It Ain't Hallmark But Oughta Be Xmas Cards and Letters
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: my own little world
Posts: 9,071
Dear SIL,
I hope you are enjoying having AH this winter season. For so many years you've begged him to come for a visit, come stay that his life would be better than here, and Ill never forget all those nights when I was sick and or pregnant that you helped him to see hanging with you was much better than being with his wife and family and I want you to know there are no hard feelings.
As you are quite aware a few months ago I decided to give you both a gift and I paid for his trip up to your house, I remember how excited you were on the phone that he was coming at last and there truly is happiness in giving this gift to both of you.
I am sorry to hear you lost that great job youve had for almost a year now, and did I hear the two of you decided to blow off the next job as well? It sounds like you are having a swell time.
A few years ago you said to me you didnt want to take sides and I tried so hard to explain we were both on his side, was waking without your car and learning it was impounded help straighten out the confusion?
I was saddened to hear that your cell phone minutes mysteriously disappear in the middle of the night, I once had that problem myself.
I send my sincerest wishes that your holiday season continues to be an exciting one.
There truly is happiness in giving
I hope you are enjoying having AH this winter season. For so many years you've begged him to come for a visit, come stay that his life would be better than here, and Ill never forget all those nights when I was sick and or pregnant that you helped him to see hanging with you was much better than being with his wife and family and I want you to know there are no hard feelings.
As you are quite aware a few months ago I decided to give you both a gift and I paid for his trip up to your house, I remember how excited you were on the phone that he was coming at last and there truly is happiness in giving this gift to both of you.
I am sorry to hear you lost that great job youve had for almost a year now, and did I hear the two of you decided to blow off the next job as well? It sounds like you are having a swell time.
A few years ago you said to me you didnt want to take sides and I tried so hard to explain we were both on his side, was waking without your car and learning it was impounded help straighten out the confusion?
I was saddened to hear that your cell phone minutes mysteriously disappear in the middle of the night, I once had that problem myself.
I send my sincerest wishes that your holiday season continues to be an exciting one.
There truly is happiness in giving
remember to breathe
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: philadelphia pa
Posts: 1,280
I C A N ' T S T O P L A U G H I N G....................................
Oh thanks for this thread, (breathe) I have read it (breathe) all more than once (breathe) and oh the singing (breathe) I'm out of breath laughing
Oh thanks for this thread, (breathe) I have read it (breathe) all more than once (breathe) and oh the singing (breathe) I'm out of breath laughing
Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Posts: 388
All of you guys are just so dang funny and creative.
I can't even begin to write something half as clever as what I have read here.
I was thinking of telling the realitives just how good my son looked in Orange....
But I didn't mean "Home Depot" orange.
I also thought about telling my family that my two children were in Medical School...
that's why the back of their scrubs said D.O.C.....
I too laughed so hard, I thought I would wet my pants.
But, then again, that's nothing new for me.
Holiday hugs to all you humorists....
Colleen
P.S. Dear Santa, define "Good"
I can't even begin to write something half as clever as what I have read here.
I was thinking of telling the realitives just how good my son looked in Orange....
But I didn't mean "Home Depot" orange.
I also thought about telling my family that my two children were in Medical School...
that's why the back of their scrubs said D.O.C.....
I too laughed so hard, I thought I would wet my pants.
But, then again, that's nothing new for me.
Holiday hugs to all you humorists....
Colleen
P.S. Dear Santa, define "Good"
Nature Girl
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
It's late, I'm punchy and ready for another round 
Deck the halls with pawn shop tickets
Falalalalalalalala
Find a Western Union wicket
Falalalalalalalala
He needed cash and I really tried hard
Falalalalalalalala
But then I found he took my bank card
Falalalalalalalala.
Deck the halls with pawn shop tickets
Falalalalalalalala
Find a Western Union wicket
Falalalalalalalala
He needed cash and I really tried hard
Falalalalalalalala
But then I found he took my bank card
Falalalalalalalala.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: The Burgh
Posts: 1,991
sung to "let it snow"
Oh the life that they lead is frightful
And its hard not to be so darn spiteful
But once we've done all that we know
We let it go, let it go, let it go.
Oh they don't show any signs of stopping
And we're tired from our fighting and "cop -ing"
Our attempts have been futile and so
We let it go, let it go, let it go
When we finally say good night
We just hope for a few hours sleep
But when we start to get it right
Finally we can sleep deep!
When we finally see signs of trying
HP at work, there's no denying
Then finally we know why its so
That
We let it go, let it go, let it go!
Happy Holidays
And its hard not to be so darn spiteful
But once we've done all that we know
We let it go, let it go, let it go.
Oh they don't show any signs of stopping
And we're tired from our fighting and "cop -ing"
Our attempts have been futile and so
We let it go, let it go, let it go
When we finally say good night
We just hope for a few hours sleep
But when we start to get it right
Finally we can sleep deep!
When we finally see signs of trying
HP at work, there's no denying
Then finally we know why its so
That
We let it go, let it go, let it go!
Happy Holidays
Last edited by cece1960; 12-13-2007 at 05:22 AM.
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
Sung to the tune of All I want for Christmas is My two Front Teeth
All I want for Christmas
is to sleep in peace,
to sleep in peace,
Yes to sleep in peace
Gee, if I could only
leave that front row seat,
then I could be serene
for Christmas
It seems so long since I could say,
I’ve had no drama in my day
Gosh oh gee, how happy I'd be,
if I didn’t have to hide my pay
All I want for Christmas
is to sleep in peace,
to sleep in peace,
Yes to sleep in peace
Gee, if I could only
leave that front row seat,
then I could be serene
for Christmas
All I want for Christmas
is to sleep in peace,
to sleep in peace,
Yes to sleep in peace
Gee, if I could only
leave that front row seat,
then I could be serene
for Christmas
It seems so long since I could say,
I’ve had no drama in my day
Gosh oh gee, how happy I'd be,
if I didn’t have to hide my pay
All I want for Christmas
is to sleep in peace,
to sleep in peace,
Yes to sleep in peace
Gee, if I could only
leave that front row seat,
then I could be serene
for Christmas
Administrator
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: a better place
Posts: 4,047
(You know, spellcheck keeps telling me that "codie" is not a word...I beg to differ!)
Speaking of spell check...a bit off topic, but still a laugh...
Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.
Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.
As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rare lea ever wrong.
Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
Its letter perfect awl the weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.
Jujubee Queen
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: Port Charlotte, Florida
Posts: 3,582
Rudolph's Surgery
Christmas was over. Santa and his reindeer finally had a chance to rest. And
they deserved it. They had done a good job.
Rudolph had a chance to do something he had wanted to do for a long time. He
made an appointment with a plastic surgeon because he was so sensitive about
his looks.
However it wasn’t his glowing probiscus that he wanted changed. He was proud
of his nose and the help he had given Santa because of it. No, he was sensitive
about his long ears which were much more prominent than the ears of the average
reindeer, or bear for that matter.
So one week after Christmas, he let the good doctor do the pinna reconstructive
surgery procedure, and since that time, January 1st has been celebrated as ...
New Ears Day.
Christmas was over. Santa and his reindeer finally had a chance to rest. And
they deserved it. They had done a good job.
Rudolph had a chance to do something he had wanted to do for a long time. He
made an appointment with a plastic surgeon because he was so sensitive about
his looks.
However it wasn’t his glowing probiscus that he wanted changed. He was proud
of his nose and the help he had given Santa because of it. No, he was sensitive
about his long ears which were much more prominent than the ears of the average
reindeer, or bear for that matter.
So one week after Christmas, he let the good doctor do the pinna reconstructive
surgery procedure, and since that time, January 1st has been celebrated as ...
New Ears Day.
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Calif
Posts: 1,007
Too Damn Funny!
I have to say I normally hate those damn Christmas letters, but today I really enjoyed them.
Ann, I swear I pee'd my pants laughing (easy to do at this age). So true, so true. I don't think I can top any of those letters.
Sorry I've been away so long...got to catch you all up on the continuing saga of my life.
Hugs & Kisses
Devastated
Ann, I swear I pee'd my pants laughing (easy to do at this age). So true, so true. I don't think I can top any of those letters.
Sorry I've been away so long...got to catch you all up on the continuing saga of my life.
Hugs & Kisses
Devastated
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: NJ
Posts: 702
I too want to thank everyone for bringing me smiles and many laughs. I could never come up with things so clever to say, but I must say all of you are wonderful. I copied some of these and sent them to some friends who have addicts in their families. I got emails back saying thank you and thank them for giving us something to smile about at this time of the year.
Love all of you, and hoping all your holidays are stress free and merry
Love all of you, and hoping all your holidays are stress free and merry
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