Wascally Wabbit

Here's what can happen to you when you stay with an addict!

I have a friend I love dearly. She got a great job as an assist mgr at a the company I work for at my recomendation. She is college educated, brilliant, funny and the most loving person you could know.

She isn't working this job 6 months and hooks up with the drug addict from hell.
SHe wound up getting involved in drugs herself. What happened next?
Well, he came into her work and stole something!
Needless to say that didn't look to good.

Next, she is so involved with his life that they bust the apartment she's living in. She's so drugged up and resists arrest.
Gets a DUI within a few days of that.
Gets kicked out of her apt. Goes back to get stuff and assaults the landlord.
LOSES HER JOB.
(He is arrested for the same things and has an arrest record 10 miles long. And, from what I hear, he's a suspect in a bank robbery)

Starts working as a waitress because now that she has a record, no one will look twice at hiring her, even though she has all this education.

Ok, fast forward to now. She was kicked out again, from the place she was staying, still drugging.

Gets arrested for not paying the fines from the previous citations, and is now in jail!
Finds out she is now pregnant with this idiots baby.

Her response: "This baby is all I have left of him."
She lives in a constant state of denial believing she loves him!!! He is the biggest loser on the face of the planet, but she "loves" him.

This is what living with an addict can do to you. You get caught up in the drama, you believe in the addict, and you might just get caught up in the whole drug scene yourself destroying your life.

Is it worth it?

Elana

Like I said..
We do need to KICK THEM TO THE CURB

I have a friend who told me to kick my A to the curb two years b4 I did. I ALMOST did. Almost does not count.

outonalimb

Wow...thats one powerful story!!

How sad..how very, very sad.

classysista

these post open up my mind! to the reality of this thing. THIS AINT NO FAIRY TALE We try to make it into ... God never intended for us to have to save a man from his addiction so we can be with him. AND I AM COMING TO that realization. reading these post today has made me cry .. read and then cry and cry ... wow.. my heart goes out to all of you who have loved an addicted swore to the world that he is a good man.. and put ourselves through mess to just be with him.. have him say he loves us and say those things that made us stay for as long as we did..
im still.. here but my heart is slowly walking away and my mind is waking up and saying WHAT ARE YOU DOING.... I LOVE this support .. i love the real raw picture your given in these stories KEEP THEM coming ..

Kickass1

Hi. I am new & reading these posts today just make me want to cry. I didn't know that there was a forum and I am happy that I ran into this. I don't do drugs but I my husband does. I have a lot to share but just not ready just yet. I am learning and right now I am at a loss because we are getting ready to move and I just resigned from my job of seven years. He tells me that he has no intentions of doing anything once we are down south. I feel like a jerk myself but I am giving this a chance and boy if he messes this up I am gone for good. I know I shouldn't and yes, kick his A to the curb. This has been hard for me and our family. I can't do this anymore and I am stressed and drained.

Thank you for sharing your story.

Wascally Wabbit

Classy, I am blown away by your statement "God never intended for us to have to save a man from his addiction so we can be with him". It's absolutley true. Our codependant tendencies cause us to stay in something to try to fix someone who is unfixable!
And you're right, this life we live with an addict is not a fairy tale that we are trying to make it into. It's a living hell. If we didnt find alanon, we would stay just as messed up as the addict.

DramaQueenLucy

These stories remind me about my 9 years journey with ex-ah. I need to be reminded of these things because I seem to minimize the bad times so these take me back to a place that I saw things clearly....Thanks for Sharing.

frankie_b

I met women in Alanon who had joined their partners and became addicts/alcoholics.
Some were in recovery, others stuck in denial. It's not uncommon.