I'm so happy I found this place

Old 03-12-2008, 08:49 AM
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I'm so happy I found this place

Two weeks ago, my husband revealed to me his addiction to cocaine. I had no idea. No idea that he sniffed coke. No idea he was high on coke during some of our trips to church. No idea that the straws he used to snort were hidden underneath our bathroom sink. Our life was a life of complete deceit.

At this point, my husband has lost three jobs in 4 months. I'm attempting to hold us down by myself but I'm going crazy.

Last week I blew up at him and told him I wanted a divorce (we've only been married 7 months) and I thought about it and decided to try to work things out. He left anyway and went down south to his dad's house. I want him back... I hate the craziness of our life but I want him back so much. He was a good husband... or rather, a good ass liar.

I'm hoping this board will allow me to release some issues that I can't discuss with anyone out of embarassment and shame.
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Old 03-12-2008, 08:53 AM
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Welcome! I'm glad you are here! Feel free to share whatever you want to.....there are plenty of kind folks here that understand what you are going through. :ghug2
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Old 03-12-2008, 12:02 PM
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Alabaster you have come to the right place. I welcome you with open arms. Unfortunately I relate all to well to your situation as I am in the same place you are with my boyfriend. It is a nasty battle I am not going to lie. I hope you find comfort here as I have and continue to. If you need someone, please do not hesitate to contact me.

Thoughts and prayers,
Cate
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Old 03-12-2008, 12:24 PM
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There is no reason to be embarrassed or shamed of your husbands addiction. You will find that your true friends will support you in your time of need. I am fairly new here also (AH is addicted to painkillers and in rehab) but it did help a bunch to read the sticky tabs at the top of the message board. Hugs
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Old 03-12-2008, 09:44 PM
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Hi Alabasterbox and welcome. I, too have an AH and I know all too well how you feel. Sometimes I feel our lives were a big lie. I didn't know him at all. He is in recovery now, for the third time but his lies have destroyed our marriage. Yet, I still want him. I have not forgiven him yet, but I am trying to understand. I am trying to find a connection with him that I once had and trying start over in a new place. It is very hard to do, but I keep praying. Please don't be embarrassed. You will find the support and hope you need here on SR.
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Old 03-12-2008, 09:55 PM
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Alabaster,

Welcome to Soberrecovery! This is a wonderful site with many wise people- I am the mother of a 21 year old addict. Read the stickys at the top and consider finding an alanon or naranon meeting where you live.

Hugs and prayers,
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Old 03-17-2008, 01:41 PM
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hi, my husband's been a cocaine addict for 13 years now I only found out about it about two and half years ago. We have been married six and a half years. I didn't know the signs i was so oblivious to the obvious. We have been going back and forth for those two and a half years about his addiction and how it is affecting our marriage he tried rehab and tried quitting on his own but hes still add it we have fought too much i can no longer take it i have threatened him with divorce and taking away the kids but he would act like he was cleaning him self up then after a few weeks it would start up again, i have decided i cannot be his enabler any longer i have filed for divorce and have kicked him out of the house i too want the man i married back but since hes been doing drugs since before we met i quess its wishful thinking don't be afraid to go to family or friends you will see they will do anything they can to help i don't know what i would do without them...i just hope the best for my husband i know he does love me and the childres its just right now his disease is winning.....good luck.
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Old 03-17-2008, 02:15 PM
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Welcome to SR. It has saved my sanity many times. I find it so helpful to read what others are going through and have gone through. I have a AH too. We are seperated right now. It is sad, disappointing, confusing, maddening...
read the stickys, keep coming back!
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