sistergldnhair

Why is it, everything seems fine, calm. And I am standing at the counter making applecrisp and my mind is racing about AS and the whole experience of the past few months, and I start bawling like a baby. It just comes out of nowhere and knocks me off my feet.

Wishing I had someone close I could talk with, who knows what it's like. Probably cause I got a letter from him yesterday. First letter from rehab, and it was a really nice letter. He sounds good, sincere, why is there that part of me that peeks out, and says...it's too soon, don't believe everything he is saying. Or maybe I can believe what he's saying, but know that he does not have enough time under his belt to achieve it.

He was so proud that he got his 30 day coin last week. A big moment for him....

I'm just weepy tonight, and this is the first place I come...thanks for listening.

Eileen

Ann

Eileen, it`s okay to have a good cry. Lord knows we have stuffed our feelings for far too long.

Going to meetings helped me with that feeling of needing someone who understood to talk to. The first thing I remember of any meeting was walking in the door and realizing I was with people who knew my story, knew my pain and liked me anyway. If there are any Alanon, Naranon or CoDA meetings in your area, I promise it would help you more than you know to go.

And of course SR is always here, day and night, to walk with you and hold your hand when it gets scary.

It`s good news that he is in rehab and my prayers go out that this is the beginning of a new life for him.

Hugs

cece1960

Every once in a while (especially when the hormones are running rampant) I have a reality "hit" that sends me reeling. The good news is that a while ago, I had a hard time getting back on track. Now, I often accept the cry and try to move on.

As Ann said, we're here if you need us...and I ALWAYS bring extra tissues

((((Hugs)))

marle

I know that feeling. Meetings do help. When my daughter got her 30 days she was so proud. Unfortunately I think that she is continuing to slip. She should have had 5 months yesterday and she did not even mention it. It is okay to cry. Sometimes it is what we really need. Hugs, Marle

painter

Sometimes crying to the body's way of releasing all the pain and stress we have built up. If we didn't have some kind of release it would probably kill us. Hang tight, do whatever you NEED to do to survive this. Cry, scream , pout. Whatever. And do it for however long you need to do it. It is the same when you lose someone through death. Everyone is different. Love to you and my prayers.

mooselips

(((Eileen))
It's okay to cry, in fact it's a good thing, gets rid of that stress that causes other medical problems.

Anyway...I remember when I drove youngest AS to rehab,
I came home and cried my eyes out.
I just felt such relief that he was somewhere safe,
and somewhere where he could get help if he truly wanted it.

baxter

I'd probably have more crying spells if it didn't make my nose run so much. They sometimes hit me out of nowhere. A sappy commerical sometimes will make me bawl like a baby. It seems like it just builds and builds and I don't realize it and then bam! here come the waterfalls. To me it feels like such a release and helps me carry on.

Hugs and hope it helped.

greeteachday

I felt as if I became frozen while my daughter was in active addiciton...just running from crisis to crisis. Her first trips to rehab and me finding SR and Naranon meetings all kind of coincided. I felt as if knowing she was in a safe place and having people who understood what I was going through helped me to go through a defrost cycle...There were a lot of tears and lots of emotions...tough during the time, but I really felt it was what I needed to get on and stay on my own recovery path.

Hope the good cry helped and you have a restful night. Hugs

grateful2b

((Eileen))
Inspite of all our efforts to stuff our feelings down,just so we can function and take care of business, they pop up out of nowhere, good thing too, nature's way of giving us the release we need...stress can be so toxic...allow yourself that...I hope you have a chance to get some face to face, Alanon or naranon...it can be such a huge support for our pain...and we are here, with hugs, always... Grateful

sistergldnhair

Thanks for the pep talk guys. I had a rough time last night, but feel in a better frame of mind today. I have two semi-local (live in the boonies) Families Anonymous groups. I might go to the meeting tonight or tomorrow, or if I can swing it....both.

I guess everyone needs a good cry now and again. I try to hold things in when in my day to day life, pushing things back because it's not the time or place to let it out, and it does all build up. Then when I'm alone..WHAM..but it felt good to cry, and I can face another day.

Off to work, have a great one!
Eileen

caileesnana

Cry and let it out, you will feel better. I believe we cry because we care, we are hurt and ultimately, we love! Tears are Gods way of washing away some of the hurt and pain.

Congrats to your son!
susan

winnie12

You're not alone. I find I put on my strong face and do what I have to do - I say all the right things and behave the right way. Everything is fine and everyone tells me I'm doing great. But then i'll be doing some mundane task and a memory will cross my mind and I just break. We cant all be perfectly strong all the time. We still love them and we still care. I think I would be more worried if you said you never got sad because then you would be shutting down natural emotions of love.

My son is in rehab and I miss him so very much. I have been so close to him all of his life and to not wake up everyday and talk to him makes me so lonely sometimes. Just because he is an addict doesnt mean that there arent wonderful things about him that I miss and love. He is still my little boy and there are somethings that only he understands about me because they are things we went through together.

Geeze louise now I'm crying. I miss mine too. But its good and its releasing and I'm so glad that I still love him enough to feel this way. In so many ways it helps because as long as I feel this strong love for him then there is hope that one day we'll be able to have a relationship again

There is nothing wrong with having a good cry and you're not alone.

iinertiacreepss

my boyfriend smokes crack and i dont know much about the rehab stuff because he's homeless without medical insurance and i can barely help him because i'm only 19... and i dont know the 30 day coins you speak of but i know you are not alone. because i am here. and i feel so alone as well. and i am new to this site but i came here to feel understood and talk to others that understand...because everyday i look at people and i feel like they really dont seem to suffer like i do. and i feel terribly alone, because it consumes my thoughts. and i know what its like to be proud when they say they feel great and they don't need the drug, but you cant help being saddened deep down because you think its too soon.

i really know how you feel. i do. things will get better. just stay strong. im here trying to do the same, day to day

Impurrfect

(((iinertiacreeps))

Welcome to SR, sweetie. I am a recovering crack addict, and have been where your bf (boyfriend) is. I know you want to help him, but he is the only one who can really help himself. If you give him money, he will use it on crack.

I had to hit bottom, and so will he. My bottom was sped up because my family would not help me unless I got clean...no money, no coming home, etc.

It's hard, but he has to want recovery before it will work.

((sister)) - I'm glad you can still cry. Strange as that sounds, it's just a normal reaction to all you've been through. Crying certainly hasn't solved any of my problems, but I do feel better afterwards. Think of it as your body releasing a lot of tension throug the tears.

Hope you are having a better day.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

HurtingDad

No matter how we try to stuff it...the emotions come out somewhere and crying is (1) good for you (2) legal and
(3) Free.

People will tell me how well I'm handling things and I appreciate their feelings, but they don't see me at home curled up into a ball...maybe having on beer to many

This board helps a lot always someone to talk to.

Prayers going your way.