Callie

An update of sorts - AH finally went off on MIL and for now she finally "gets" it and has left us alone. For now anyway. Today our dog had puppies and dd wanted to call MIL - I said sure and called and told MIL dd wanted to talk to her. They talked for about 15 minutes. I was glad for the both of them. Of course MIL was very cordial to me. It's sad for BOTH of us because I know she loves me, but of course she loves her son more. I cannot or would not even try to penetrate that bond. It's just hard because she's not really rational in all of this. She's trying to turn the tables because HER AS is NOT what she thought he was. It's sad for all of us...the kids, AH and I.

I can forgive her for this drama if she lets it go, but in reality OUR R has probably changed forever. I've never had to watch my back with her, but from here on out is a different story. I still love her though. I know and see her heart. Thanks for reading guys.

baxter

This might be a silly question, but do you know how much of what AH tells you is the whole truth or what he may have started himself to get back home?

When I threw my AH out and he had to move back home I knew my MIL was ticked because she had him back in her lap. I'd hear all the same things from everyone that you do about MIL and son would call me with the same things. Come to find out he'd be the one who would start it all with his mother and he'd tell me she said this, and she said that, or SIL said this or that.

I confronted MIL one day, after something AH said she had said and that's when we found out that AH was the one who was playing both sides of the deck. I know you say AH finally went off on MIL - did he or did he just tell you that since he sees you weren't going to take it anymore or let it bother you? See, it got to the point that I couldn"t believe anything unless I was actually there and heard it.

In fact, there's few things I believe anymore that I hear secondhand. I want to go directly to the horse's mouth.

Have you ever suggested all three of you sit down and discuss the whole thing?
Just an idea. Then there wouldn't be any he/she said, it would be all up front.

Callie

Thanks Baxter - Yes, I have thought of the fact that he's playing both sides of the fence. He may be, but that's just not his style. His mom really is clueless about ALOT. AH has suggested multiple times that MIL and I sit down and just lay it out. I said I would be fine to do that, but that I wanted him there so their was NO second hand drama behind anyone's back. That will be our next step I'm sure. Right now I'm too swamped with anything to even deal with that. So for now it's been put on the back burner I guess.

Callie

Bump for ffsa

Callie

I read this thread from 1.5 years ago and am glad at how far I've come and an apalled @ how far out of reality I was.