MrsZeus

My favorites have always been...

"I'll call you later, I promise"

"I'll be back in just a little bit"

(After talking weird to me like I was someone else...) "It must have been the fumes from the fried squash"

(2 days after a crackhead took off with his money and didn't bring the drugs back...) "I'm just going to go over there and see if he showed up with either my money or my stuff" (Yeah, crackheads have a conscience like that)

And the all time favorites all start with...

I didn't mean...
I didn't intend...
I never wanted to...
I'm sorry but...

Orangeblossom

I fekt depressed.

I felt sick.

They fired me because they didn't want to pay benefits.

I had to take care of the kids all weekend while you were at work... I deserve it.

It's not my fault. (That one gets repeated ad nauseum.)

Tabithacat

Laughing at myself at these posts!
I could never understand how he lost so many cellphones?!!
And just last night $10 for the bus!!
Seeing as he's selling meth and had a couple grand cash on him at the weekend, I'm thinking no more cash for the bus!!