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AS drives me nuts

Old 08-19-2008, 03:32 PM
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AS drives me nuts

21 AS called me Saturday morning very depressed. He let me know he was hungry and had no food ( he can afford drugs though) he then told me he had gotten himself in to trouble and that there were people looking for him. Basically he was not going to have a life if he did not pay these people.
Great way to start a Saturday. I should have hung up on him.
I was so angry I said to him "thats great your starving and you could end up dead" thanks for a great morning. "I then said I would run down to the pawn shop and sell my wedding rings and drive right over to give him food, then I would go pay his dealers" ( of course I wouldnt") I thanked him for a nice phone call and let him know I was his mom and thats what mothers are for to pay drug dealers, give there kids money,feed him, let him steal from me and he should call me when ever he wants to scam money out of me. He was quite shocked and hung up on me. He called today and apoligized. It was short and sweet he also said he wouldnt dump his crap on me like that again. He also asked if I was mentally alright. I let him know "dont ever call me again like that I have had enough" Don't quite know why I posted this just needed to vent today.
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Old 08-19-2008, 03:54 PM
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Sounds like you spoke your peace and for now he got it. Good for you Hugs, Marle
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Old 08-19-2008, 05:18 PM
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go Katie...
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Old 08-19-2008, 05:29 PM
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get it, give it, grow in it
 
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Katie- way to set your boundaries and to detach.
Sounds like you are becoming healthier in your choices in the difficult situation of being the mother of a grown-up man/child addict.
They will manipulate + take advantage if we let them.
I too refuse to let the chaos of my son's addiction cause chaos in my own life and home.
Mental chaos is a tougher one to keep at bay, but with work on our life and spiritual growth it becomes easier.
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Old 08-19-2008, 06:41 PM
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That's funny the way you handled that Katie!! I know it probably wasn't funny when it happened. But you did great!

My son has also told me that others are after him, do I want him dead????blah.. blah.. blah..
No food, he's starving! blah.. blah.. blah..

and more blah...blah...blah...blah....blah....blah....blah. ..blah.

:ghug

NH7
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Old 08-19-2008, 06:59 PM
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katie, that is the best example of productive anger I've read in a while and good for you
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Old 08-19-2008, 07:02 PM
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that was pretty funny, really!!
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Old 08-20-2008, 05:36 AM
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(((((katie))))) my son gives me so much more respect when i started taking care of me. he calls it tough love but i do not see it that way. i am taking care of me. it took baby steps for me to get to where i am today. you did really good. sending prayers up for you both.
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Old 08-20-2008, 07:48 AM
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Katie,

Way to go!

Thanks for the experience - gives me ideas for responses to my 27 yr old AS and encouragement that I too may one day be able to say "no" and mean it.

So thanks again for the post - now you know why you posted, to help others!
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Old 08-20-2008, 09:29 AM
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Good for you. It's probably not what it wanted to hear but definitely something he needed to hear. Don't let him make you feel guilty for telling him how you feel.
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Old 08-20-2008, 09:53 AM
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GO KATIE!!!!

Hugs and prayers!

Amy
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Old 08-20-2008, 10:21 AM
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All Right Katie, You go woman.....Stay strong.
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Old 08-20-2008, 10:36 AM
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Amazing how when we say no - and really mean it - they "get it". And sometimes even apologize.

When I respect myself, it causes others to respect me also.

I teach people how to treat me.

You go girl!!!!

Love in recovery,
Jody Hepler

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Old 08-20-2008, 07:05 PM
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Sweet.
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