worried4

Hi everyone. I just earlier this week- you might remember my first post. Since then I have found out some new information and have realized that the problem is far worse than I imagined.

I went and talked to my boyfriend's friends and they told me that they were worried to. That he has been using heroin again after his OD and that he was addicted before his OD (I thought it was his first time trying it). Now he has been calling them asking to borrow money and what not. He even told one of them that he was using heroin again and he was scaring himself and wanted him to hold him accountable. His friends and I went to his family and we've set up an intervention for this sunday. I have never been so nervous in my life. I feel physically sick about all of this and I have no idea how he is going to react, but if he wants to we are going to support him and put him into a detox program and then a short term residential program.

I would love to hear any tips you all have on how to get through to him during the intervention. I am so scared he is going to flip out and run away and wind up dead.

thanks.

marle

Interventions can be tricky. Your best bet is to have someone that is a professional and knows what they are doing. Remember that even if he agrees to go to rehab, there is no guarantee. It is only a chance. Hugs, Marle

1963comet

I think the most important part is him wanting the help. Ask him if he remembers how life was before he started to use drugs. I know I was a pretty happy teenager before I got into the drugs and drinking.

Drugs can take a persons life over and you become blind to what they are doing to you. Tell him that he does not have to be a slave to drugs that people can help.

I am from the other side of the fence but thought this might help. Hope you don't mind.

Troubledone

I went to all manner of lengths to manage the intervention we did for my niece, right down to a professional.

She refused treatment at that time, but there was nothing more anyone could have done.

I was sure that it would work, but it didn't at that time. The good news is, two years later she's sober and doing well (long story).

The only advice I can give is that there is a difference between supporting recovery and rescuing and controlling. Do your best, pray and trust your HP for the outcome.

In all endeavors of great import, faith is required for peace of mind.

Prayers that your intervention is successful and that he accepts the help that is offered.

Spiritual Seeker

good luck.
There's nothing to be scared about.
An intervention is just a loving way for friends/family to tell the addict there is nothing they won't do to help him get sober and there is nothing they will do to help him cont. to kill yourself.

greeteachday

Unfortunately there is no magic solution to make him want help. I think just being yourself, letting him know you love him and you don't want to see drugs ruin his life and that you support him in efforts to seek recovery is the best you can do. That and pray. Let us know how things go and don't forget to take care of you too~!

Kindeyes

I remember that sick feeling leading up to my A son's intervention. I hope you do have a professional managing the intervention--we couldn't have handled it without the interventionist. I spoke from my heart. Most importantly I laid down my bottom line.

Immediately after the intervention (about 16 months ago), our son did agree to go to treatment. However, he has since relapsed.

I explained to him the other day that the intervention was for ME too. I needed to know that I had done everything I could to help him. The treatment center gave him the tools he needed to stay clean and sober. I feel good about that. I know that HE knows what he needs to do. Whether or not he does it is now between him and his HP.

My thoughts are with you as you go through this process. It is frightening but it is an act of love.

worried4

Thanks for all of your support. I just got back from the intervention. It wasn't a formal one, it was just me, his mom, dad, and sister. At first he got upset and denied that he had a problem, but after about 20 minutes of talking he has agreed to go for an assessment. He has agreed to do a detox or residential program if they feel that it is necessary. We are going at 9am tomorrow morning. I feel like it went really well, but I'm not satisfied like I had hoped. He told us he has been using heroin for 2 1/2 years or so. He feels like he can quit on his own, but he will go to treatment to an assessment to appease us. His sister and her baby are staying with us tonight so I am not alone with him. I am starting with narcanon this week. I am definitely a codependent and I need help getting through this, too. I am really relieved that he didn't just run away and refuse to talk to us. I guess this is the first step of a very long process. I just hope he can get through it and that I can get through it.

Thanks for all of your help.

CarolD

All my best for a positive outcome