Can you suggest a book?
Power is not having to respond
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Wabbit Hole
Posts: 1,923
Can you suggest a book?
I am always reading self help books on different personalities.
I am struggling to find a GOOD one on narcissistic people.
I would like to find a book that doesn't just explain what it is. After all, it isn't hard to spot someone who's narcissistic. I would like to know the best way to respond to such a person.I have one heck of a prima donna narcissistic supervisor under me at work. She causes everyone so much stress.
My mother is another. She may not be a textbook case, but definately has NPD tendancies.
I thought if I could get some ideas on how to handle this personality, I could relieve some of my own stress.
If you can't think of good reading, perhaps you could tell me how YOU deal with this kind of person and how it works for you.
Thanks for any input.
I am struggling to find a GOOD one on narcissistic people.
I would like to find a book that doesn't just explain what it is. After all, it isn't hard to spot someone who's narcissistic. I would like to know the best way to respond to such a person.I have one heck of a prima donna narcissistic supervisor under me at work. She causes everyone so much stress.
My mother is another. She may not be a textbook case, but definately has NPD tendancies.
I thought if I could get some ideas on how to handle this personality, I could relieve some of my own stress.
If you can't think of good reading, perhaps you could tell me how YOU deal with this kind of person and how it works for you.
Thanks for any input.
Don't get undies in a bunch
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: South Shore MA
Posts: 7,120
Narcissistic people... just make everything be all about them.
You need to correct your co-worker?
" I have an idea that may make things go smoother for you, maybe try this and see what happens."
Or ask their opinion with you giving the facts as you want them seen.
"What do you thing of this? Do you think this would work well?"
You need to correct your co-worker?
" I have an idea that may make things go smoother for you, maybe try this and see what happens."
Or ask their opinion with you giving the facts as you want them seen.
"What do you thing of this? Do you think this would work well?"
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
Sorry Wascally, no book suggestions but I would be interested. I've had to deal with someone with narcistic tendencies in the workplace too but he has some redeeming qualities. I try to focus on those and when I have to, I detach as much as possible. The drama and the all about me part is just exhausting and difficult to deal with when we're trying to get work done. I limit conversation so i don't get myself frustrated. Some days I have more patience with it than others and I've learn to know when to stay away because I am not in the right mindframe for the stress. I imagine it is difficult for you to detach if this person reports to you. I hope someone has better ideas that i could learn from as well. Hugs
Member
Join Date: May 2007
Location: here and now
Posts: 1,291
Well, this is a good book for dealing with people in general...."Nonviolent Communication"--by Marshall B. Rosenberg.
Amazon.com: Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Create Your Life, Your Relationships, and Your World in Harmony with Your Values (Nonviolent Communication Guides): Books: Marshall B. Rosenberg,Arun Gandhi
I had this book for a counceling class and tried his technique for dealing with difficult people and it really does work!
Amazon.com: Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Create Your Life, Your Relationships, and Your World in Harmony with Your Values (Nonviolent Communication Guides): Books: Marshall B. Rosenberg,Arun Gandhi
I had this book for a counceling class and tried his technique for dealing with difficult people and it really does work!
Power is not having to respond
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Wabbit Hole
Posts: 1,923
Thanks greet and best.
I like generalized responses.
Like when you're talking to the constant complainer. NOthing stops them, but a good response I found is, "Gee, I don't know how you manage with all those problems".
You know, things like this help me. Responses to their drama. I have to interact with the girl, and she gets in my face! I back away and continue in a calm manner, but she is on a power trip from hell. She reported me to the next level up and I was called to a meeting.
Turns out, every single thing she complained about was so pathetic, immature and quite hysterical! Typical of the self absorbed.
The thing is she is a genious at handling her department,so I don't want to jeopardize her placement with our company! Arrrgh!
So, learning to cope and how to deal with this personality could land me back in the world of sane people!
I like generalized responses.
Like when you're talking to the constant complainer. NOthing stops them, but a good response I found is, "Gee, I don't know how you manage with all those problems".
You know, things like this help me. Responses to their drama. I have to interact with the girl, and she gets in my face! I back away and continue in a calm manner, but she is on a power trip from hell. She reported me to the next level up and I was called to a meeting.
Turns out, every single thing she complained about was so pathetic, immature and quite hysterical! Typical of the self absorbed.
The thing is she is a genious at handling her department,so I don't want to jeopardize her placement with our company! Arrrgh!
So, learning to cope and how to deal with this personality could land me back in the world of sane people!
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 4
My Bloody Life: The Making of a Latin King - The story of how a young grows up on the streets of chicago. He originally aspires to be a baseball player. After being raped and abused by his family he turns to the Latin King's. He talks about how he used to aspire to be a baseball player, and how he became a Drug Dealing/Addicted Latin King. Its a truly intresting how a young boy known as 'Rey' becomes Lil Loco of the Latin King's and goes from playing baseball after school to dealing coke on the corner. This story takes you through his childhood and initiation to the gang, and ends with him saving his life by quitting the gang. TRUE STORY BY REYMUNDO SANCHEZ
Member
Join Date: Aug 2007
Posts: 225
This website: Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), Self-love, Narcissism, Narcissists, Psychopaths, and Relationships with Abusers, Stalkers, and Bullies - Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Re-Visited has a lot of information, although the webdesign leaves a little something to be desired.
There is apparently also a book connected to this, although I haven't read it.
The thing that I found most interesting is that narcissism is a personality disorder, there is no cure. Moreover, no one who has it really wants a cure because the benefits of seeing/treating the world this way far outweigh the costs.
Somehow, reading all of this made me wish I was a narcissist. So be careful!
There is apparently also a book connected to this, although I haven't read it.
The thing that I found most interesting is that narcissism is a personality disorder, there is no cure. Moreover, no one who has it really wants a cure because the benefits of seeing/treating the world this way far outweigh the costs.
Somehow, reading all of this made me wish I was a narcissist. So be careful!
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