Elana

Yes. Today is your Birthday. I am not buying you anything or sending you a card or wishing you well. I know you take great stock in Birthday well wishes and happy returns. Well, I do not care if you have any returns, let alone happy returns or many happy returns. With your drug use and heart disease it is unlikely anyway.

Fact is, you garnered enough happiness out of me in 6 years. The money wasted on your Addict Butt was more than you ever deserved. I did what you wanted and you got a lot of what you wanted.. but you just couldn't live up to your end of the relationship bargain in any manner.

Somehow you have this idea in your head that you are "better" than the street addicts you used to make fun of. Well, I know this will come as a shock, but you are not better. You are the same. You are just a little better at finding people to use than they are.

A year ago you were cheating on me. Your lies were out of control. You were, and are, too much of a coward to ever have a straight conversatin with anyone. You would rather scam and lie and be secretive and all the rest.. than face life, or any person, staright on. I am glad you are gone. Do not darken my doorway again.

Your drug dealing that you excuse by saying you only sold directly to users or other dealers... and would never get a kid involved... is just more of the same BS that addicts say.. and dealers say. Trust me.. if any of those people could make a score with a kid and get money to buy more for themselves, they would. Your arrogance is amazing.

Today I am celebrating your birthday by being good to myself and spending money on ME. I am celebrating your birthday knowing you are still nothing more than another drug addict who does all the things addicts do. I am enjoying this day being extra good to me to make up for all the times I was extra good to you at my expense.

I am enjoying your birthday knowing that you are still scamming.. still living 1/2 step from the street.. still running an angle on some new co dependent girl.. knowing you are still lying to everyone about everything. I am enjoying your birthday knowing that your lifestyle will not bring you many returns and certainly not many happy returns. I am enjoying your birthday celebrating my life.

I am enjoying your birthday knowing I am sooo happy to be free from wasting energy and myself loving you. I am enjoying your birthday loving me instead.

kj0975

Elana in a couple more years u will totally forget when is birthday is. Infact if it wasnt for this post I wouldnt have even remembered that today is my exabf b-day too. I would have just gone on like nothing today nor would I have even thought of him today nor his b-day it takes time but u will eventually forget these little things.

PS THANKS for making me think of that JERK today!!

parentrecovers

hugs, k

jsjohnson72

Good job Elana! There are a lot of words you used in your post that are just like my ex.

Thinks he is better than the street addicts - his sister in law is just as bad as him and he makes fun of her and thinks he is better - he is no better just like you said.

Scamming - Perfect word!! He is always scamming everyone to get what he wants he doesn't care if it is friends and family.

Lying to Everyone about everything - I am just now finding out about lies he has lied to myself and his family about. I got in a car accident and he was in my car when it happened and scammed my insurance company for money and I just found out he got a settlement for that - He never once told me any of this - he even hired an attorney!

I now look back and can see the REAL him! Liar, scammer, loser!! Love definately blinds you!!

I am just glad I don't have to deal with him anymore as well! Isn't it a lot better living life with no drama? I am sure enjoying it!!

patchoulli

YEAH ELANA...I can absolutely relate. With Keith, I was giving so much that his birthday present in July was already given in January, Feb, March...I was always giving him presents early for occasions because he couldn't afford to [visit his kids, razor blades, cologne] etc...It was a pain in the neck because by the time his birthday did come, he forgot all about the presents I already gave[I was such an idiot]. I am glad you are spending the money on yourself today...I love you... come on down, bring the kids...Marian

Wascally Wabbit

I like the last line. Yep, once we get away, we see a lot clearer.

raerae6

your ex sounds a like mine, too. I sure regret the $$ I ever spent on him and wish I would have spent it on myself.

I think when his b-day comes in Oct. I might do something nice for myself that day, too!

Lithloren

((( Elana ))),

I am sorry. I can totally relate to your man-pain! I don't know if you have ever read "The Rules by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider". Or, "The Rules II by Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider". After going back and reading these books again I realized that the problem in my realationship with my ABF isn't really the fact that he is an addict, it's the fact that I didn't maintain my self-esteem. I was too easy.

I have not been posting as much as I used to on this board because I have been spending any free time I have at:

http://wc4.worldcrossing.com/webx?14@@.ef1d0e5

another good website to start with is:

http://www.thesweetgirlsguide.bravehost.com/index.html

Hugs,

Lithloren

mendingheart

You go girl......look how you have grown.
Hugs to you today as you take care of YOU

Elana

Thanks to all. I figured better to write that letter and post it here than even bother trying to say any of it to him. Why waste my time?

BTW I spent the money getting a nice hair cut and then I spent time with my dog and my cats and kitten. I called my sister who told me they went out to eat and I said "Good! You celebrated Steve's Birthday too.. and he wasn't there so it was great!" She laughed and said yeah, they had a great time (my family is big on cards.. and my sister is really great so she knoew it was his B'thdy).

Then I called my Mom and talked to her for awhile.

I relaxed in the recliner and had some Seltzer (with Rasberry 'flavor') and let my cats sit in my lap and purr.. while Atka laid next to us all on the floor. WE had a wonderful close to a really great day!