6 ittybitty days
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Hurricane Alley, Fl
Posts: 119
6 ittybitty days
...before he trashed this fresh opportunity.
Last Saturday, he sat thoughtful and sober at breakfast, writing down what he would be willing to do if he could stay with me for a while longer. Nice list.
Last nite, casually mentions he is running out of suboxone and will probably be getting sick. Then sits, waiting for me to say something.
I do not bat an eyelash.
Well, I finally say, there is an outpatient detox on a sliding scale. There are doctors. He has money.
He nixes both of them quickly. I ask if he has called his sponsor about this? No.
I am thinking: What, exactly, is he trying to say here?
I had believed that he was not on anything, including suboxone. & if he was on suboxone, why would he have not made a detox/dr. appt earlier, before the day it would run out?
I don't know what he gets out of making sure he will get some withdrawal stuff?
This morning, he wakes up very late; sharing a ride to drop him off, he asks if I can pick him up at 3 in the afternoon? "I don't know if I can get off that early," I say; he then hits the side of the car door. "Why didn't you get me up?" he spits out.
& then I yell.
I never yell.
"It is your @$%&^*()XX responsibility!"
He demands that I stop the car. I do. He slams out the door.
Into the rain. I go to work.
Six days.
He will probably lose his job, because he has already lost days of work.
The question for me is what will I do now? 48 hours? Give him a bus ticket and $50 right now and send him on his way?
Will I be strong enough?
In the past, I have had to oust my nephew for alcoholism, my brother, too. But that's been 10 and 15 years ago, respectively.
I am really tired.
Thanks~~~
Last Saturday, he sat thoughtful and sober at breakfast, writing down what he would be willing to do if he could stay with me for a while longer. Nice list.
Last nite, casually mentions he is running out of suboxone and will probably be getting sick. Then sits, waiting for me to say something.
I do not bat an eyelash.
Well, I finally say, there is an outpatient detox on a sliding scale. There are doctors. He has money.
He nixes both of them quickly. I ask if he has called his sponsor about this? No.
I am thinking: What, exactly, is he trying to say here?
I had believed that he was not on anything, including suboxone. & if he was on suboxone, why would he have not made a detox/dr. appt earlier, before the day it would run out?
I don't know what he gets out of making sure he will get some withdrawal stuff?
This morning, he wakes up very late; sharing a ride to drop him off, he asks if I can pick him up at 3 in the afternoon? "I don't know if I can get off that early," I say; he then hits the side of the car door. "Why didn't you get me up?" he spits out.
& then I yell.
I never yell.
"It is your @$%&^*()XX responsibility!"
He demands that I stop the car. I do. He slams out the door.
Into the rain. I go to work.
Six days.
He will probably lose his job, because he has already lost days of work.
The question for me is what will I do now? 48 hours? Give him a bus ticket and $50 right now and send him on his way?
Will I be strong enough?
In the past, I have had to oust my nephew for alcoholism, my brother, too. But that's been 10 and 15 years ago, respectively.
I am really tired.
Thanks~~~
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: The Burgh
Posts: 1,991
((((Nite))))
Your story is beginning to sound very similar to mine...although I didn't have half the knowledge you have at this stage of the dance.
My son also played the game, just long and convincing enough to suck me in for quite a while.
He OD'd and swore he would get help...he did...in the way of detox and on to OP, which lasted about two weeks.
He wanted drugs to help him. Can't blame him really, a pill for pill sounds a lot easier.
But that option wasn't made available in his short stay with OP.
Another OD incident and I put him on a list for a bed in inpatient. He was going to lose his comfy home, and his relatively easy life had he not agreed.
SO off he went to inpateint...28 days...and used the first day he returned.
I wanted so bad to believe he was sober. I wanted so bad to believe the worst was over. And more than anything I wanted so bad NOT to have to kick him out.
He had his Dad's to run to...kicking him out would only have removed him from my life, something I don't think he was very concerned about at the time.
But eventually (and a missing playstation and some petty cash later) he started changing. Looking back I think it had to run its course...trouble everywhere he turned, losing his lisence, his GF, close to losing his family (at least as he had come to know us).
I began seeing progress, less blaming more effort (the biggest being the changing of people places things.
Today he's doing well...better than I dreamed possible two years ago, and I am thankful, everyday.
You do what you need to do to stay sane, leave his choices to him. trust your gut, heart and brain...and of course your meetings.
Prayers he finds his way...
((((hugs))))
Cece
Your story is beginning to sound very similar to mine...although I didn't have half the knowledge you have at this stage of the dance.
My son also played the game, just long and convincing enough to suck me in for quite a while.
He OD'd and swore he would get help...he did...in the way of detox and on to OP, which lasted about two weeks.
He wanted drugs to help him. Can't blame him really, a pill for pill sounds a lot easier.
But that option wasn't made available in his short stay with OP.
Another OD incident and I put him on a list for a bed in inpatient. He was going to lose his comfy home, and his relatively easy life had he not agreed.
SO off he went to inpateint...28 days...and used the first day he returned.
I wanted so bad to believe he was sober. I wanted so bad to believe the worst was over. And more than anything I wanted so bad NOT to have to kick him out.
He had his Dad's to run to...kicking him out would only have removed him from my life, something I don't think he was very concerned about at the time.
But eventually (and a missing playstation and some petty cash later) he started changing. Looking back I think it had to run its course...trouble everywhere he turned, losing his lisence, his GF, close to losing his family (at least as he had come to know us).
I began seeing progress, less blaming more effort (the biggest being the changing of people places things.
Today he's doing well...better than I dreamed possible two years ago, and I am thankful, everyday.
You do what you need to do to stay sane, leave his choices to him. trust your gut, heart and brain...and of course your meetings.
Prayers he finds his way...
((((hugs))))
Cece
Bridge CLOSED
Join Date: Nov 2003
Location: No ones business
Posts: 1,497
Originally Posted by Nitelite 
...
Give him a bus ticket and $50 right now and send him on his way?
Give him a bus ticket and $50 right now and send him on his way?
Originally Posted by Nitelite
...I am really tired.
Sorry if this is blunt, but 6 days does not sobriety make (tho every journey starts with a first step).
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