frequently, and says his girlfriend beats on him. AS at times calls my daughter wanting help to get him away from her, but my daughter doesn't have the money to send him to get to her. He's trying to find a job, and attending GED classes, she says he's been clean.

Then here I am supervising visits going through Family Court because AH won't stay clean and sober.

God Please Help My Family!:sad2:

NH7

Impurrfect 11-17-2008 06:57 AM

(((NH7)))

Wow, you've got a lot on your plate! I don't have any great advice, but sending you, and your family, lots and lots of hugs and prayers!

Amy

MsPINKAcres 11-17-2008 07:51 AM

(((NeedingHelp)))

My heart breaks for you to be having so much turmoil in your family.

Although, my situation is not exactly the same as yours - it has been similiar in many ways - lots of chaos with my daughters, their BF/husbands, addictions, and what I believe to be unhealthy decision making.

For me - I spent lots of time reading about the 3 A's (Awareness, acceptance and action); what was my business and what was theirs; and most importantly how to be ok even when my loved ones were hurting & miserable.

It has not been easily and some days it is STILL not easy.

But like you said - "God . . . Please help my family" is one of the best prayers.

I will join my prayers with yours and ask for God's best in each one of these situations.

Hugs to YOU!!

Rita

marle 11-17-2008 08:05 AM

Sending my hugs and prayers for you and your family. Addiction hurts so many. Hugs, Marle

BBD 11-17-2008 09:00 AM

Sending my love and prayers your way. Addiction is a real killer~~~~if families and those close by. Hugs and smiles, Bonnie

baxter 11-17-2008 09:17 AM

Here's some hugs. I thought I was the only who had such day to day drama. That's what's so wonderful about being here. Just about everybody here REALLY does know what you're going through and at least you're not alone.

Hugs

Chino 11-17-2008 09:29 AM

Prayers are on their way.

rozied 11-17-2008 10:06 AM

Oh Boy, do you ever have your hands full. Prayer going out for you, & your family.
Love,
Diane

mooselips 11-17-2008 03:30 PM

NeedingHelp7,
Good grief, maybe it's just the time of the year when everyone goes off the deep end? I'm having quite a few issues here, also, but NOW I'm not answering the phone, which makes life bearable. There's nothing I can do about the situations they have theirselves in...anyway.

Turn it over to your H.P.
He has a way of figuring it all out.

Prayers for you and your family.......

Ann 11-17-2008 03:45 PM

Add my prayers too, for you and your family.

They all have choices, better choices than the life they are living...but we can't make them learn any faster than we learned from our mistakes. It tough watching them destroy their lives, but it helps me to say a prayer too and just give it all to God to sort out.

Hugs

NeedingHelp7 11-17-2008 05:05 PM

Thankyou all,

Yes, that's the way I look at it too, they have choices now too. I want them close, but I know for now distance is okay, they have to learn for themselves now. I'm just hoping sooner than later. As much as I want to get on the phone and give them advice, they just aren't open. There's much denial there, and hopefully God will break through that denial.

I've turned them all over to the care of God, and pray that everything changes for the better for them.

Thanks2HP 11-17-2008 05:55 PM

I wish there was something that I could do or say to help. Please know that I care and hope & pray for change for the better for you and your family.

cassandra2 11-17-2008 05:56 PM

Praying for your family.

This to shall pass.....


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