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I am MAD !

Old 10-04-2007, 08:50 AM
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I am MAD !

No more Mrs. Nice Guy for me. I am mad, Mad, MAD !

I am a nice person. I don't "do" anger very well. In fact, I cannot remember the last time I was really, truly, honest-to-god mad. Well, I am today !

I am angry. Ticked off. Fuming. Pacing. Unable to concentrate at work. Spitting nails. Stomping my feet. Grinding my teeth. And it's over something trite... but it obviously triggered something very big in me.

I want to throw things. Hit things. I want to spew all sorts of ugly words in someone's direction.

BUT I don't want to have to make those darn amends later, so I am TRYING to work this off in a healthy manner.

With that said, I'd feel really really good if I could just kick a certain someone RIGHT in the shins. :uzi2:

So what do I do now??
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Old 10-04-2007, 08:53 AM
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let it grow!
 
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well. take a deep breath. say the serenity prayer. and get over it?

hugs, k

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Old 10-04-2007, 08:55 AM
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EXERCISE! Works for me every time...
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Old 10-04-2007, 09:02 AM
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Hey Cats...

I gotta agree with Dazed on this one...
When I get worked up like this, I just HAVE TO hit the gym. Exercise seems to work the toxins out of my system and I ALWAYS leave feeling like I got my balance back.

Maybe a nice long walk or something is in order?

Whatever you do...
I hope you feel better soon !!!!

Hugs...
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Old 10-04-2007, 09:11 AM
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Punch a pillow. Go somewhere where no one will hear you and YELL (be sure no one hears you tho!). Run until you get one of those side stitches and have no more breath and then run some more.

Or.... just walk up to 'em and have at their shins. I have found that shin kicking usually results in an immediate counter reaction of a punch from the receiver of the kick, so be sure to duck... and wear shin guards in case they kick back! (Just kidding).
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Old 10-04-2007, 09:11 AM
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I don't do too well getting over things, I generally have to get through them.

For me, it is a matter of processing the real feelings. You know something got triggered... why not journal about it?

Figure out the feeling behind the anger... generally, it is fear. Fear of being not good enough... fear of feeling discounted.... fear of being unheard, or unloved. Those are the big ones for me.

Then think about when in your past you've had those feelings before.... for me, it all goes back to childhood. I was never good enough for mom or dad. There were times I did not do my best, and they always, always called me on it - but, conversely, when I DID do my best... they still yelled and figured out where I could have done it faster, better or more completely. I could not BE good enough.

What I also (try) to do is figure out my part in the current situation. The other person almost NEVER knows about my past, so my big response to their smaller slight is often out of character for me and out of their range of understanding. I have to take responsibility for the size of my fear and my angry response.

I can write about that... most of that writing starts out with me wanting to physically hurt the offending one.... by the time I am done, I've gone full circle to wanting to hurt myself then understanding me and them and asking for my Higher Power's help in getting through this.

It really, REALLY helps to share this with my sponsor. Writing it out, talking it out and then praying for strength and compassion.

I am sorry you are having this struggle... prayers that you can find the lesson and the relief. (((Cat)))
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Old 10-04-2007, 09:20 AM
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maybe allowing yourself to get angry or at least just feel it? It's a real emotion ya know and it's there for a reason...figure out what it trying to tell you. Embrace it don't react to it ( aka calling names you'll regret later)

Or run that's what I do...
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Old 10-04-2007, 09:22 AM
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I say kick him!
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Old 10-04-2007, 09:33 AM
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Originally Posted by nevergivingup View Post
I say kick him!
LOL, and I will personally donate a pair of steel toed bunny slippers that are guaranteed to do the job!!! And we haven't needed the skillet for a long time, so I'll shine it up and send it too.

Let 'er rip, Cat, we're here and we care and we've got your back.

:firefight
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Old 10-04-2007, 09:42 AM
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For me, when I'm angry that's when I have to write the FU letters!!
To the person, I think I'm angry at
To the situation
To the disease
To the world
and
maybe even to me for "letting" myself get in this situation

Usually after I have "vented" the anger, I can get to some other emotions that are going on with this anger also -

and somedays - I just have to feel mad - Just for Today - tomorrow I'll work on regaining the calmness - but today I'll allow myself to feel mad.


You are a very wise woman, cats - write it out, work it out, clean it out, feel it out - whatever works for you - most of all remember to please be good to YOU.

Hope that you are able to do what you need to do to healthily process your emotions and also take care of you in this process.

((cats))

Keeping you in my thoughts & prayers,
Rita
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Old 10-04-2007, 09:49 AM
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Originally Posted by nevergivingup View Post
I say kick him!
So...we all KNOW its a him, right?

Cats, I feel for you. I've experienced BLINDING anger over what to some may seem trivial.
If its professional, I usually get over it eventually by telling myself that chances are they'll out themselves before I ever have another run in with them.

If its personal...well lets just say I don't handle that quite as well. Very good chance due to fear as BigSis mentioned.

I say let 'er rip also, here where its safe. Then if you still need to, borrow the slippers.

Hope your day improves
(((Hugs)))
Cece
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Old 10-04-2007, 09:55 AM
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let it grow!
 
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or you could just kick him...

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Old 10-04-2007, 10:13 AM
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Pray without ceasing before you kick!
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Old 10-04-2007, 10:22 AM
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Wouldn't everyone just love to have 15 minutes a day to throw themselves on the floor kicking and screaming, arms flailing like a 2 years old having a temper tantrum?!?

Cats~Kick away!
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Old 10-04-2007, 11:45 AM
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Leave it to me..but..in all honesty..this must be said...But...this goes back to a really old message I had posted to you....hummm..but..you still didn't fix the problem. You need to pull your dress out of your pantyhose and you will feel so much better :O)!!!

I still love your little icon..evertime i look at it...it makes me smile!!

Cheer up honey...it will get better!!
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Old 10-04-2007, 11:50 AM
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Well.....

I say, get in the car, blast the radio, and scream your head off.

(unless you truly think kicking him would be a good problem solver...if that's the case, go right ahead....)
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Old 10-04-2007, 12:59 PM
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((( all my SR friends )))

See, I KNEW you would understand... and that you would support me in whatever I decided to do. I love your responses - they made me laugh and not take myself quite so seriously.

Trisha, you are absolutely on top of things. This MAN had the nerve to tell me that he didn't like how I dress, and he doesnt like my little white dog, and I have toilet paper on my shoe. How is it HIS problem if my skirt might be <--- stuck in my panty hose? Doesn't he know that what other people think of me is none of my business?????? LOL

I'm better now. Thanks for being here.

Love and hugs
Cats

PS I also truly love the idea of having 15 minutes to throw my own walleyed hissie fit (as my mother would call them...) I think I will start now. Tune into the local news, hopefully I won't be on there as a result of my kicking and screaming on the floor at WalMart (as my kids were known to do)
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Old 10-04-2007, 01:03 PM
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Hmm, I have a bf who does not have a drinking problem but smokes, and does nicorettes, and chews his nails.

Am I worse than him? Doesn't matter, I guess as I still have MY problem.

Alyce
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Old 10-04-2007, 02:37 PM
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Smile

Glad to see your sense of humor is shining Cats.
I still like the idea of a kick in the shins. Pulling off hissy fits just wear me out.
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Old 10-04-2007, 04:58 PM
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Maybe you could just kick'em, Cats.

Hugs,
Linda
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