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Old 05-24-2007, 09:50 PM
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Baker Act

This morning a friend of Desi's called and told me he went to her house and she was suicidal, she had started a fire in the house which burned only the rug, and she was talking about crack pipes and guns. He called the police and they took her to the crisis unit. I'm glad she is there, I love her, I hurt for her, and I hope she finds the help that she needs so desperately. I bought a waterpump for her house and my friend installed it for me. I cleaned, brought out lots of garbage, cut out the burn[about 2 feet in diameter], from my grandsons bedroom, The place is disgusting but with a little time and money it will be fine. More importantly I am fine, my little Xander is fine and my mom is fine. She worked for DCS before she retired and contacted an old co worker. The woman told her to tell me to call her[10:00 pm]. I did. My mom is applying for temporary custody until the front porch roof is replaced on my house[about 2 weeks]. I will still have Xander 3-4 nites a week but I don't want my house inspected until the roof is on. I don't want anything to go against us in court. I even told the worker that my daughter left my grandson home alone at 4:30 in the morning to wander up to the gas station covered only in a blanket. I feel a little guilty, this happened the day after I set my boundaries and stuck to them. I found so many new clothes in her house, hundreds of dollars of make up, it almost looks like instead of digging into the heaps of clean clothes she had piled up, she just kept getting new ones....It doesn't matter, the chaos is overwhelming, I feel at peace, Xander is safe, My daughter is alive and I thank god...Thank you for caring for me and my family. Marian
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Old 05-24-2007, 10:17 PM
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Patch, I'm glad she is safe and so glad that you and your little guy are safe too. I hope she can get the help she needs and find her way back to her son, but he is in good hands with you and your mom.

I found so many new clothes in her house, hundreds of dollars of make up, it almost looks like instead of digging into the heaps of clean clothes she had piled up, she just kept getting new ones
My oldest went through that too, and at the time I said I believed she bought new rather than do laundry. It seemed particularly extreme when she was binge drinking and doing coke. She has since spoken about it as another extension of her addictive personality...wanting to buy new things to feel better when she felt depressed, etc. Working her program has made positive changes in this as well. Hugs and prayers
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Old 05-24-2007, 10:22 PM
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I am glad that your AD is safe. I pray for you and your family and her recovery.
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Old 05-24-2007, 11:33 PM
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I'm so glad your AD is getting some help. Baby is fine, Mom is fine and you are at peace. Sounds like you really took control of a bad situation.

The people on this site really do care for us and our families. We hold each other up.

Blessings...........Lo
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Old 05-24-2007, 11:44 PM
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I'm so glad she is safe, and that you and the baby are as well.

I was thinking about the money she spent on all those new clothes,
better clothes than drugs. I think I went or I know I went through
a time when I bought new "things" esp. gadgets, I still have that
instinct, but I'm too paranoid about money now, after being getting
so down and out during my use, being broke scares me to death,
but I think that is a normal thing, we are always looking for something
to fill us up... or throughout my life I seem to have been, even when
I am happy,, I always always want more more and more....
lol, Being a 'go getter' is also one of my weaknesses I am never
content with what I have or where I am...
Or something like that....
I will say some extra prayers and send some good vibes her way tonight.
(and yours)....
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Old 05-25-2007, 04:36 AM
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Marian, I am so glad that she is where she is. Hopefully she will get the help she needs. Your grandson is safe with you and that is a good thing. He is young and probably will not remember much of what he went through. With you love and care he will be okay. My daughter was the same way. She had closets full of clothes but kept wearing the same things over and over. Never washed them. Now I have her clothes upstairs in my attic. She does not ask for them so I am assuming that she either has bought more (not likely) or she is wearing the same black sweatpants that I have seen her in three times in a row. Hugs, Marle
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Old 05-25-2007, 04:38 AM
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Im glad tonite's she's safe. I hope the system works for you and your family. With BIL they hold him 72 hours, send him to detox and in 10 days he'd be on the street, with his name on a waiting list. I pray your daughter begs for help so they keep her as long as they can. Im so glad Xander is safe and your keeping your head clear. We are all here for you. Keep us updated

The shopping thing somehow cures a void
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Old 05-25-2007, 06:02 AM
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Sounds like the situation is getting better. Your daughter will get some help and Xander is safe.
Here is a big ((HUG)) for you and Xander.
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Old 05-25-2007, 07:29 AM
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((((((Marian)))))))

I'm so glad your ad is safe, and that you and Xander are moving forward.
Your all in my thoughts and prayers today.
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Old 05-25-2007, 08:18 AM
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(((Patch))) Big believer in the "Babies First" rule. Glad you are there for him, and my prayers that this can be his mama's time.

((Hugs))
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Old 05-25-2007, 09:06 AM
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Patch,
I let out a big sigh of relief, knowing she's somewhere safe, and SO happy baby Xander is safe too...

Hugs to you,
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Old 05-25-2007, 09:46 AM
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oh marian, i am so glad all is safe.my prayers are with all of you.do not feel guillty about anything.she would get high no matter what you did or did not do.hugs,hope
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Old 05-25-2007, 05:40 PM
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DCF inspected my home today. She called me and wanted to meet and talk tomorrow. I bit the bullet and told her about my porch and the fact that I really wanted him with me, not my mom but I was afraid that the porch roof would create a problem. She came in, looked at where he would be sleeping, looked in the fridge and said the house is fine[WHEW} My daughter did sign a paper saying I have temporary guardianship but we have to go to court next week to prove she is not capable of taking care of him at this time. I told the case worker about her 4 am jaunt with only a blanket on, leaving my Xander alone in the house without a diaper and about the fire she set in his room after I already had taken him. She's getting a copy of the police report. Desi is still in the crisis unit, nasty and blaming everyone but herself. I do need to say that although she could have done better managing her finances, she was always a wonderful mom which is what makes this so hard to fathom. All is well here. I did ask for assistance with daycare as I will have to pay the mortgage on her house and keep the utilities on[I financed the home for her and she has been good with the payments until now]. I'll let tomorrow handle itself for now. Peace everyone...Marian
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Old 05-25-2007, 07:16 PM
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I hope she stays and does well. Maybe when she is sober enough and realizes the harm she put her baby in it will matter.
Prayers for you all
susan
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Old 05-25-2007, 08:45 PM
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This is a huge relief for you. Just knowing Daughter is safe, getting help,. and baby is with you sets your mind at peace.
I hope things continue upward for you all.
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Old 05-26-2007, 12:39 AM
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(((((Patch)))))
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Old 05-26-2007, 06:22 AM
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Marian, My prayers continue. Since you have been through this before, you know that although it hurts, the blaming is really about her. She hates herself and is projecting that hatred onto whomever happens to be in front of her. Stay strong and I am thankful that DCF found everything to be okay. Hugs, Marle
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