Addicted to SR
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 1,287
Addicted to SR
Hi all....
Its only been a week since I found SR and I have to say I think I am addicted (tongue firmly in cheek)! I have been on vacation this week and it seems every spare moment I have, I log onto SR to see new threads and read about others going through very similar situations. I have never been very 'open' about my personal life, and with the problems I've had with my AH I isolate myself even more. But here, I feel I can be totally honest without judgment or embarassment or shame. I can't tell you how liberating that feels. I know that I will eventually need to do more than post online, but for today I feel so much more connected to life. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for that.
As for my AH, he is saying he wants to be clean and that he wants to do what he has to for me and our marriage. He has a 'plan' that includes detoxing from meds, NA meetings, and getting back to the gym. But I know for me, I can't rely on his promises anymore. I told him that he needs to do what he needs to do, but that I am going to do what I need to do for me. If he really wants to be clean and sober, he has to do it, but I am not going to put my life on hold for it. I hope I can be strong and follow through with everything I want to do.
Love, Rica
Its only been a week since I found SR and I have to say I think I am addicted (tongue firmly in cheek)! I have been on vacation this week and it seems every spare moment I have, I log onto SR to see new threads and read about others going through very similar situations. I have never been very 'open' about my personal life, and with the problems I've had with my AH I isolate myself even more. But here, I feel I can be totally honest without judgment or embarassment or shame. I can't tell you how liberating that feels. I know that I will eventually need to do more than post online, but for today I feel so much more connected to life. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart for that.
As for my AH, he is saying he wants to be clean and that he wants to do what he has to for me and our marriage. He has a 'plan' that includes detoxing from meds, NA meetings, and getting back to the gym. But I know for me, I can't rely on his promises anymore. I told him that he needs to do what he needs to do, but that I am going to do what I need to do for me. If he really wants to be clean and sober, he has to do it, but I am not going to put my life on hold for it. I hope I can be strong and follow through with everything I want to do.
Love, Rica
On a tear
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Volcano Country!
Posts: 3,221
Maybe as a good "next step" you can check out some face to face Alanon or Naranon meetings? They are similar in the lack of being judged, truly understanding members and lots of experience to draw on.
It is a tough row to hoe, but you are on the right track! I wish you the best.
(((hugs)))
It is a tough row to hoe, but you are on the right track! I wish you the best.
(((hugs)))
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 1,287
Thanks Bigsis, as a matter of fact, going to a meeting is my goal for next week. I am hoping that reaching out will enable me to find some support with what I am going through, since I don't talk to family or friends about it....yet.
Thanks again....
Rica
Thanks again....
Rica
Member
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: To the North
Posts: 1,086
Meetings will feel great. Once you start opening up, it's a huge relief. I know when I finally let it all out, what I needed to do for me "crystallized". Wish it had given me the "magic wand of wisdom and answers" too (of course), but being honest about what my life has been and where I wanted to go was the first and biggest step on MY path.
Good for you sticking to your boundaries and it sounds like you're already detaching in a healthy way.
Take care of yourself on your journey!
Good for you sticking to your boundaries and it sounds like you're already detaching in a healthy way.
Take care of yourself on your journey!
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 213
I agree with loving this place and reading so many similar stories and not feeling the need to pretend that everything is fine.
I also feel that way about the al-anon meetings. It was wonderful to meet people who can understand how isolating it can be to be in a relationship with an addict. And to meet people who don't judge me and they ask me how *I* am doing and I feel comfortable giving an honest answer. Meetings have been a lifeline for me.
I also feel that way about the al-anon meetings. It was wonderful to meet people who can understand how isolating it can be to be in a relationship with an addict. And to meet people who don't judge me and they ask me how *I* am doing and I feel comfortable giving an honest answer. Meetings have been a lifeline for me.
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