SerenitySeaker

My AH left for FL yesterday. He doesn't know that when he comes back I will be gone having taken our pets and my belongings with me. I can no longer live with someone who looks me in the eye, lies, and thinks it's a normal acceptable way to be.

I started packing last night. It was overwhelming and sad but this board has reminded me that no matter how great it is a house is just four walls but my heart and soul are inside me.

Before my AH left he had acquired a stash of ADHD medication to keep him going on his long ride. When I saw it in his things I thought about flushing them down the toilet but to what end? This is his journey and I can't control it.

This morning I woke up and I turned it over to God. My husband is on a slippery slope and I just asked God to watch over him and help him in whatever journey he is supposed to be on right now. I asked for strength and the ability to believe that this is all happening for a reason.

Just feeling a little sad I guess and needed to share.

greeteachday

Making that decision is sad, but joyful too. I think it is a strange combination of relief, anxiety yet anticipation for all that life will now bring plus grief for the loved one we have to leave behind; for the memories of better times before addiction. You are doing the best thing for both of you and your strength is awesome. It's okay to feel sad, I think we all understand that and I'm glad you are sharing it. Please be extra gentle with yourself and take some time out of the packing and moving to just have some "me" time. Hugs and prayers.

duet_4-8

I am in the midst of packing up 23 years of my and my children's lives, too. We will soon be leaving the house we have called home for all their lives. But it really is only four walls-even though it's hard to move on. It's sad to watch someone slide down that slope, but in the end the only one we can take care of is ourself. Sending hugs and prayers to you!

HurtingDad

I've only known the issues of dealing with an AS. From what I've read on this forum having an AH or AW, while it shares common threads, have its own unique problems.

To SerenitySeaker and duet 4-8 best wishes on your moves. As others have said, take some 'me' time, and be strong.

Prayers....

Ann

From another mom who hasn't walked in your shoes, comes a bucket of hugs, lots of prayers and new bunny slippers to wear walking beside you.

You have children to protect, financial burdens to bear and I admire so much the courage you all show.

God bless the child and God bless their mamas.

Hugs

rahsue

I agree with hurting dad, it's my son thats my addict. I wish you both peace and contentment.

splendra

I hear ya ((((SS)))) I wish your H would stop in NC and take my H with him. I know the bitter sweetness of it all be gentle with yourself right now.