carltex

I was talking to my wifes best friend (recovering alchoholic 10 yrs.) and she dropped what she calls a pink elephant in my living room. My wife has been sleeping all weekend for about the last ten months. You're probably saying why haven't you done something. I have been just walking around it I guess. Her friend told me in confidence that she thinks she is hooked on vicodin which she has been getting from one of her co-workers. I had no clue she was doing that. I never took her for the type to do that so I thought maybe it was something else. She is always complaining she can't sleep during the week and says she is catching up on the weekend. She also suffers from constipation which is common to pain pill users I hear. There are other issues in our house that I know depress her not to mention menopause. My stepson has been in trouble for the last 15 years with drugs and alchohol ( 4 dui's, 2 in TX and 2 in OH) and his wife divorced him last year. I'm not a very confrontational person but I guess this has gotten to the point of having to say something and hope she doesn't blow up on me. Anyone have any words of wisdom?

hope213

welcome to s.r. you have come to a place where there are lots of people who care & understand. you can confront your wife about this but just like she can do nothing to keep her son from using you can do nothing to keep her clean either. she has got to want to stop. find a naranon meeting to go to. there is lots of support for you there. maybe she will find a meeting for herself. n.a. has a lot of support for her. i am sorry all of this is happening. i will say a prayer for you,her & her son. keep coming back.

Ann

I just want to welcome you too.

Sleeping all weekend every weekend for a long period of time is more than "just tired". With all that is going on, she may be depressed and depressed people often escape in sleep...or...she may be taking a drug.

I'd take what was said to you seriously and just ask your wife about it. Keep in mind that people using drugs often lie about it, but at least it would get it out in the open where the fact that there is a problem is no longer ignored.

Also, a visit to her doctor might help in case it is something else. Perhaps you could talk to him/her about your concerns so that the doctor doesn't just prescribe something that would make the problem worse.

You've come to a good place where we truly do understand, even suspicions of drug use often have some validity.

Stick around, take a read of the "sticky" posts at the top of this forum and make yourself comfortable.

Again, welcome to SR.

Hugs

marle

Being the mother of an addicted daughter I would say that maybe your wife is trying to escape the pain by numbing herself to the outside world. She sounds like she is self medicating which is common with addicts. I do not take any substances but I have seriously thought about it because the pain of having someone you love in addiction is a really hard thing to go through. This does not excuse what she is doing but may offer you a glimpse into her problems. Also I know for me menopause has its own set of problems. Can you get her to go see a doctor? That may be a good point to start. But above all know that you did not cause her problems and you can't cure or control them. That has to come from her. Hugs, Marle

carltex

I talked to the wifes friend this morning and she suggested going to alanon meetings. I guess I will have to try to get her to go for having to deal with her son and maybe she will realize something about herself while she is there. Thanks for the kind words.

ladyamalthea

worst case scenario, why not go to alanon yourself if she won't go? They can be a great place to get support and info...

hello-kitty

Yes. Sorry you are in such a situation. I think the alanon meetings would be good for you to go to for your problem. Maybe they can help you decide whether or not you want to confront your wife over your suspicions and if you decide to, how you are going to do it.