feeling great
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: reality
Posts: 156
feeling great
well, I feel..GREAT. Kind of unexpected, perhaps I have just gone back and forth enough times that I am so exhausted that I can't even muster the energy for being broken hearted or remorse or pursuing a reconciliation. Thankfully the EXabf has not tried to contact me either.
so today I go to work and I had 2 evaluations by superiors and I got excellent remarks and they all think I am great...well, HURRAY for me, made me feel good about myself.. and I have been in contact with people and chatting and watching movies and going for walks and eating whatever i want. And when I was driving home I thought to myself, what a relief to have this burden lifted. I mean here it is friday and I have no worries, no waiting around to see if he will or won't show up, no disappointed expectations of a night with my boyfriend.
he came and picked up his stuff while I was gone and so...out of my life !!! Yipee. friends are being wonderfully supportive, even my therapist was joking that he should make me sign a contract that I will not go back to the exabf and then we worked on a strategy of what to do if he contacts me.
sent an itemized bill the the exabf and am waiting until he tells me no..and then, I am sending it to his parents, in a very business like format, and we will see what happens.
thanks all
so today I go to work and I had 2 evaluations by superiors and I got excellent remarks and they all think I am great...well, HURRAY for me, made me feel good about myself.. and I have been in contact with people and chatting and watching movies and going for walks and eating whatever i want. And when I was driving home I thought to myself, what a relief to have this burden lifted. I mean here it is friday and I have no worries, no waiting around to see if he will or won't show up, no disappointed expectations of a night with my boyfriend.
he came and picked up his stuff while I was gone and so...out of my life !!! Yipee. friends are being wonderfully supportive, even my therapist was joking that he should make me sign a contract that I will not go back to the exabf and then we worked on a strategy of what to do if he contacts me.
sent an itemized bill the the exabf and am waiting until he tells me no..and then, I am sending it to his parents, in a very business like format, and we will see what happens.
thanks all
Awaiting Email Confirmation
Thread Starter
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: reality
Posts: 156
Ah, dolly, How I wish I had listened to you months ago. But, we all have to go through our journey and I guess the most important thing for me was accepting that I was just going to have to go through a period of loneliness and no sex ... Once i came to terms with that, once I was able to handle that, I was able to stop staying with an addict in order to avoid being alone. Because after all being with an addict is like being alone.
Last edited by oneeyeopen; 07-27-2007 at 07:33 PM. Reason: spelling
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: here and now
Posts: 1,291
Originally Posted by oneeyeopen 
But, we all have to go through our journey and I guess the most important thing for me was accepting that I was just going to have to go through a period of loneliness and no sex ... Once i came to terms with that, once I was able to handle that, I was able to stop staying with an addict in order to avoid being alone. Because after all being with an addict is like being alone.
Congradulations on your review!
Life only gets better from here!
It has been over 5 months since I saw my exabf and 3 months since I answered one of his calls. He STILL calls. He called tonight. someday he will give up.
Now when I see that he has called, it just gives me a creepy feeling...and that is all.
No contact and getting thier stuff out of the house is what really helps, too, as you know.
I am so much happier than before. I can do what I want, don't have to wait and worry about him!
I just finished a final and now I have only one semester of school left to complete my 2 year degree and I plan to get a 4 year degree. I can have people over without drama. I don't have an addict mooching off me anymore!
Yes, we are in control of our destiny now. It does feel great!!
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I was thinking last night, gosh I feel more like myself than I have in months...
Also, the failure of this relationship was for one reason only-- he started doing drugs again. that's it. I know that if he wasn't an addict, or had managed to continue to being clean (you have to remember, he had been clean for 14 years) this would not have failed.
he had me so convinced that his drug use was only part of the problem but that my flaws etc, were also a major part of the problems...HA, seriously, we have flaws, yup, and our behavior is not always conducive to a good relationship, but you know, doing drugs, that trumps all of it. I don't care what a sh*t some of us can be, the fact that the other person in the relationship is doing drugs, that is the reason the relationships with these people fail.
Also, the failure of this relationship was for one reason only-- he started doing drugs again. that's it. I know that if he wasn't an addict, or had managed to continue to being clean (you have to remember, he had been clean for 14 years) this would not have failed.
he had me so convinced that his drug use was only part of the problem but that my flaws etc, were also a major part of the problems...HA, seriously, we have flaws, yup, and our behavior is not always conducive to a good relationship, but you know, doing drugs, that trumps all of it. I don't care what a sh*t some of us can be, the fact that the other person in the relationship is doing drugs, that is the reason the relationships with these people fail.
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