tjpa

Anyone on here in this situation? My 29 year old daughter along with her 2 daughters live with us. she is 4 weeks sober.(mostly alcohol and some cocaine) she just lost her second teaching job which prompted her visit to a treatment center.
the 2 beautiful granddaughters are why we have "enabled" so long.
anyone in a similar situation with grandchildren? thanks

Spiritual Seeker

When there are grandkids, the options are different.
How wonderful that you are providing a home and some stability for your grand-daughters. Maybe, your daughter will be able to stay in recovery this time.

mjpaao

(((tjpa))
I'm not in your situation, but I am a grammy. Good for you to provide a home for your grand children. Not everyone could do that, I know I would find it difficult if one of my kids and their children moved back in with me. I so hope your daughter finds her way. Your grand daughters are very lucky to have such a caring grandmother.

puddinface

Yep...here I am. I am 48 yrs old and grandma to a 4 year old. Helping my son (who became a father at 20) raise him. My son also has full custody and so he lives with us. (Mother is not in the picture much at all) It is a joy to know that I am giving him stability and the love he so deserves. He is a joy. It's hard work sometimes because he is with me all the time, but well worth it. The love I get back is so incredible. I love him like hes my own.

greeteachday

I'm not in your position but I do understand how those kids can change the dynamics. Thank you for being there for your grandaughters. I do not think providing a home and safety is enabling in this situation and that you can still establish boundaries for you. Your daughter still can handle her stuff (working recovery, debts, whatever responsibilities you ask of her, etc.) while you provide a safe environment for her and her children. One thing my daughter told me really helped her rebuild the self confidence she lost in addiction, was starting to assume responsibility for her own things...all kinds of things. As she learned to face consequences, budget, work recovery, etc. she learned that she wasn't a total failure and she was capable of much more than she gave herself credit for. Hugs