Her counselor called me. . .

Old 08-09-2007, 05:51 PM
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Her counselor called me. . .

I don't know how orthodox that is but her counselor called me and vouched for my AGF. Her counselor said that she'd being going to group the last few days and showing up for her psych sessions. Apparently, they do random drug screens and my ex's showed up clean. I guess my AGF asked if she'd call me and let me know how wrong I was!

Now what?

I feel like crap but then again it's not my fault that I assumed the worse. It's not my fault that I can't trust her. Even if I'm wrong the relationship won't work because there's no trust. But then again I feel bad because I wanted to support her and encourage her and be the one person who'd stand by her. I'm happy that I was wrong but it still doesn't change the fact that the relationship is doomed because I'll always assume the worse. Depressing
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Old 08-09-2007, 05:58 PM
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Okay, I know how you feel because as soon as I read this I thought that I hate to be so untrusting, but are you sure it was her counselor. Just playing the devil's advocate and knowing addicts and how they lie. If it is true then it is probably an okay thing to do if she gave the counselor permission. Hugs, Marle
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Old 08-09-2007, 06:02 PM
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Why are you so involved? I thought she was your ex.

The bond of trust is broken, and it will not be redeemed anytime soon.

Give her a year of soberity, and, then you can readress the relationship again...what in the world is the rush to jump back in feet first.
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Old 08-09-2007, 06:16 PM
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Yea, you're right ,Dolly. I guess I go back and forth in reference (AGF/exAGF)because of how involved I AM in all this. But she is my ex. As I said, I know the relationship won't work because of trust issues. And again I'm learning to set boundaries and stick to them but my conscience is killing me now.

You know, Marle, I hadn't even considered that it may not have been her counselor. Thanks. Bummer. . .lol.
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Old 08-09-2007, 06:18 PM
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i'm wondering the same as Marle. it seems kind of unethical for the counselor to be calling you...Hmmmm...
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Old 08-09-2007, 06:22 PM
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I didn't say it either, but, I thought the same thing...her counselor has overstepped her bounderies by calling you...sounds like a con to me.
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Old 08-09-2007, 06:25 PM
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you sound as if she is still your g.f. but you clarifiedshe was your ex.let go or get dragged. do not let anything that she does or don't do make you feel guilty.i know u want her clean but there is nothig u can do to help her. you know that.sending prayers up for you & also for her.
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Old 08-09-2007, 06:33 PM
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Blue, Maybe you could ask if you could accompany her to her next appointment Marle
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Old 08-09-2007, 06:53 PM
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You said it when you said the trust is gone. Once that's gone, you never feel the same about that person no matter how hard you try to hang on.

It's a shame addicts wake up too late sometimes. But, that is usually the trigger to make them seek help.
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Old 08-09-2007, 06:58 PM
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That would be a full proof plan, Marle. . .ha ha. I have gone before. Hmmmm. . . I'm not sure I want to know the truth though. I'd rather make this be about trust isues then her possibly using again. Call me a coward but it'd be a lot less painful.
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