I need a hug
Restoring myself to sanity
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Georgia
Posts: 1,018
I need a hug
My AH relapsed a couple of months ago and has shown no signs of slowing down. My MIL and I talked about doing an intervention but we had a snag with my insurance. My insurance will not pay for long term inpatiant stay, they only pay for detox which is about three days.. Our lovely health care system at work!!!!! Rehab is 30K and my MIL is willing to foot the bill but she wants to make sure that my AH is sick and tired of himself before she shells out that kind of money and I don't blame her. 30K is a lot of money!!!
Money is kind of tight in our house right now and apparantly my AH ran out of his DOC because he had no money to buy them and is withdrawling. He told me last night that he wants help that he is tired of being a slave to this addiction. I talked to him about going to rehab but he wants to go to a suboxone clinic instead. While all that is fine and good, I think in the long run he will find himself right back where he is now if he does not do a good 6 weeks of inpatiant rehab. His words of wanting help are encouraging but his actions right now are not telling me that anything is changing.
I have been on this rollar coaster for about a year now.. and it's only recently that I have been finally brave enough to just surrender this to my HP. I know that my HP has a bigger plan then I do and I'm trying to put all my faith and trust in him that things will work out for both me and my husbands highest good. I know that there is a lesson in all of this but I'm not quite sure what it is yet. Maybe it's teaching me to love and put myself first, I have always had a hard time doing that but here lately I have had to do just that in order to survive.
I don't know what the future holds for me and my AH, I do not know if he is included in the bigger plan the Universe has for me or not. I try not to think about it and here lately have just been putting one foot in front of the other and concentrating on my journey.
But today, I need a hug because it hurts to see the person you love suffer and not be able to do anything about it. The love I have for him is great enough that I'm going to sit back and let him hurt, let him be sick and let him be miserable because at this point nursing him to health and coddeling him will only hurt him rather then help him..
Thanks for letting me share..
Money is kind of tight in our house right now and apparantly my AH ran out of his DOC because he had no money to buy them and is withdrawling. He told me last night that he wants help that he is tired of being a slave to this addiction. I talked to him about going to rehab but he wants to go to a suboxone clinic instead. While all that is fine and good, I think in the long run he will find himself right back where he is now if he does not do a good 6 weeks of inpatiant rehab. His words of wanting help are encouraging but his actions right now are not telling me that anything is changing.
I have been on this rollar coaster for about a year now.. and it's only recently that I have been finally brave enough to just surrender this to my HP. I know that my HP has a bigger plan then I do and I'm trying to put all my faith and trust in him that things will work out for both me and my husbands highest good. I know that there is a lesson in all of this but I'm not quite sure what it is yet. Maybe it's teaching me to love and put myself first, I have always had a hard time doing that but here lately I have had to do just that in order to survive.
I don't know what the future holds for me and my AH, I do not know if he is included in the bigger plan the Universe has for me or not. I try not to think about it and here lately have just been putting one foot in front of the other and concentrating on my journey.
But today, I need a hug because it hurts to see the person you love suffer and not be able to do anything about it. The love I have for him is great enough that I'm going to sit back and let him hurt, let him be sick and let him be miserable because at this point nursing him to health and coddeling him will only hurt him rather then help him..
Thanks for letting me share..
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
awwww, sweetie, sending you BIG hugs and prayers!
I hope your husband has hit bottom, but his actions don't really say that. I also hope that you can find a way to focus on you and what you want.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
I hope your husband has hit bottom, but his actions don't really say that. I also hope that you can find a way to focus on you and what you want.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Ma
Posts: 320
Originally Posted by jerect 
Rehab is 30K and my MIL is willing to foot the bill but she wants to make sure that my AH is sick and tired of himself before she shells out that kind of money and I don't blame her. 30K is a lot of money!!!
Money is kind of tight in our house right now and apparantly my AH ran out of his DOC because he had no money to buy them and is withdrawling. He told me last night that he wants help that he is tired of being a slave to this addiction. I talked to him about going to rehab but he wants to go to a suboxone clinic instead. While all that is fine and good, I think in the long run he will find himself right back where he is now if he does not do a good 6 weeks of inpatiant rehab. His words of wanting help are encouraging but his actions right now are not telling me that anything is changing.
Money is kind of tight in our house right now and apparantly my AH ran out of his DOC because he had no money to buy them and is withdrawling. He told me last night that he wants help that he is tired of being a slave to this addiction. I talked to him about going to rehab but he wants to go to a suboxone clinic instead. While all that is fine and good, I think in the long run he will find himself right back where he is now if he does not do a good 6 weeks of inpatiant rehab. His words of wanting help are encouraging but his actions right now are not telling me that anything is changing.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,307
Jerect..... (((hugs)))... I have to be quick here...... but
check out some info on the BUP aka subutex/suboxone. From what I have read and have learned - I am a huge advocate for it.
Check out this forum
Your husband would get counseling through the program that would address his "go big /go home" mentality - meaning the need to take more of everything. Or using in a form of self medicating. The subs are just a bandaid.... not a cure - but it provides time to to help the addict live on life's terms.... and if properly weaned off of it.... ie. long taper - the withdrawals aren't all that bad. The key thing is doing the taper.
AND your insurance might cover it!
Thinking of you while I was on my way to work this morning...... so coming in and seeing this thread - was a telepathic type experience.
You are taking care of you - you have resigned this to your HP - you are doing good. Very proud of you chica!
Peace xoxoxo
check out some info on the BUP aka subutex/suboxone. From what I have read and have learned - I am a huge advocate for it.
Check out this forum
Your husband would get counseling through the program that would address his "go big /go home" mentality - meaning the need to take more of everything. Or using in a form of self medicating. The subs are just a bandaid.... not a cure - but it provides time to to help the addict live on life's terms.... and if properly weaned off of it.... ie. long taper - the withdrawals aren't all that bad. The key thing is doing the taper.
AND your insurance might cover it!
Thinking of you while I was on my way to work this morning...... so coming in and seeing this thread - was a telepathic type experience.
You are taking care of you - you have resigned this to your HP - you are doing good. Very proud of you chica!
Peace xoxoxo
Last edited by greeteachday; 10-10-2008 at 09:04 PM.
turning red!
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: hong kong
Posts: 254
BIG HUG coming your way from Hong Kong
~~~~~~~~~~~~(((((((((Jerect)))))))))~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~
talking about rehab, don't they have government rehab in US? My abf is currently in a state rehab and don't pay anything. Hope hubby will get back on track soon
xox
~~~~~~~~~~~~(((((((((Jerect)))))))))~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~
talking about rehab, don't they have government rehab in US? My abf is currently in a state rehab and don't pay anything. Hope hubby will get back on track soon
xox
the girl can't help it
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
It just now sunk in that your MIL is willing to shell out 30 grand for rehab whoa.... Salvation Army is free...and they have a great program for people who want to get clean. There is so much free help I just hate to hear of an older woman shelling out that kind of cash....
((((((BIGHUGS))))))
((((((BIGHUGS))))))
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
