Spinner-007

Everything I've read and heard about recovering addicts is that they're not supposed to drink due to the gateway effect.

My wife is addicted to hydrocodone and is on suboxone right now. We just had a heated discussion about an occasional drink during her recovery.

We agreed to meet with her doctor who is prescribing the suboxone, and he is a stickler and very direct.

in the meantime, I need any and all input on this.

has anyone ever experienced an addict NOT going back to addiction and still could drink?

I know it's too risky, but I need assurances. She appeared to fight for the 'right' to drink like she was fighting for air under water...

tiburon88

I suppose it is possible BUT highly unlikely. She might get away with drinking on a couple of occassions but eventually it will lead back to the hydrocone. Why take any extra chances?

Spinner-007

That's MY feeling. It's ignorance, arrogance, denial, and risky. Or, it's addiction, plain and simple.

It also makes me question if she's really aware how bad her addiction really is.

lil516

I suppose you'll hear a few varying opinions on this but it has been my experience that a drug is a drug is a drug and alcohol is a drug

most addicts have a DOC but anything will do in a pinch and alcohol fits that profile

she may be able to "control" alcohol consumption better and longer than any other drugs but I believe it will eventually lead her back to using...

my son is the addict in my life and he tried to go the "just a few beers" route but it was soon business as usual

until she is able to move her mind to a spot where drugs (including alcohol) have no place her recovery will be in jeopardy...

greeteachday

I guess what it comes down to is she will do what she will do and you can not control whether she drinks any more than you can control her other drug use. I don't mean it to sound flippant, but bringing alcohol or pot into the mix is no different than any other drug. If you do not want alcohol in your home, then perhaps the boundary for you (and not to control her) is no drinking in the home and if this happens, the consequence is...(whatever you are comfortable sticking to) But if your boundary is about controlling her recovery, I'm afraid it will just make you stressed and anxious and do nothing for her. I wish this wasn't true, but love alone can not arrest this disease.

greeteachday

I think it is very common for us and for addicts to believe that we can still kick the problems on our own...control, control, control. Step one is probably one of the hardest steps to takem and I know I find myself circling back to it in my life whenever I get to comfortable in my own recovery and stop working my program.

Done_With_It

There are some addicts who can drink and don't have a problem with it, but I wouldn't say that is the norm.
Is her drinking affecting you? If it is I would be concerned, but if not I would let her deal with it, she knows how you feel, but you can't stop her, and it's her issue.
The more you 'fight' her on this the more she is going to fight for her right.
People usually need to come to their own conclusions about what their problems are.
If she does has a problem with drinking she'll most likely figure it out soon enough.
If it is affecting you, then Greet had some great idea.

JMO.. :boat

Spinner-007

It really does come to that: control, that is. Thanks, Greet. It's kinda funny but I'm already feeling less anxious by just letting her deal with it. I just don't want it in the house around the kids anymore.

And thank you too, Done with It. Your response reminded me about a post I read earlier in which the addict was seeking recovery because it was what others wanted him to do, not neccessarily what he wanted to do. Like pursuing an occupation, just how can we really expect that person to go if they're not the one doing for themselves?

You're also on target about her knowing how much it concerns me, especially with all the stuff we're now going through. And yet she still wants(or needs) to have that drink.

And you're right on about the drug: it's subing one for another...

I guess I'm just still getting to the realization that this is far more than what it appears on the surface(to me), and there's going to be pain, and disappointment(like there's NOT right now!), and it saddens me...

Thanks again for being there, everyone. I can't get over how much help this site has been! I don't want to imagine what it would've been like BEFORE the internet!