Going To Drive Him

Old 08-02-2007, 12:38 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: The Burgh
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I am so sorry this keeps taking quick turns for you.

I can only speak for what I feel, and what I've expereinced myself. I'm certainly no expert.
I understand completely what your ex is saying. He knows from experience that I don't have.
But there is a chance that "his way" (a program and a sponsor) will never transpire. Thats not to say that your son can't find his way his own way, but not all of those who to stop using choose a program and/or sponsor.

What is saying no to accomplish? Making him do it a certain way? I understand not wanting to be manipulated, or hurt or disappointed. But cutting our children off unless they choose a program and a sponser...I can't say I could agree to that.

Cutting them off to protect myself...yes, but to me this is different. You mentioned giving him a ride so that YOU could see him, you missed him. No expectations.

I don't mean to be a wet rag on the subject...sorry.

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Old 08-02-2007, 12:50 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 3,335
is not picking him up going to stop him from using?

is picking him up going to stop him from using?

what will make you happy?

it should be about what you want, not what people are telling you to do. if you have clear boundaries and a place to drop him off and seeing him isn't going to rip you apart, then please do what makes you happy and don't worry about pleasing anyone else. in the friends and family member of alcoholics I posted (option presenting vs. enabling) an excerpt from a book. It's an interesting read about what enabling is.
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Old 08-02-2007, 09:36 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Rozied, I'm glad you are going to get to see your son for a little while. No matter what....... it does a mother good just to have that hug and tell him you love him.

Go for it mom........Lois
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