Working on Healing
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Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Michigan
Posts: 6
Working on Healing
Hi everyone. I have not been here in awhile but I wanted to stop in and update. It has been 5 weeks since my son passed. I have been hanging in there. Some days better then others. The investigation is still open and they do know the person that the drug came from. They say charges will be filed but I am sure this is a long process. The investigation into the supplier and the girl that left him to die has been consuming me and much of my time is focused on that. My older son has had a very difficult time with losing his baby brother and has come to stay with us for awhile. It is nice having him close, and we do alot of talking and remincing. I do have to say that my older son is also an addict, but since losing my son, he has quit all drugs cold turkey. He is going on 3 weeks and is doing great. I am so proud of him but I am sad that it took losing his brother to make him see what drugs can do.
As if losing my son is not enough and the pain so deep and the memories of the funeral and losing him still so fresh in my head and heart, my husband and I lost his 13 year old nephew on June 24, exactly 30 days after my son passed. Wednesday is the funeral and I am having a real hard time. I want to be there for everyone but I am so afraid I will not be able to handle it. My husband understands but I want to be thee for everyone.
I thank you all for listening and for your words of advice and wisdom. I am hoping to be able to come here more often once things start settling down.:praying
As if losing my son is not enough and the pain so deep and the memories of the funeral and losing him still so fresh in my head and heart, my husband and I lost his 13 year old nephew on June 24, exactly 30 days after my son passed. Wednesday is the funeral and I am having a real hard time. I want to be there for everyone but I am so afraid I will not be able to handle it. My husband understands but I want to be thee for everyone.
I thank you all for listening and for your words of advice and wisdom. I am hoping to be able to come here more often once things start settling down.:praying
StrivingToThrive
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: san diego, ca
Posts: 425
((((Angel))))))
I have been thinking about you lately and praying for you. Wondering how you were doing and if you were getting any answers to your son's death that were bringing you a bit of peace.
I understand your struggle with your nephew's funeral.
After my sister died there were 3 more funerals within 6 months from young people close to my family.
Each time we went it was as if we were going through it ourselves all over again.
This was over 20 years ago when my sister and I were in our early 20's and its still very hard for my parents or anyone in our family to attend a funeral of someone young.
So many feelings get opened up.
There were times I just couldn't go. I was too raw and teetering mentally.
Other times I needed to go as it helped in my grieving steps even as it had me tumbling emotionally because I knew what the other family felt and needed at that time, and I wanted to be there.
Sometimes grieving with others helped me with my process too.
No one can ever truly understand and know the feeling until they go through something like this.
You have to do what's best for you right now and even at that moment. You'll know if its right for you. But be easy on yourself with any decisions right now. Do what feels best for your recovery right now.:praying
I have been thinking about you lately and praying for you. Wondering how you were doing and if you were getting any answers to your son's death that were bringing you a bit of peace.
I understand your struggle with your nephew's funeral.
After my sister died there were 3 more funerals within 6 months from young people close to my family.
Each time we went it was as if we were going through it ourselves all over again.
This was over 20 years ago when my sister and I were in our early 20's and its still very hard for my parents or anyone in our family to attend a funeral of someone young.
So many feelings get opened up.
There were times I just couldn't go. I was too raw and teetering mentally.
Other times I needed to go as it helped in my grieving steps even as it had me tumbling emotionally because I knew what the other family felt and needed at that time, and I wanted to be there.
Sometimes grieving with others helped me with my process too.
No one can ever truly understand and know the feeling until they go through something like this.
You have to do what's best for you right now and even at that moment. You'll know if its right for you. But be easy on yourself with any decisions right now. Do what feels best for your recovery right now.:praying
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((angel)))
I'm glad you checked in...I've also been praying for you and your family.
I agree with cece - we went through several funerals in a short amount of time and it seemed like every time I went to one, I was also grieving for the others.
I'm sure your family would understand if you don't go to the funeral, if that's what you decide. To me, I can't really tell you every person who went to my mom's funeral, but I can tell you every single person who was there for me AFTERWARD! Although it's a horrible thing to have in common (losing your son's), you and the nephew's family may be able to help each other with the grief.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
I'm glad you checked in...I've also been praying for you and your family.
I agree with cece - we went through several funerals in a short amount of time and it seemed like every time I went to one, I was also grieving for the others.
I'm sure your family would understand if you don't go to the funeral, if that's what you decide. To me, I can't really tell you every person who went to my mom's funeral, but I can tell you every single person who was there for me AFTERWARD! Although it's a horrible thing to have in common (losing your son's), you and the nephew's family may be able to help each other with the grief.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Hackettstown, NJ
Posts: 692
Praying for you...
Everyone would understand if you didn't go to your nephew's funeral, so its really a matter of what you want to do - what you think is best.
thanks for sharing that your older son is clean now- perhaps some light for you in the midst of so much darkness- I am especially praying for him that he finds recovery (meetings?) for himself and continues on the path....
Everyone would understand if you didn't go to your nephew's funeral, so its really a matter of what you want to do - what you think is best.
thanks for sharing that your older son is clean now- perhaps some light for you in the midst of so much darkness- I am especially praying for him that he finds recovery (meetings?) for himself and continues on the path....
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