baxter

For almost all my life I've had the "I'm sorry" bug. It's taken me a lot of work not to use those words and I've been breaking the habit.

Seems like I was always the one to say "I'm sorry" whenever there was anything going on with my AH's, it wasn't that I was really sorry for what I said or did, it was just easier to say "I'm sorry" and then get on with life.

People would run into ME in the grocery store and I'd be the one to say "I'm sorry" like it was my fault.

If it rained and ruined the day I'd say "I'm sorry" like it was my fault.

I'd speak my mind, not with anger, then say "I'm sorry" if it hurt someone else's feelings, my family especially, then look at then in amazement when they spoke what was on their minds without a care in the world.

I've just felt it my duty to say those words over and over just to keep peace and go on with life.

Now, I see my oldest daughter has the bug. We spent the weekend at camp and it drove me crazy. The smoke from the fire was going in my eyes and the first thing she said was "I'm sorry". Well, it's not your fault. The next day I started keeping track and she said she "was sorry" 57 times for things she hadn't done or had no control over.

How is it some of us have that bug and to others they could care less. I also have this "I'm the one who always moves" bug too. Wherever we are and there's foot traffic and the like, even if I'm the one walking in the right direction, I'm always the one that moves while others keep right on track without a care in the world. It's somehow they all know I'm the one who will budge. Sometime I'm gonna stand my ground and see if others walk around me. Ha!

Impurrfect

(((Baxter)))

I was always saying "I'm sorry", too. It took a long time for me to become aware of it, and even longer to stop saying it all the time.

I also moved out of the way, even if it shouldn't have been me. I think I was always watching everyone else and trying to figure out what THEY were doing and reacting (typical codie). I've actually gotten to the point where I'm so focused on where I'm going, I bump into someone..THEN the "I'm sorry" is at least appropriate

Hugs and prayers!

Amy

endzoner

Baxter.. i dont think thats really a bad thing i think it makes us a lil more caring then others is all , It shows compassion when someone says there tired or had a bad day and the responce being " im sorry ". sure maybe its takin a bit far beyond needed. But still i just think it makes us kinder hearted is all . And if thats a bad thing I'd hate to see what horrible would be . Ive had ppl say sorry to me for an emotion or something i was troubled about , My relpy is thanks for the concern but its not your fault . I dont see any harm in it .. just my two cents and sorry your feeling bad bout saying sorry

Chino

I did that a few years ago and had so much fun. It was because I had read a NYC study about women being the worst to take up an entire sidewalk when in a group, instead of single file. Men, when they encountered walkers from the other direction, would transition to single file. Women did not, to the extreme of sometimes forcing others off the sidewalk and onto the street.

Every time I was alone on a busy sidewalk, I just kept on walking, sometimes right into a large group. I refused to budge. I never had so many women snarl at me and I could not stop laughing. What made it funnier was one time they all stopped to express their outrage to each other, causing a complete stop for anyone else on the sidewalk. That's when everyone started jostling them LOL!

outtolunch

Count me as another, who for kicks, will sometimes just plod along and wait for the oncoming traffic to move. Like Chino, guys tend to revert to single file on automatic pilot. Women usually do not. I figure they must watch too many Sex in the City reruns.

BBD

Hi Baxter~~I think as women (codependant women)) the "I'm sorry" bug is built into us. I do the exact same things you do and now you have me wondering. I just thought it was my caring attitude towards others but maybe it is a fault.....Oh no~~something else to work on. It seems as women we just want things happy and calm so we take over and do what we can to make our world nice.....Have you ever notice when you enter a room that you say "Hello" to everyone forst also?? I do! But, I don't ask my children questions anymore that I don't really want to hear the answers to. LOL Smiles,Bonnie

baxter

I still use I'm sorry's but they are a sympathy "sorry" or feeling sorrow, as compared to one used as an apology and mainly for things I never did, or at least felt I had to apologize for, but just to keep peace or get things back on track I'd be the one to always say it.

The "I'm sorry I yelled at you last night when you came home drunk and woke up everyone in the house for nothing and called me all kinds of names."

"I'm sorry" I got angry and upset with you after I came home and found you had stole all my money and I told you to move out.

Them there "I'm sorry's" just to feel like I had to get things back to normal. Little did I know.

SlvrMag

Something someone told me was if I REALLY feel I need to apologize for something, say just that - "I apologize" rather than "I'm sorry".

It's just FEELS stronger, kinda like a firm handshake compared to a timid one.