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Can He Do This

Old 06-08-2007, 10:57 AM
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grateful rca
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Can He Do This

thursday was a day and night of total he**. i mean all evening and all night. i think i finally got to see the other woman, she a much younger woman, and i just don't know what to do with myself today.

he started all of that craziness last evening and before the night was over, he threatened to call the people and have me commited to an asylum. why would he want to slowly drive me crazy? what have i done to deserve all of this?

even though my older kids kind of listen to him and what he's saying about me, they still say that if i am losing my mind and seeing things, it only happens when he's around. they too want to know why is he here.

i called legal aide again this morning, boy do i wish that i had money to hire a lawyer so that i could go ahead and get this behind me. i feel broken. i know that this is a repeat post in some ways but today i need you guys again. this junk is so painful.
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Old 06-08-2007, 11:22 AM
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You have always offered me so wonderful advice.
You did NOTHING, NOTHING, NOTHING to deserve this.
YOU don't deserve this.
I kept thinking the same thing today when my addict started in on me- trying to make me feel like crap.

THEY say things to try to make us believe that we are crazy.
We are not.
They are addicts and will do whatever needs to be done to take the focus off of them and put it elsewhere.
I feel your pain- I know your pain and you are not alone.
I wish I could just wave a magic wand and make all of it go away.
I'm sorry you are hurting.
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Old 06-08-2007, 11:22 AM
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Sweetie is there anything you can do to get him out again? Can you have him evicted?
He wants to drive you insane cause then he doesnt focus on his issues.

Can you stay with one of your grown kids a bit?
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Old 06-08-2007, 11:33 AM
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Teke, I really do believe this is much more than him being on drugs. He is an abusive man, mentally definately. When a man abuses the woman so often they try to make the woman believe they are crazy... its a form of control if you think your crazy or if they make others believe your crazy then they could have total control of you and also take away respect of your opinion from the people close to you if the man is able to convince them that you are crazy.

I want to tell you that you need to get him out of your house. But I guess its not my place to do that but you need to think of yourself, mentally and physcially. He could literally make you go crazy with everything he is pulling in your home.

I am praying for you teke.
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Old 06-08-2007, 11:46 AM
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I don't know you very well but I have been following your posts and I find this so horrible and bizzarre. And I don't understand why you don't call the police and have him removed from the home? He is on drugs. He is acting aggressive and frightening. Call the police and tell them that. They should come pick him up. I don't understand. I am new here but it seems to me like you are letting him get away with this. Please don't be a victim for anymore days.
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Old 06-08-2007, 11:46 AM
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He cannot have you commited. If he is the silver tougned addict a smost are he would probably find it easy to convince others that you are at fault. You have a mild disposition and you are emotionally and mentally strained by AH and his actions. All he does is take it one step further to convince everyone something is wrong with you...there is not...he is the creep honey...dump that loser or just get your stuff and leave. Another thing you could do is, if you have a older son ask him to help you. I have had to take care of my mother from a cruel yet persistant man she dated. I called him and told him the way it was going to be or else...never called mom again...or maybe just a big friend... good luck teke
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Old 06-08-2007, 11:53 AM
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Hey Teke.. Have Strength. YOU did nothing wrong.
You said you own your house. Can you sell it and MOVE? (that is a long term thing I know).

Sorry you are going thru this.
I am praying for you.
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Old 06-08-2007, 11:57 AM
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grateful rca
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no elana, i'm renting this house, i don't own anything, and he has never provided anything for us in all of these yrs. i guess it maybe the fact that i'm so much older today, i don't know. i honestly thought that i was doing what god wanted me to do, today i know that i've been living in deception.
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:00 PM
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no blues, we don't have anything together, not even one piece of furniture, tv or anything, he's been on drugs the whole time. spent most every other wk's pay, all of drugs. this is the place that god helped me to provide for me and the kids, as well as the other places that i've lived.
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:04 PM
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teke - if his name isn't on the lease, i'm pretty sure you can have him evicted, i know you wanted to get some $ from him first for bills - but is all this pain really worth it? you've managed before without and i'd bet my paycheck that you can do it again. you are a very strong capable woman, do not let him tell you different.
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:07 PM
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((((teke))))

if your very best friend in the whole world were going thru this what would you do for them how would you help them? Step back a little (((((teke))))) you don't have to take this [email protected] ..... you are too smart, you are strong and you can use your very good mind....

Last edited by deedee; 06-10-2007 at 06:45 AM.
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:08 PM
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teke .. Good advice above ..stay strong don't let him get to you...you're NOT crazy..just do what you need to do an don't react to him..I've seen guys do this same thing that weren't addicts, they are mentally unbalanced.
Sending prayers your way.
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:10 PM
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If his name is not on the lease, having him removed is very, very easy.
You just call the police and tell them you want him removed and they will remove him.
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:23 PM
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i imagine it sounds like i'm not really paying you all and your advice much attention, but i am, i think that its only a matter of making that decision. letting go completely is something that i just didnt want to do but i do know that its time. this time, it don't feel like all the other times, i do feel the end and i'm just i guess i'm now accepting this fact. yall please don't give up on me right now, i have no one else to help me through all of this
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:24 PM
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Originally Posted by teke View Post
i imagine it sounds like i'm not really paying you all and your advice much attention, but i am, i think that its only a matter of making that decision. letting go completely is something that i just didnt want to do but i do know that its time. this time, it don't feel like all the other times, i do feel the end and i'm just i guess i'm now accepting this fact. yall please don't give up on me right now, i have no one else to help me through all of this

I know exactly how you feel with that and believe me, most of us understand
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:26 PM
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we do all understand and no one is giving up on you.
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:29 PM
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Ohh teke I am not giving up you and dont ever think that for one minute. I am just concerned and worried about you. We will be with you regardless of what and when you decide... okay teke. Its just that when I care about someone (you) I worry and want whats best for them.

hugs,
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:32 PM
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Whatever we may suggest are just options for you to consider, nothing more.

I believe in you, Teke.
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:35 PM
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dahlin' your words have warmed me when I felt very cold and alone I could never give up on you...
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Old 06-08-2007, 12:39 PM
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Teke.

What decision are your struggling with? What decision do you feel comfortable with? Do you feel comfortable deciding you deserve to be safe? Can you take a step to ensure that?

You don't have to let go or solve the entire situation completely today. Rome wasn't built in a day. You don't have to call the police. But can you do one small thing that works towards a solution?

Letting go doesn't happen all at once. However, you deserve to be in a safe and sane place in order to plan your next step - whatever that is. Can you get yourself somewhere that the environment is not so toxic so you can think logically? Didn't you just leave and go stay at your moms for a few days last week? Can you do that again?
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