the hard part is too that i know he loves me, in his own way...he loves me, but i think because of his father and upbringing he is the way he is. What i have to realize is that it is not MY job to fix it AND to suffer because of how he is or/and what he does. SOmetimes I get confused when it comes to that..i married him for better or for worse...this is the worse part...what my therapist tells me though is that if he wont help himself, that is the difference..
If he would just say "you know, you're right, i have been using, and i shouldnt be, i need to go for help to work on my issues and to figure our why it is that i have turned to drugs at this point in my life, risking everything."...but that is NOT the case. AND i need to keep telling myself that that is the difference.... he is NOT taking responsiblity, he is NOT being accountable for his actions, he is NOT being honest...he is SO defensive, and that is the unfair part..not that he is a substance abuser, but that he wont seek help and take responsiblity...

Do you all agree????