Character defects........
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,307
Character defects........
My character defects come out SO HUGE in this. I can't stand it. *THAT* is what hurts me so much. MYSELF!
I was so doing so good..... and then BOOM...... I just hurt myself through it all.
Sucks...... I absolutely can not stand this.
This has to have been the longest week.
UGH........
Worst of all I'm probably going to have stop coming here, because my guy knows about this site.
I was so doing so good..... and then BOOM...... I just hurt myself through it all.
Sucks...... I absolutely can not stand this.
This has to have been the longest week.
UGH........
Worst of all I'm probably going to have stop coming here, because my guy knows about this site.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,307
Thanks SL.... The 3 C's .... seriously!!!!!!!! WHY do I not use them before I act??? In hindsight or in advice I can use them..... but with myself when in the throws of it all... it's like I'm not even aware.
I hope to get back to that place of gratitude. I had it for about 12 hours and it was a fantastic place to be!!!!!
I hope to get back to that place of gratitude. I had it for about 12 hours and it was a fantastic place to be!!!!!
Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Burnsville, MN
Posts: 966
Abundance,
I'd hate to lose you - can you register again under a different name?
Sure know the pain of suffering with relapses myself and that I know the right answers but can't seem to apply them to myself all the time.
Take a breath and get back in the game - we need you!
I'd hate to lose you - can you register again under a different name?
Sure know the pain of suffering with relapses myself and that I know the right answers but can't seem to apply them to myself all the time.
Take a breath and get back in the game - we need you!
Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: East Tawas, MI
Posts: 3,683
Abundance, We are all imperfect humans. Everyone of us still does things that are not good for us. It is afterall progress, not perfection
Please stay. You add so much to the boards. My daughter knows about this site and if she hears me pounding away on the keyboard she asks me if I am saying something about her. I just tell her I am giving my ESH. I speak the truth from my perspective. She might have a different one, but she does not live in my skin nor I in hers. Hugs, Marle
Please stay. You add so much to the boards. My daughter knows about this site and if she hears me pounding away on the keyboard she asks me if I am saying something about her. I just tell her I am giving my ESH. I speak the truth from my perspective. She might have a different one, but she does not live in my skin nor I in hers. Hugs, Marle
*~10 YEARS BABY~*
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Hollywood
Posts: 9,369
You can talk to MG or Ann about your problem before you leave.... They can help you figure out something....
Usually our biggest weaknesses are in some way our biggest strengths also.
****{Abundance}}}
My character defects come out SO HUGE in this.
****{Abundance}}}
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: To the North
Posts: 1,086
First of all AB! PLEASE, figure out a new name! Hate to lose you!
As for relapses, I think I'm in the middle of a relapse myself, or more precisely, barely holding on from sliding into one!
Not with my AH, but with a friend and her daughter. It's all I can do not to scream at her "what are you thinking, don't you know your daughter needs at least one parent?" She's a good parent, usually she is, but old Love, which is now New Love seems to be overriding all common sense and I just see her daughter, 19, feeling like she has "no" parents. That's what she's said to me. I'm holding my own, I know I need to stand back and let what will be will be, I can support, love, etc. but, it's so hard and when I saw your thread... Thanks for starting this and extra inspiration!
Stick around, find a way - please!
As for relapses, I think I'm in the middle of a relapse myself, or more precisely, barely holding on from sliding into one!
Not with my AH, but with a friend and her daughter. It's all I can do not to scream at her "what are you thinking, don't you know your daughter needs at least one parent?" She's a good parent, usually she is, but old Love, which is now New Love seems to be overriding all common sense and I just see her daughter, 19, feeling like she has "no" parents. That's what she's said to me. I'm holding my own, I know I need to stand back and let what will be will be, I can support, love, etc. but, it's so hard and when I saw your thread... Thanks for starting this and extra inspiration!
Stick around, find a way - please!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Posts: 325
My earlier post?
I read this and want to clarify- (codie here!) Written it sounds much different.
Personally, I find the the C's- the hardest of anything I have heard or attempted to learn. That line was said with a sigh.
As for the gratefulness, it took me a long time to get there. I was full of the *stupid me's* and felt a great deal of shame. My greatest problem was, I felt that I had put my son's through another painful experience, another loss.
Looking back, my son's were not detached from their Father. They were not moving on with their lives or living in the day. They missed him tremendously and they were in a holding pattern. That last go around, for whatever reason, they needed to be able to let go and start to live their lives.
It took me a long time to come to that realization and then the gratefulness. Oh and by the way? The 3 C's- oh dear, I will tell you, honestly, I am no where near there yet. (where is the laugh button?) Nope, I have to admit, it sounds good to me at the time that peolple remind me of it. Then I will have a night dream or a daydream and think to myself. There must have been something I did or didn't do!! (sigh button?)
(((Abundance)))
That signature line of yours dear? The 3 C's.
I know it doesn't feel like it right now. Been there. But know what? Looking back at things later- I am grateful.
That signature line of yours dear? The 3 C's.
I know it doesn't feel like it right now. Been there. But know what? Looking back at things later- I am grateful.
Personally, I find the the C's- the hardest of anything I have heard or attempted to learn. That line was said with a sigh.
As for the gratefulness, it took me a long time to get there. I was full of the *stupid me's* and felt a great deal of shame. My greatest problem was, I felt that I had put my son's through another painful experience, another loss.
Looking back, my son's were not detached from their Father. They were not moving on with their lives or living in the day. They missed him tremendously and they were in a holding pattern. That last go around, for whatever reason, they needed to be able to let go and start to live their lives.
It took me a long time to come to that realization and then the gratefulness. Oh and by the way? The 3 C's- oh dear, I will tell you, honestly, I am no where near there yet. (where is the laugh button?) Nope, I have to admit, it sounds good to me at the time that peolple remind me of it. Then I will have a night dream or a daydream and think to myself. There must have been something I did or didn't do!! (sigh button?)
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Abundance, the difference between a bad day and a good day is usually about two days.
Hang in there, surround yourself with support....it does get better, I promise.
If you need to change your identity send me a PM and it can be arranged. Please don't let his bad behaviour drive you away from your support. He's not worth it.
Hugs
Hang in there, surround yourself with support....it does get better, I promise.
If you need to change your identity send me a PM and it can be arranged. Please don't let his bad behaviour drive you away from your support. He's not worth it.
Hugs
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