Blogs


Notices

Got chewed out by the counselor

Old 10-16-2008, 08:42 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
Administrator
 
greeteachday's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
I agree that their recovery is about them; that counselors for the most part are very dedicated and passionate about their jobs and that there is a reason for no contact rules (indeed, I wished at the times when my daughter was going through those initial days in rehab, that there would be not just a no contact rule, but actually no phones around too. Finally I learned the choice to answer or not was mine).
However, maybe I am just overanalyzing this, but it seems that a hospital staff person asked Eileen to call the rehab and ask them to call the hospital...She did so; they didn't hear the message correctly and they showed up instead. As a result, Eileen is yelled at. To me that has little to do with her son's recovery and more like the counselor had a bad day and a bad reaction. IMO, no one deserves to be treated that way. Let it go? Sure why not, but I think her feelings about what happened are valid.

I also know that I have snapped at people who didn't deserve to be snapped at because I was stressed. I know better now and at least when I do, I try to catch myself and apologize. This post has made me think about the many times I didn't, regardless of how legitimate my stress was, and I hope that somehow I have a way to make amends to anyone that I treated so poorly.

Eileen, I hope that she has thought about her reaction as much as you have thought about the experience and that the next conversation includes an apology. Hugs.
greeteachday is offline  
Old 10-17-2008, 07:01 AM
  # 22 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Orange County, NY
Posts: 116
I should be getting a call from the counselor today. She said she'd call by the end of the week for an update. I of course, have settled down a bit since the phone call. I didn't hear from him all week (good thing, as doing so would mean he was breaking rules). I hope for a more pleasant phone call this time, and I will feel out the mood of the phone call, as to whether I bring up the other one. At the very least, I'd like to tell her that I was very upset at the call, and the tone, and not for nothing, my nerves are raw the past few weeks, and I'm just muddling through a sticky situation best I know how.
I'll let you know if anything is said, and thanks for all the concern. It's nice to come to a place where "our" feelings count, instead of the addicts.


Eileen
sistergldnhair is offline  
Old 10-17-2008, 09:30 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
Guest
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Southeast
Posts: 114
Originally Posted by sistergldnhair View Post
It's nice to come to a place where "our" feelings count, instead of the addicts.


Eileen
It really is a help to read the posts here and learn. Sure is an isolating experience at times.
Neverwanted is offline  
Old 10-22-2008, 04:54 PM
  # 24 (permalink)  
To Life!
 
historyteach's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Did you hear?

And how'd it go if you did?
I hope you got an apology, or at least good vibes.
The recovery *is* about him; not you. You had no reason to get the brunt of the counselor's stress...or whatever it was. And I'm sorry that you had to endure it.
JMHO

Shalom!
historyteach is offline  
Old 10-23-2008, 05:24 AM
  # 25 (permalink)  
Member
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Orange County, NY
Posts: 116
Yes, she called Tuesday morning. I didn't say anything about the hurt feelings as she was pleasant on the phone, and even apologized several times for not calling me at the end of the week. She asked if she was supposed to? and I said yes, you said you'd call the end of last week. "I'm sorry, I must not have wrote it down, that's not like me". and she apologized a few more times.

All I cared to hear was that AS is doing well. He's got alot of work to do, working on behaviors and attitudes, but she said he is showing some positive things, he's not speaking of leaving, no bad or suicidal thoughts, he's taking some constructive criticisim from his peers in group. He shaved and got such good response from the others that he's thinking of cutting his hair (think Gregg Allman). She said she'd call next week and let him speak to me as well.

Thanks for caring.
sistergldnhair is offline  
Old 10-23-2008, 05:42 AM
  # 26 (permalink)  
Ph.D in insanity!!
 
Stubborn1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Florida
Posts: 698
For me personally Effexor did not work. I was out of breath and pure exhausted from it. I would sweat like crazy. I have to agree they should change his anti depressants. I switched to Lexapro and it has been a godsend.
Everyone reacts differently. They had my husband on something and he flipped and had thoughts of killing me and himself and he's not like that at all. He was fine once he stopped the anti depressants.
Stubborn1 is offline  
Old 10-23-2008, 06:03 PM
  # 27 (permalink)  
To Life!
 
historyteach's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Rhode Island
Posts: 9,293
Originally Posted by sistergldnhair View Post
Yes, she called Tuesday morning. I didn't say anything about the hurt feelings as she was pleasant on the phone, and even apologized several times for not calling me at the end of the week. She asked if she was supposed to? and I said yes, you said you'd call the end of last week. "I'm sorry, I must not have wrote it down, that's not like me". and she apologized a few more times.

All I cared to hear was that AS is doing well. He's got alot of work to do, working on behaviors and attitudes, but she said he is showing some positive things, he's not speaking of leaving, no bad or suicidal thoughts, he's taking some constructive criticisim from his peers in group. He shaved and got such good response from the others that he's thinking of cutting his hair (think Gregg Allman). She said she'd call next week and let him speak to me as well.

Thanks for caring.
I'm glad it went well for you...
And my prayers are with your boy. I hope he does well. Glad he's feeling better about himself. It can make a world of difference.

Shalom!
historyteach is offline  

Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off




All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:54 AM.