Update on us

Old 08-15-2008, 08:39 AM
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Update on us

Well, AH came home from rehab yesterday. I went in the morning to pick him up and support him in the "coffee cup hanging ceremony" (they hang their cup and in a year they come back. If they were sober for the year, they take it home, it not, it stays and it is a yearly event that continues. What made the hair stand up on my neck is the "special cups" one one wall with dates attached. These were addicts that died before their year was up because of their addictions).

So, AH is ver much the introvert. I was shocked and oh so proud to hear him make his speach. He had a clarity and calmness I have not seen, well, I don't think I have ever seen it. I was so proud. He has worked so hard. He has really put the effort in for his future too. He got his sponsor on the outside, he has his meetings set up, he enrolled in outpatient classes and has a therapist as well. Additionally, I have begun to get healthy too. I have my meetings set up, I have scheduled my therapist, I have my books (codependency no more, beyond codependency and an addict in the family, plus my 12 steps books). As a family, we will be continuing to go to family day on Sundays at the rehab were everyone pitches in for a bar-b-que and there is family sessions.

I haven't felt this peaceful and happy for a long time. Even though I am happy for AH, I am more happy for me. I now have the tools and the right mindset to make myself healthy and stop my obsession over him. I treated myself yesterday to a bunch of new plants and flowers to make over my entire front garden/flower beds. For the first time in years, I am truly taking care of myself and learning to love myself. I am taking care of myself emotionally, financially, spiritually and physically. I am setting myself free of obsessive behavior and obsessive thoughts as they are the root of my sickness of being a codependent.

Today, I am happy. Today, I am healthy. Today, I love me.:ghug3
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Old 08-15-2008, 09:33 AM
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What a great post!!!

I'm happy he seems to be doing really well, and wants recovery, but YOU sound fantastic!!!

Keep on working on you, and let him work his program....life is so much calmer when we do that.

Hugs and prayers!

Amy
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Old 08-15-2008, 09:47 AM
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I, also enjoyed your post and can hear the happiness in your words. Let your hubby do his work and you do yours and all may be well....enjoy!! Hugs, Bonnie
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Old 08-15-2008, 01:25 PM
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What a fantastic post! I remember when I was picking up my guy from his inpatient treatment center! It was SO exciting..... we were on this new path. Unfortunately, he took a turn. I had to use those tools that I learned while he was there what my part in this is. Unfortunately, he got back on the elevator and needs to keep going down. However, I got off. I am sticking to my boundaries..... and right now I can tell you how much safer I feel in doing so. The calm and the peace I now feel to know that I in no way will get in the way of him going down as far as he needs to go to stay on the path of recovery.

Yeah.... it hurt like hell to finally get to that point, but I'm there now and it's because of all of the tools I have learned.

For you..... stay in your recovery.... "keep coming back, because it does work when you work it"......

SO PROUD of YOU and your hubby! This is not easy..... it is probably one of the hardest things you have or ever will face in your life. Enjoy this time together..... Recovery is a beautiful dance!
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Old 08-15-2008, 03:05 PM
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So nice

You know what was wonderful? I have been so physically drained with my bone disease of my legs and chasing a 5 yr. old around and running back and forth to the rehab while taking care of a huge house on my own. (I am supposed to be on limited movement as my left leg is currently fractured and I have surgery scheduled in a little over a month. Yeah right. I had to mow my lawn and do all the cooking & cleaning while AH was in rehab).

Soo, the nice part was I just woke up. I drifted off to a little nap on my sofa with cartoons low on the tv, and happy little giggles from son now and then as he and AH was up in the office playing computer games together.

No stress, no worries, even my cocker spaniel who knows something's been up with me lately was happily curled at my feet. We drifted off to sleep for 2 whole hours. What a treat!

God has been very good to me today. He has smiled down on me, laid his hands on my shoulder and said you have done good. Now go rest. And I did to the sweetest music ever, my child's laughter.
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Old 08-15-2008, 03:14 PM
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I'm so happy for you! Your post was great and the outcome is a great positive story...Take care of yourself and continue with the peace in your heart, mind and soul.
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Old 08-15-2008, 03:31 PM
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Good to hear Happy Posts no and then. So happy you relaxed and slept and your little pooch knew you were happy. Yea!!!!!!
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Old 08-15-2008, 04:56 PM
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Originally Posted by GreenEyedGirl39 View Post
You know what was wonderful? I have been so physically drained with my bone disease of my legs and chasing a 5 yr. old around and running back and forth to the rehab while taking care of a huge house on my own. (I am supposed to be on limited movement as my left leg is currently fractured and I have surgery scheduled in a little over a month. Yeah right. I had to mow my lawn and do all the cooking & cleaning while AH was in rehab).

Soo, the nice part was I just woke up. I drifted off to a little nap on my sofa with cartoons low on the tv, and happy little giggles from son now and then as he and AH was up in the office playing computer games together.

No stress, no worries, even my cocker spaniel who knows something's been up with me lately was happily curled at my feet. We drifted off to sleep for 2 whole hours. What a treat!

God has been very good to me today. He has smiled down on me, laid his hands on my shoulder and said you have done good. Now go rest. And I did to the sweetest music ever, my child's laughter.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaw that is lovely! this is hope in hindsight ..... that has surfaced.

Very happy for you
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