Call from E.R.

Old 06-12-2008, 06:25 AM
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Call from E.R.

Good morning all,
Son's GF called us late last night, he was in E.R.
She gave the phone to him, and he said he took Valium, and Klonopin, because he was so "stressed" out. He sounded totally out of it.
He asked me to come to hospital last night, but I told him he was in good hands, and in the right place, and did not go.

His court sentencing comes up the end of the month, and he will be sentenced to between 2 to 10 years, and he is now in "panic" mode.

He was released this a.m. and called Mr. Moose, and they spoke awhile, Mr. Moose once again pointing out the positive sides of life, and encouraging son to find different friends, and get sober. Son has heard it a zillion times.
Mr. Moose told me later this a.m. that he thinks son sounds suicidal. His cell is turned off, so I have no way to call him back.

I am going to compose a letter today to send to his lawyer, to give to the judge, telling him of my sons history, although I don't think it will help much, you can never be sure.

Sometimes I feel my faith slipping, that he will ever seek the recovery road. This fella is going to be 35 years old in September.

Son told me a while back, that if he tells them, in prison, that he has "mental problems", like ADHD, they will medicate him with sinequin, which makes everyone a zombie. he said they give it to everyone, it's a standard.

(And a little bit of a vent, please...)
I get so darned irritated because no one seems to want to help these "lost" souls. Just toss them in and throw away the key.
When they're released, there isn't any help available, they can't find a job, because of their "felony" status, no one will hire them, and the chain starts again.. selling or dealing drugs to may money to survive.
But, then again, I'm sure, if son had goals of "sobriety, and recovery" help is there if he searched for it.

Okay, all better now, thank you...

Love and hugs to all....
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Old 06-12-2008, 08:49 AM
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(((Moose)))

I'm so very, very sorry....

I know exactly what you're going through...
And I know that vent, and those frustrations...

My career counselor tells me that for people like Trevor, (and your son), he now suggests that they go to another country to find work. Even to jump probation if they have to!

Yep. There is nothing for them here. With the economy the way it is, and getting worse; their felony status; and the lack of programs available, he tells them that other countries, that are developing in status is the place to go.

Can you imagine! The American Dream is available for everyone *but* for those citizens who have made mistakes. There is nothing for them here.

This man has been doing his job as a career counselor for @ 20 years now. He's seen it all. It's dried up. He said to go to India; the Middle East; China; anywhere where they need people who speak English. They will get a job in a heart beat, and be able to do well.

In another country.
Not in the USA...
It honestly made me sick...

I pray your son is fine, and continues to be ok.

Shalom!
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Old 06-12-2008, 09:30 AM
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Sending prayers. I am kind of struggling a bit too right now. Insurance didn't pay much toward daughter's rehab and there just are not a lot of resources for those who don't have the money. Hugs, Marle
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Old 06-12-2008, 09:55 AM
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Hi Diane, I think we all live in fear for so many hours of the day. I'm sorry your son ended up in the ER. Your right about the help!! And when they do do counciling I'm not so sure they get enough of it. If they don't have insurance of some kind they are turned away. It's so heartbreaking. My hearts with you sweety. Sounds like your hubby is alot like mine. Guess we really need them. Take care of yourself and I'll be thinking about you. Smiles, Bonnie
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Old 06-12-2008, 02:13 PM
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Sending you hugs and prayers. It must be hard not knowing what your son is doing. I know I how I worry about mine and know what it is like. Stay strong and turn to your HP for the extra strength you need right now. If you feel better writing the letter for your son do it.
Good luck and sending hugs and prayers from another mom
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Old 06-12-2008, 02:47 PM
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(((Moose)))

Hugs and prayers for you, Mr. Moose, and your son.

I've been dealing with the "felony" thing, too. My vent is that I don't really HAVE a felony, but that's what it says on my "rap sheet" and the state is in no hurry to remedy it. I've gotten a lawyer, but I still sit here, a convicted felon!

Not only does it hamper my hunt for another job, but I can't even get a place to live...no apts. in the Atlanta area will rent if you have a felony.

I KNOW this is all consequences of my actions, but darn...can't a person get a break when they're busting their butt to do everything right?!

Okay, venting done..back to my gratitude list

Keeping you and the Moose family in my prayers!

Amy
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Old 06-12-2008, 03:53 PM
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I am so sorry - it was always something with my ASs when they were using - I remember how I used to hate those phone calls. Almost hated the phone calls worse than not knowing where one of them was for months. Wanting to do the mother thing - whatever that is - and knowing that my first instinct is always wrong. You did the right thing - I love the words, you are in a good place.

I just hang onto that God has a plan - and I need to sometimes stay out of the way. Love from a distance. So very hard!

Prayers and love coming your way.

Love in recovery,
Jody Hepler

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Old 06-12-2008, 05:36 PM
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(((((Moose)))))

I am so sorry for your son. Your son, my brother, somebody's dad and someone else's husband, wife daughter, mom, aunt, uncle, nephew,niece, grandchild they are people with problems that mostly prison is not going to help.

These people are why I think dope should be legal. This war on drugs has caused more damage than just about anything I can think of in this country. If people came out of prison able to work and return to help themselves and their families that would be all well and good. That is not the norm though. The norm is they wind up going back out because prison breaks people's spirit and it is not a place to send a sick person.

Prayers going out for you and your son and everyone else and the loved ones who struggle with addiction.
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Old 06-12-2008, 05:49 PM
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OH Moose I am so sorry. I just saw this.

It's a powerless thing... no matter what he does or doesn't do, you know the drill: you didn't cause it, you can't control it and you can't cure it. Knowing all that, it's still scary when it's your kid and I am sending big BIG hugs your way.

As for jobs etc, perhaps that's an area of service work that some can explore. Many just need a second chance but can't get one.

Hugs my friend

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Old 06-12-2008, 06:57 PM
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I'm sending hugs too, Moose, this is the scary part and it's hard to be a mom and let go when we are afraid for them.

Mental health and addiction recovery go hand in hand here in Canada and they clearly recognize the need for treatment of what they call "Concurrent Disorders" meaning addiction and mental disorders combined (and at this point they don't worry about which came first, they just treat both sides).

That said, the jails and prisons here are just as bad as where you are. You'd think that if the idea of incarceration was to rehabilitate them that they would offer adequate rehabilitation facilities and care. I think the time will come here where jails will work with outside services to get the help for the prisoners who really need it, but it's a slow process and doesn't help those imprisoned now.

My prayers go out for your son, Moose, that he can get the help he needs. And special prayers for you and Mr. Moose, this is no picnic for either one of you.

Hugs
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Old 06-12-2008, 07:09 PM
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He did leave a number with my mother.

I tried to call him today, he knows I've called,
and he hasn't called me back. (good thing...?
bad thing...?)
Not sure what I could possibly say,
anyway, other than I love you...


Trusting in my H.P.
and having lots and lots of acceptance....
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Old 06-12-2008, 07:11 PM
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((((Moose))))

"I love you" is always good.

Shalom!
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Old 06-12-2008, 07:11 PM
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((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((MOOSE))))))))) )))))))))))))))))))
I can only imagine what it is like watching a 34 yr. old son's unmanageble life all this time. It has to be hard knowing long-term prison is his bottom.

But he is still alive. Where there is life, there is hope.
When they spend their life marching toward death, life is an accomplishment.

I am learning not to ask WHY .
Prayers for your son who still suffers with the horrible affliction of addiction.
May he be free one day.
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Old 06-12-2008, 07:28 PM
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Originally Posted by historyteach View Post
((((Moose))))

"I love you" is always good.
Thats always been, and will always be one of my favorites too.

Keeping you and your family in my prayers (((Moosie)))
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Old 06-12-2008, 07:35 PM
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Praying for all of you, Moose. It really is such a sad thing how we as a society have failed our lost souls. Prison is far from rehabiliation...and it is just maddening that even when the dollars and cents side of it (for those who can not find compassion and have to see it only in that way) proves that we are just pouring good money after bad and tripling our prison population due to the way we "treat" addiciton, nothing changes.

I will just keep praying and yes, I love you is about the most caring thing you can do.
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Old 06-12-2008, 08:45 PM
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A recovery mom told me what SHE says to her AD ... as often as possible.

"I love you SO much
You are so smart,
And I know you're going to find your way."

Pretty much says it all, doesn't it?

Hugs my friend
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Old 06-12-2008, 11:28 PM
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Feeling the frustration, sadness, anger for you and with you....

I think we as a society need to make up our minds; is it a disease or a moral failing? Are they ill patients, or are they criminals? We (society) treat them as both simultaneously and it just doesn't make sense.

but I still must believe that God does know what he is doing, and also where there is life there is hope (as prev. posters said).
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Old 06-13-2008, 07:37 AM
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The only thing I know to say is like others have said. . .

I'm praying for you, Mr Moose and your son

praying that somehow, someway your son will see the glimmer of hope in recovery, that he will grab that straw and hold onto it - that the Judge, lawyers, prison officials will see the person not just another case file - to go above and beyond to help this young man get the help he truly needs to live a sober life.

and prayers of comfort for his Mom, who is such a brave woman but needs to feel her HP's presence surrounding her.

HUGS,
Rita
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Old 06-13-2008, 09:05 AM
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Thats why I just have to take a break from here sometimes, it is just heartbreaking. And there is nothing we can do to help...it just sucks. I am sending prayers and hugs too for you and your family. Take care, Michelle
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Old 06-13-2008, 09:16 AM
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Hi Moose, Hope things are OK at your end and that you and Mr. Moose are taking care of yourselves. This is all too much to handle sometimes. Happy one day and down the next !! Prayers and positive energy coming your way...Smiles, Bonnie
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