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-   -   What does acceptance mean to you? (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-substance-abusers/132951-what-does-acceptance-mean-you.html)

frankie_b 09-19-2007 02:24 AM

What does acceptance mean to you?
 
The serenity prayer starts with God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.
I cannot change a thing that happened in the past and many things that happen in the present.Acceptance is the key.


This is from AA's Big Book
And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed , it is because I find some person, place, thing....some fact of my life unacceptable to me.
And I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place thing or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment.
Unless I accept life completely on life's terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in my attitudes.

To me the courage to change means not that I should change another, but rather I should change myself and learn to accept others as they were and are.

Ann 09-19-2007 03:45 AM

To me, acceptance doesn't necessarily mean approval, it just means that I acknowledge that it is what it is and move on.

Acceptance means I stop struggling with that which is not mine to change and let go of the frustration and learn to live with it or around it.

Good thread to get my brain warmed up for the day, frankie b.

Hugs

CatsPajamas 09-19-2007 06:32 AM

I have kept this in my files because of how it defines acceptance:

Power of acceptance
+++++++++++++++++++

When the world seems to be falling down around you, you can choose to fall down with it or you can choose a more positive path. Acceptance will put you on that positive path.

Fighting against negativity only produces more negativity.
Yet when you accept what is, no matter how terrible and difficult it may be, you put yourself in a position to start changing it for the better.

Acceptance does not mean giving in or giving up. It means moving on, as in moving on ahead.

There is simply no point in fighting battles which have already been lost, nor is there any point in allowing the loss to continue to slow you down. The smart strategy is to accept it and then put all your energy toward a positive pursuit.

Acceptance does not mean allowing others to take advantage of you. It simply means that you look realistically at what has happened and allow yourself to see the positive opportunities that are most certainly there.

Once you accept what is, you are free to move positively forward. Once you quit fighting, you are free to start achieving.

Ralph Marston

cinderellawkids 09-19-2007 06:46 AM

FUnny that this is the topic as it was in todays AA reading in reflections as well.

Acceptance to mean means acepting Life around you and living life on lifes terms.

ctrom40 09-19-2007 06:59 AM

I think that my definition of acceptance was formed when I becam a widow 15 years ago at the age of 33.
I was alone and trying to raise 3 kids:

Acceptance to me = "It is what it is".


Colleen
(I am NOT an "Ann-wanna-be" LOL)

rahsue 09-19-2007 07:14 AM

today, acceptance is escaping me. today I am accepting that my codie self is making me miserable.

better days ahead!

Elana 09-19-2007 07:31 AM

It depends on how close to you the thing is on how well it is accepted and moved on from.

I can move on from a plane crash in a far away placewhere I knew no one on board almost immediately... I can move on from a local disaster where I knew someone marginally pretty fast.. and moving on from some garbage from anyone I really care about is a lot harder.

I find acceptance on the really tough things is easier when I hand it over to my HP.. I imagine him driving a trash truck and I load my garbage in the back of it and my HP drives it away. I take a deep breath and let it out slowly while I imagine this.

Of course, codie that I am, sometimes this takes a bit and sometimes I give it up and take it back a few times before it is gone for good!

Acceptance is an EFFORT that requires perseverance to attain.

frankie_b 09-20-2007 06:39 AM

Accepting life on life's terms is a concept I try to incorporate in my daily living.
I need to stay grounded in reality rather than wishing reality were other than it is. I don't have to like reality, only to accept it for what it is in order to feel reasonably serene. When I spend my time wishing things were different, had been different, I know that I have lost my focus and serenity, peace of mind elude me.
Today,I am responsible for changing what I can. I may not do it perfectly :Wgla and that's okay.
Progress not perfection.
Today I love myself enough to give up a struggle over whatever is out of my hands and keep keeping on, grateful for HP's guidance and for the gift of recovery.

CatsPajamas 09-20-2007 07:08 AM


I find acceptance on the really tough things is easier when I hand it over to my HP.. I imagine him driving a trash truck and I load my garbage in the back of it and my HP drives it away. I take a deep breath and let it out slowly while I imagine this.
Elana, that is a terrific concept. Can I borrow it?

And the trash truck?

Cats

frankie_b 09-20-2007 07:25 AM

An HP that does the driving complete with dump truck while you Elana, can just kick back and breathe having surrended it all to HP has me smiling.
Cats, think I may want to borrow that one too * grins *
So, Elana, what say you?

sobercuse 09-20-2007 08:15 AM

Great thread Frankie, thanks.

The later part of the serenity prayer is what acceptance is....

"Accepting the world as it is and not as I would have it."

It's about surrendering my will.
Thy will be done.

Thanks again.


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