Jewelz

Hey guys good morning..

I am so angry this morning angry and sad. My daughter's picture was in the NY Times twice yesterday for the Fresh Air Fund. I called her fathers girlfriend she was the first person I called to let her know. She said I have it in front of me, but I am at work I will call her dad so he could call her. That was at ten in the morning yesterday can you believe the man didnt even call her. How can you leave your child like that... I mean come on your daughters pic was in the NY times twice that is not something that happens normally and he couldnt call her. He doesnt have addiction or active alcoholism to use as an excuse. I want to tell him off so bad. I sent his girlfriend a text that its sad he didnt call, she waited once again for a phone call, and that i dont have to say a negative thing about him to her because he does welll on his own.

cinderellawkids

Im sorry Jewelz

kj0975

Jewelz I'm so sorry I dont blame u one bit its hard to sit there while your child gets hurt. Sounds like he is just selfish and he doesnt even have an excuse but I'm sure he will find one. Its just a shame. Hopefully he will turn it around b4 its too late and she wont want to talk to him at all. My dad was the same way. Its hard cause kids dont forget that stuff and it will be awhile for him to rebuild that relationship.

Well the dishes are done now on to the next project.

Jewelz

Cindi, Kg thanks.. I really dont think he will turn it around. He is letting himself get farther farther away from her emotionally. I believe he thinks just because he sends a check every week that is where the obligation ends. He doesnt realize that his kids is all he has when it comes down to it and he will find himself alone.. I just know it and she wont want to be bothered. That hurts me because I know deep down he loves her he just... I dont even know what to say cause it hurts to see her hurting. He was her daddy for the first five years of her life, was with me for everything that had to do with her and to just push her away because he didnt want to be with me just makes no sense.

ahhh I just want to scream at him.

Jewel

finallyout

jewlez i'm sorry too, that really sucks for her. i know when i turned 13 my dad pulled away from me big time and we lived in the same house. to this day our relationship is still very strained. i know he loves me in his own way but i can't help feeling like i did not become the person he wanted me to be and that i've let him down. if i were you, i would scream at him, sometimes men just don't think about the damage they are doing long term to their kids. anyway, i think its really cool that her pic was in the paper. something to frame for the wall, right?

Lovestoomuch

Good morning everybody!! I finally got some sleep last night. I called into work this morning for fear Stephanie would go into labor and I'd be 100 miles further away from her than I need to be. This week will be iffy. Her actual due date is Friday, but like helpus, I don't think she's going to make it that long.

Haaaaaa........you guys come her and get my child to do squats. Good luck with that one. I can't even get her out of bed until at least noon. LOL

Sorry about your daughter's dad Jewelz. You know, Stephanie's dad hasn't even called her once and he's fixin to be a grandfather!!! I'd love to find the tallest tree and hang him from it. Steph says she doesn't care anymore. She said she's used to it and has chosen my ex-husband to be the grandfather. It's sad........

kj0975

Well Loves I was hoping she would make it to saturday thats my b-day but sounds like shes not gonna make it. U keep us posted even if u need to bring a laptop to the hospital we need to know everything. lol. Well off to clean the bathroom that the cat trashed while we were gone.

finallyout

omg -you guys i just said "i'm fixing to do this..." god i need to get out of this state! don't get me wrong the south is beautiful, but us girls from philly do not say "i'm fixing" to do anything!!! help me before i get the accent too! ha ha ha!

Jewelz

finally, I would scream at him... been there done that and it only makes it harder for my daughter. The last argument we had was in the middle of Times Square at 42 street and he was acting all nasty like his skinney behind could do something to me and I look at him and said You are just a miserable person, you chosed this life... you are just miserbale, the man looked at me and didnt say a word.

It didnt have have to be this way, I was hurt when he left but I have been over that for years. He is just a man who is searching for happiness, but doesn't realize the happiness he is looking for could be with his own daughter.

I sure do pick lousy men!

Jewelz

finally, you probably already have a touch of the accent already, LOl.

How long have you been in the south?

Jewel

finallyout

hey kj, i was just at the posts from the weekend and your pics are sooo beautiful - where did yous go? my kids would love it there, they love camping, its kinda growing on me too.

finallyout

jewelz- apparently too long! only about 5 months now. if i start saying "yall", i'm outta here! you guys from the south, know i'm just kidding right!

Lovestoomuch

You know..........I don't even realize I'm doing it.......lol..........can we say "It's a southern thang"? It's not proper I know...............it's just a bad habbit.

finallyout

jewelz- remember he may be a lousy man but at least you got a great daughter out of the relationship - she just needs to be reminded that its HIS loss not hers if he doesn't want a relationship with her.

cinderellawkids

Loves, when she starts to moan in pain, if you can get herin the squatng position just once, she'll realize its much better to stay that way, and somehow it helps increase dilation.
Pulled out my pregnancy book, when you lose your mucus plug labor is expected in 1 to 3 days. (course labor can last a long time, thats why I always convinced them to induce. a little pitocin and 6 hours tops and only 45 minutes or less of puching and I had three beautiful kids, now I wanna run home and hug them.)

Jewelz, my dad was the same way too, and still is. I hear from him when he feels empty inside and reaches out for his own void to be filled. Im thinking since I spouted off and hung up on my step momster in January havent talked to ehr, step brother or the halfsister I ahrdly know. Maybe its time for me to apologize and reach out. (course I question my motives, a bit, but Hey I need help..Im screwed up too.) Maybe with them in my life it'll give me the kick I need to move forward with letting go of AH.

cinderellawkids

Do you guys find it hard to see childhood friends that are successful?
I saw alot of guys I knew and grew up with this weekend, all have beautiful families houses ect. I chose a different path and found exactly what I was told I would...nothing, emptiness and heartache over and over.
I know you cant look back, but how can you move forward to change it?

finallyout

omg cindi - i've been having such a hard time with old friends lately - someone i was very close to in high school ran in to ah and wanted me to call her. but shes since gotten married, had two kids, beautiful house etc etc and shes still skinny damn it. part of me would love to talk to her again - but it just depresses me how great her life turned out compared to mine and i guess i'm a little jealous too. i don't know how to change those feelings exactly, i'm trying to remember something i read about how everyone has some battle or problem in their life and if though may look great on the outside no ones life is really perfect. i guess thats true but it will be a long time before i can talk to her again.

kj0975

We camped in Alexandria Bay I think in the Thousand Islands or around there I'm not too good with that stuff. It was really beautiful and peaceful.

cindy I have tone of successful friends from school and it gets me down too. I know they have their own issues though so that helps some. One is a neurosurgeon and another a pharmacist and one runs HSBC bank the list goes on and on they are all beautiful have beautiful houses and seems to have it all. But I know they dont they just followed a different path. Their parents paid for schooling and everything else while I just had to work full time and go to school and just didnt finish. I get resentful at my parents sometimes that they would do that for me now I feel its too late but I know its not. I want to do something I love doing a career move.

Lovestoomuch

I'm lucky in this situation I guess. I never had many childhood friends........or at least any I ever kept in touch with. I've moved around so much that I never really developed any lasting friendships. BUT........if I had, I'd probably be jealous......more than likely down on myself for the choices I made too.

We have to look at it like this though. HP has a plan for each of us and I believe he chooses certain paths we have to take. We may not always understand why some were chosen to be rich and famous and we were chosen to go through trial after trial. But.......I've heard it said that HP uses the ones he sees most likely to be able to mold into his image to be put through the worst of the worst. I mean......look at everything Noah, Joseph, and all the other biblical people had to go through.

I always sort of felt special being chosen to go through the ********. I guess HP sees something in me that I don't.

Elana

I went to my first HS reunion and discovered I was one of the successful ones. I was a Full Time Dairy Farmer and was not looked at as successful, but I really was. I was pulling in $225,000 gross every year and paying my bills and I owned a farm. I thought that was success. I still think that is success, tho I now do something different.
There were others who were wildly more successful than I and others who were wildly unsuccessful.

I was OK. That is what counted to me. I don't compare my success to others lack or greater success. I am STILL OK.

I also chose not to have children and chose to devote my life to animals. There are many here who would tell me I am poorer as a result. I don't think I am, but that is the point. It is not how we compare to others, but how we choose to live our own lives.

Cinder and Finally Out, KJ ANYONE, how can you EVER look at yourselves and think less of YOU than someone else? You are as good as anyone. You are also young. You can have any success you want. You can even go back to school. Is it EZ? Nope. Does it have the potential to make your lives easier? You betcha and you CAN DO ANYTHING YOU WANT TO. It may mean battling emotional issues and physical issues but you can do it if you WANT TO.

People used to say those words to me and I would think "Yeah.. right! How?"

The first step is to look at yourself as capable young women with life experiences that go far beyond money and position. You need to see your own strength and follow your path with a "can do it" (and damn the torpedos or something like that)!