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AD in detox

Old 09-26-2007, 03:18 PM
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Cool AD in detox

I'll hit the highpoints:
called last night, wanted to come home, told NO, asked WHY? told her why. Told her to contact counselor and ask him for help. He called me and gave update--was beaten, burned, ABF in jail on Sunday for theft He said she was reaching out, to help but not bring home.

Went to get her after she asked to go to police station to press charges. On the way she called from the laundry mat where she had been for 2 days saying someone just pulled a gun, not on her, but someone else. I said Marle's line--This is the life you chose. There is a way out. I got there, she is sitting outside jumps up wearing HIS clothes, shoes, absolutely filthy.

She showed me her leg which was already infected. She asked again to go to PD and we did--pictures, report etc. He was still in jail, this would be added charge.

Took her to ER, 4 hours later, left w/ no place to go. She has no insurance and in Dallas unless you want help between 8-500 you are SOL. So, talked w/ counselor as I wasn't taking her home. There was free detox in am, first come first serve at an OK place, so went to motel. She bathed, scrubbed and looked almost human. The ER doc wrote her 10 clonidine to help w/ the detox until morning.

Took her this am, she is there (what a mess that place is!) She is there 3 days. Found a sober living place in OK that counselor said she needs to go. Will talk w/ her when she calls. She seems wanting help, but I've thought that before. The director said is she is not ready, not waste our time, let her go back out. If she is ready, pick her up, have her call and get her there.

Alot to pray about, think about. Seeing her abused in that way is devestating. Can't say what I think! But I told her, he was wrong but you went back, he did it before, you went back.

I don't know if this is for real, but I was only out hotel and lunch for her today. I didn't sign the ER notes, didn't promise anything,--I did pay for antibiotics, ER gave me the silvadene ointment--saved me $30.

Please pray for me and for God to remain in control and direct me, and to speak to her heart.
Oh yeah, checked the online inmate system, he got out late last nite, don't know why. tried to call the court to see when the warrant went out for the assault, still waiting on a call.

Any advice or thoughts appreciated!
susan
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Old 09-26-2007, 03:31 PM
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no advice but it sounds like you did a good job to me.
Hang in there I know it cant be easy.................(((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))) )))
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Old 09-26-2007, 03:40 PM
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((((Susan)))
What a trip for you.
There can be light, a very bright one at the end of the tunnel. YOU did so well in not getting sucked in...I am very impressed.
She has options, they've been laid out for her.
I'll send up prayers that she makes the right decisions.
(((Hugs)))
Cece
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Old 09-26-2007, 03:41 PM
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caileesnana,
What a life of turmoil they live.
I'm praying that this is her bottom, and she stays with the road she's decided to take today. We can hope.
Have faith, her H.P. has her right where he wants her right now.

You did a wonderful job, staying in your recovery, and not caving.

Hugs, and prayers
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Old 09-26-2007, 03:45 PM
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you did the right thing by picking her up since she was wanting help for rehab. i truely hope that she will stay. i am glad she was not hurt any worse than she is. i hope this is her bottom.i am saying a prayer for you & her.
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Old 09-26-2007, 04:01 PM
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Susan,

My heart hurts for both you and your daughter, but I am so amazed at the strength you have shown due to your recovery. Great move, using the line of Marle's. It's true.

I pray she sees the light and is desperate enough to want help. I can't imagine how hard this all was for you, knowing she has chosen the abusive situation. I just know I am so proud of you and the way you detached. You really are a great example of recovery.

Hugs and prayers for both of you,

Hangin' In
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Old 09-26-2007, 04:02 PM
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Susan, The ball is in her court. Try to remember that the pull of addiction is so strong. You did good. I will say some really big prayers that Kasey decides that she has had enough. Hugs, Marle
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Old 09-26-2007, 04:08 PM
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Susan, I also wanted to let you know that you helped me too. When you wrote the thread about Kasey calling you and wanting help and then not being there when you went to get her, it was just at the right moment for me to hear that. Shortly after Megan called with her story of being beaten by her abf and I was able to stay calm and realize that she would probably not leave. I remembered what happened with you and I was able to let it go. Hugs, Marle
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Old 09-26-2007, 04:36 PM
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((moms)) ((addicted kids))

That's all I can say right now.

Cats
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Old 09-26-2007, 04:47 PM
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(((Susan))) As the mother of a son who is an addict, I can't imagine how much harder it must be to have an addicted daughter.

Sending my biggest and best prayers that your daughter stays on a good path. And prayers of comfort and strength for you.

Hugs
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Old 09-26-2007, 07:02 PM
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(((Susan)))

This is sooo heartbreaking, but you know, sometimes, this is just what they need to wake em up!!

Prayers for you and AD!!! May this be her time. You, my friend are shining in your recovery!!!

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Old 09-26-2007, 07:16 PM
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omg..... wow....

Well you did really good. I can't think of anything better that you could have done.
It's okay that you paid for her antibiotics and the hotel, your always going to be her mom, you can't change your love for her. You do what feels right for you.

I hope this is her time, but if not, it's just one step closer to getting her there.
But damn, I'm so sorry you have to watch it.
Thanks for sharing, these reminders are why I know I will never do meth again, No way...
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Old 09-26-2007, 07:31 PM
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I too am hoping this is her bottom. You did a great job at handling the situation. You should be very proud of yourself!!!
Sending prayers for you and Kasey tonight.
HUGS
Terri
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Old 09-26-2007, 07:39 PM
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How awful for you to see her like that. But at lease you did get to see her an you know she's alive. Praying for her an you that this is her bottom.
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Old 09-26-2007, 09:33 PM
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Susan, what a difficult time for all of you...You did so well in such a heartbreaking situation. It takes a lot of strong recovery to be able to love enough to say no. I'm grateful for what you shared here and for all the wonderful people here whose experience strength and hope helped you to get to this point. You are both in my prayers. Hugs
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Old 09-27-2007, 05:03 AM
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susan,

i just wanted to let you know i REALLy admire your strength - i can only imagine how seeing your daughter like that must have been but you did the right thing - you showed uncondtional love and they say that is the most important thing in process of getting help with addiction - i hope my sister will reach out to someone, anyone soon - for my mom's sake...

(((((((((love))))))))))),
sue
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Old 09-27-2007, 07:03 AM
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Cool He's IS out

and calling the house, having "friends" call. I told them 3 times, her dad twice, she is not here. I told one guy she left two months ago with the drug dealer criminal, ask him where she is. As Iknew, he had put the guy up to calling! So I guess he hasn't been picked up on criminal assault yet. I told this guy to tell his friend never call my home again as the police were monitoring calls for drug dealers on this number. They hung up! It is hard to pray for someone I cant stand. Again I prayed for his soul, that someone would touch him and begin his change in life. Personally, I think he is a sociopath, but have no professional data to support.

Took a few personal items by the place for Kasey last nite as she asked. Didn't buy anything, had it all from her room. When I got there, couldn't get in, had to go "around back to the phone". They were all out getting a breath of air. I hear "MOM!" and turned around. She was sitting, in detox issued scrubs all alone, really looked pathetic. The attendant asked her if she wanted to talk to me while he searched the bag. So she did, hugged me, said she was sorry (words!) I hugged her and told her I would always love her, no matter what. She didn't feel well and said "i know it is my fault". All I could say was it'll get better, just keep moving forward. Told her about the sober living place, she said it sounded good and she would call if they would let her, or upon discharge. She said again she needs out of this area.

She called and 7, wanted to say she love me before she went to sleep. I told her the same, get lots of rest and let your body head...pray and let God work on your heart! She said she does and has been, that's why she is still here. Once again, words, but some words I wanted to hear and she'd never verbalized before.

Thanks for all the kind words, I couldn't have gotten to where I am w/o God and SR. YOu have saved me. I did tell her I wasn't the same MOM she walked out on 8 weeks ago, I knew what I would and wouldn't do, and I won't vary from that. She said she understood, and said thanks for coming to help me again.

love and thanks,
susan
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Old 09-27-2007, 07:32 AM
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susan, you were there for her when she needed you the most. nice job, mom.

can you/she get a restraining order against the bf/his friends. um, i'd like to knee cap them all....

prayers, hugs, support, understanding, admiration, on and on...........k
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Old 09-27-2007, 08:57 AM
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Boy, Susan I know we are like family here. I am crying all over my keyboard. I am such a whimp. I just feel such a relief that she called and she is in detox and away from that monster. You know us codies, just get attached to our SR kids. I am relieved for you, Susan. I know you are keeping your expectations low, but it is a step in a positive direction.
I know what it does to a mother's heart to see them look so pathetic. I'll never forget Jen's release from the ER a few months ago......she was picking cigarette butts up off of the street to smoke. She was acting like a typical homeless person.
I wouldn't have put it passed her to go through the garbage to get something to eat.
Things that we see are things a mother should never have to see.

You showed a lot of strength. I know it was not easy for you by any means but your recovery is shining brightly. You did all of the right things......I don't know that I could have been that strong.

Keeping you and Kasey in prayer.

Love and friendship...................Lois
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Old 09-27-2007, 09:44 AM
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Just hugs going out...
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