MsPINKAcres

in catching up from Friday - I got my paycheck today - yippee.

Also - my new picture is two of my grandchildren - Payton & Lexi - I love this picture - they are having so much fun - just hanging out together.

I have had my digital camera for a couple of years, but just learned how to load the pictures on the computer - can you tell?

Rita

MsPINKAcres

Not to computer savy - so hope I can

saved the pictures on my c drive

then edit my profile/ avatar - clicked on browse - to add different avatar - found correct picture, clicked open & saved changes

Hope that helps - I am very basic on my computer usage.

Live

KJ, just give the Chantix some more time. My daughter first called to tell me about it and she said one of the attorneys she works with had a 2 pack a day habit and his mom a 3 pack a day habit. They didn't TRY to quit. But attorney reported that after taking it for 3-4 weeks he suddenly realized he hadn't gone out to get cigarettes over the weekend, he forgot! And it worked for his mom too.
I discussed it with my p-doc and she said it is totally diferent than Welbutrin or Zyban which had been promoted as aids to stop smoking in the past. We looked it up and she said the chemical structure and how it work is totally different and should work. She smokes too and was wondering if I had heard of weight gain associated with it as a side effect or because of the oral fixation/habit.
I think I later read that it did not cause weight gain.
So just keep taking it, take it easy and don't stress it.
The directions do say to start taking it one week before quitting. But my daughter's friends were seeing a more progressive Dr.
It makes sense that the trying to quit, the focus, stress and pressure makes it harder.
MAYBE buy a second choice brand that you don't like as well? I have to do that sometimes because many places do not carry my brand and certain seconds or third choices, I find I smoke less. Just a thought.

Live

Welcome newcomers! The whole is greater than the sum of its parts, so we will benefit from getting to know you and learn from you. And hope that you derive benefit from us as well.

MsPINKAcres

Good luck!!
Can't wait to see pictures!! - I think I'll keep changing mine since I've found out how. Besides I have 5 grandkids that are very photogenic!! - not that I would be bias any at all - lol

MsPINKAcres

You DID do it!!
Look how cute!!!!!

Hi Candy & Rocky - They sat still better than Payton & Lexi - but my two had a case of the giggles as you can see.

kj0975

YEAH PALM I get so excited to see pics!!! Your babies are cute everyones are. Well just cleaned out the fridge now sweating its to freakin hot I dont know how u guys deal with this in the warmer states I know its alot hotter than its here! Well off to deal with the next task they never end ya know!

Noah812

Cook - Look up Quinlan, Texas in ***** maps...its there though we are outside Quinlan about 200 yards from the Lake.

MsPINKAcres

You are a Pro at this!!!!

Every few days you can change pictures - how sweet is that!!

teke

hey, my ah just called to tell me that because of me, he thinks that its a good idea that he moves out. i guess i wanted to get angry at first and let him have it, but i didn't, i just kindly told him that i do understand.

its all my fault again. i think it hit me that there was no need to argue with him about anything, so i just agreed understandably and got off the phone. told him not to send his son at the clothes, there is not that many anyway so whats the rush. not trying to hold his clothes but until i'm more comfortable, i think that he could just wait.

dont' want to put the clothes outside but i know that he didn't need them all wkend, so he may not need them as much as he wants to say he does.

i just kind of listen to him tell me that he only had 50.00 out of his check and couldn't pay the bill, but i know that if he didn't show up at all this wkend, that he was out using, but since he don't know that i know that, then i guess he felt the need to tell me that so that i wouldn't think that he was using. THAT, he needs to tell to him mom, cause i just don't want to hear it and i just don't buy it. its his life, and i'm not concerned about what he does with his money.

MsPINKAcres

I am simply amazed that ya'll can get them to just move out -

I bow down to your abilities - mine will NOT move out. Never would. Never will. Not voluntarily. Geez how can you get them to be that cooperative????

MsPINKAcres

Yea - I know - didn't mean it that way.

Lived with active addiction/alcoholism in our marriage for 10 plus years - then had him committed to get him out of the house (he wouldn't leave - begged him to) He went into treatment - Wow did he work a wonderful program - 6 months later I started Al-Anon.

A year & 3 months sober he moved back home. It was an adjustment - but it was good living with a husband in recovery. We've been thru some really tough stuff - daughter in & out of rehab - deaths in the family, hurricane, etc - but we both were working our seperate programs.

During the last six - nine months things have changed - Slowly but surely the disease has taken back over in his life. It is so very sad. I have asked him to leave several times, but he won't. He denies he has relapsed. The majority of our friends in the program don't know he is using again. He still "pretends" he is Mr. Recovery - breaks my heart how cunning, baffling and powerful denial can be. - I just have to detach and take care of me.

Wonder why some A's will just walk away and mine thinks he is showing wonderful character by staying? Again Cunning, Baffling and Powerful.

teke

most of the time, japico, my ah knows that if i have to call the police and figure out something to tell them to get them to get him out of the house, that i would. its not his house anyway, its a place that i got for me and the kids, so he won't give me too big of a struggle most of the time, this he has learned over the yrs. there are times that it was hard to do, had to go to court and the works, his mom is the most encouraging one of all when it come to him living with her and not with us, he will listen to her before anyone. so she helps a lot, i think she needs his finacial help, well when ever he don't binge it up and she can only get that when he's living with her.

anyway, this time, i think he may have wanted me to say something other than i understand why he has to move. this time, i kind of allowed him to think that it was his choice to move out and thats ok for me. i almost blew it but seems like i somehow was able to do a little quick thinking. i wanted to just light into his hide.

MsPINKAcres

How miserable it must have been trying to keep all those secrets.

I know for me - it's tough - because I try to avoid our joint friends in recovery. I don't attend any more open AA meetings. A very special friend of ours had a sobriety birthday this past weekend - I couldn't go to the birthday nite - I called him & wished him a Happy Birthday. He knows what is going on so He understood.

I'm trying not to be the wife that tells all my AH's business - just trying to practice the "People will find out what they need to know when they need to know and without any help from ME" rather than trying to force a confrontation or bottom.

It's tough - believe me - I would LOVE to call his sponsors - but it's just not my JOB.

Glad you are doing better now - Glad you are living without that much hate now - must feel so FREE

MsPINKAcres

Teke - I'm glad he is leaving you alone - it would seem that would be easier - I don't know. We are married & it's community property - so if it comes down to him leaving it will be UGLY.

So sad - it's a new house - replaced after the hurricane - we've only been in since 12/23/06 - but hey - it's just a house - my sanity & serenity are more important. I'm really not sure I can continue living with active addiction much longer.

teke

it is a little easier that he decided to leave us alone, but apart of me want him to not want to, but apart of me thinks that his reaction sounds like he expected me to respond in a more negative way. time he opened his mouth, he had to tell me why he didn't pay the bill, and i just told him that i was not concerned about that. he still wanted me to know that he has 50. 00 left after they took the childsupport out of his check. biggest lie that i've ever heard lately, like i don't know what he makes or that he makes double for overtime. he forgot that he told me, i guess about how much he had worked, but yet, he gets a thrill out of saying that i'm a liar. its a waste of time to point out all of his lies and he thinks that i believe them too.

thank god that we don't have any community property, but leave it up to him and his mom, i wouldn't be supprized if he don't try to come up with some. thats something that i'll just have to deal with when the time come.

now if i don't hear from legal aide again tomorrow, i think i'm gonna call them until i do. i think that the more i think about it, the more i'm wondering what am i losing.

man, i looked at my surgeon and for some reason he inspired me. there are some men out there who are not addicts at least and can be responsible,. i've allowed my ah to convince me that i'm the ugliest person around today, and its time that i stop acting like what he says is true.

i went to the dr, fri and met a very attractive older grey haired man, i mean i met him and his look like older women girlfriend and they seem to be so happy together, wonder why i have to believe that i could never love again, because of my age.

ok yall, i know i'm thinking out loud now.lol

cinderellawkids

Thats what they say you have to do, not look back. Thats why I had to remove my pictures from the wall, and now I dont even log in to myspace because SIL has him on her profile pic. Oh well itll get better, but only if I let it

MsPINKAcres

I'm not sure I would want to - that's just the sadness talking

best wishes to you - I hope you do find a wonderful person that is great to you.

teke

i think you are right anvil, i've battled for so long with this, i know what i think is best for me to do, but i know that it has to be for me and that my motives has to be pure or it could backfire on me and cause me more pain than i barganed for. i don't know what will happen in the future though, for now, all i know to do is take it one day at a time and deal with what i have to deal with in that day. first things first. dont know where this is gonna take me but if i just take it as it come, maybe ill acidentally end up in a much better place.

got a call from an older male friend, today, someone that ah seems to hate, but thats ok, i have no interest in this person other than an old family friend who i can talk to about most anything. it was good talking to him, this is someone i knew from childhood when i played softball, his brother was my coach from the age of about 9 yrs old to about 25.

MsPINKAcres

Sounds like you are taking very good care of yourself, Teke - keep up the good work.

Did you play slow pitch or fast pitch softball? I had daughters that played both. One of my daughters played slow pitch for a long time - she was pretty good. We coached her & played in tournaments all summer - LOVED IT.

I started playing when I was 36 on a coed team - I loved it. Played catcher. Was pretty good for a while. But I injured my neck, shoulder & elbow while cleaning up after the storm so I can play anymore - I MISS IT - It was my stress relief.

What position did you play?