Language of Letting Go - March 18
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Language of Letting Go - March 18
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Safety
One of the long-term effects of living in a dysfunctional family - as children or adults - is that we don't feel safe.
Much of what we call codependency happens because we don't feel safe in relationships. This can cause us to control, obsess, or focus on the other person, while neglecting ourselves or shutting down our feelings.
We can learn to make ourselves feel safe and comfortable, as part of a nurturing, loving attitude toward ourselves.
Often, we get a feeling of safety and comfort when we attend Twelve Step meetings or support groups. Being with a friend or doing something nice for ourselves helps us feel protected and loved. Sometimes, reaching out to another person helps us feel safe. Prayer and meditation help us affirm that our Higher Power cares for us.
We are safe now. We can relax. Perhaps others haven't been there for us in a consistent, trustworthy way, but we are learning to be there for ourselves.
Today, I will concentrate on making myself feel safe and comfortable.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Safety
One of the long-term effects of living in a dysfunctional family - as children or adults - is that we don't feel safe.
Much of what we call codependency happens because we don't feel safe in relationships. This can cause us to control, obsess, or focus on the other person, while neglecting ourselves or shutting down our feelings.
We can learn to make ourselves feel safe and comfortable, as part of a nurturing, loving attitude toward ourselves.
Often, we get a feeling of safety and comfort when we attend Twelve Step meetings or support groups. Being with a friend or doing something nice for ourselves helps us feel protected and loved. Sometimes, reaching out to another person helps us feel safe. Prayer and meditation help us affirm that our Higher Power cares for us.
We are safe now. We can relax. Perhaps others haven't been there for us in a consistent, trustworthy way, but we are learning to be there for ourselves.
Today, I will concentrate on making myself feel safe and comfortable.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Often, we get a feeling of safety and comfort when we attend Twelve Step meetings or support groups. Being with a friend or doing something nice for ourselves helps us feel protected and loved. Sometimes, reaching out to another person helps us feel safe. Prayer and meditation help us affirm that our Higher Power cares for us.
Just for today I will be grateful for inner peace, feeling safe and knowing that no matter what the day hands me, all is well.
Hugs
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 35
What stood out to me was control in relationships. I am quite enjoying single life being separated from AH. I am sort of interested in meeting someone else and will chat and talk to potential suitors as it may be. But when they ask me out on a date I then find myself out of my comfort zone and say no. I think it could be my way of controlling! Lure them in and then shoot them down? Just a thought for me to ponder on...
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