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A Penny For Your Thoughts, Part 10

Old 05-25-2007, 11:55 AM
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I was the cutest one too Blues. This girl may catch up with me when she no longer feels so hopeless, but Im the put together one. They all directed their comments to me being new, so I had to let them know where I was
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Old 05-25-2007, 12:20 PM
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good to hear the mtg went well cindi, i haven't been to a live one in months either - since i moved here- still getting up the courage to go, i hate walking into those alone. its good that someone your age was there, that was on thing with the mtgs i went to most of the people were 20yrs older than me - although i have to see, i learned alot from them.
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Old 05-25-2007, 12:29 PM
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Here's the trick Finally, sit in your car and walk in ebhind someone late...
it makes it easier. LOL

I met a woman whod lost everything through her exs addiction, divorced, remarried someone from alanon and 10 years later she still nods her head when I talked about the repeated phone calls late at night, why cause her ex still does that. And just last week showed up at 2 am asking for money.
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Old 05-25-2007, 12:31 PM
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omg, 10yrs and hes still bugging her. thats when its time to change #'s, & make sure your unlisted. i may try the walking in behind someone else trick LOL.
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Old 05-25-2007, 12:36 PM
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Finally, why are you going to PA again?
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Old 05-25-2007, 12:39 PM
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Glad the meeting went well.. I used to go to naranon meetings a couple of years ago. All of the people there were "old timers" they related to me and it always felt good when I left but I used to wish that there were people my age at the meetings so i could relate more. But the time and place of the meetings were are so inconvienent for me that I can't go anymore. You would think that me living in nyc there would be plenty of meetings in the boro I live in... esspecially this boro I live in in the bronx...there are drugs all over the place, every corner, every place you look but no meetings.

My first meeting I was so scared just standing outside of the church and this man walked up to me and asked what meeting are you going to I said naranon, he said he was part of NA. I didn't know what to say because at the time in my head I looked at him like the enemy. He looked at me and said dont worry your in a safe place, I know how you feel, my first NA meeting I felt like I had cement on my feet but it gets better just go in. If it wasn't for that man, recovering addict I probably would have never gone inside.

Thanks for the reminder Cindi...

I gotta be honest here I am worried about teke.

Jewel
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Old 05-25-2007, 12:45 PM
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Jewelz, Where I live is referred to by school age kids as cracktona. Its everywhere, you can even get some for free in the right places. Alcoholism runs rampant and bars give free drinks for sobriety chips. Yet There are No NA meetings Saturday after noon? and only 1 SUnday mornings in a 40 minute radius. There is NO naranon and only 1 lunch hour alanon meeting and 1 alanon meeting with a nursery (which I wouldnt use) There are 3 rehabs with less than a total of 20 beds and those are in the middle of the worst neighborhoods.

Its sad but sometimes the worst areas have the least recovery centers
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Old 05-25-2007, 12:48 PM
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Im trying to not worry about Teke. But I was thinking, last time we saw her the thread had a bit of painful things discussing cheating. I rememeber knowing it didnt apply to me but the drama of it was too much. One of her last posts said it was a touchy subject. So maybe she just needed a drama break. I think she's probably okay and will be back after some time.

My question is what do we do at 500? Start a new thread in her memory and saying that?
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Old 05-25-2007, 12:50 PM
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I dont think so not in memory sound likes something much worse than her taking a breake. I think she would just appreciate us keeping it going with the same title.
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Old 05-25-2007, 12:51 PM
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Originally Posted by blues View Post
i have more trouble at the end of the meeting than at the beginning...everyone hugging each other like they're all old friends and it's like i can't get out of there fast enough...everyone is really nice - don't know why i feel that way...never really have a problem walking in...

jewelz - it's the same where i live - lots of alanon... only one naranon and not an effective meeting. this is a big city...

hope teke is ok too...guess there's nothing we can do about it...

I have trouble touching everyones hands for the chant at the end. I like NA's arms around the back better
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Old 05-25-2007, 12:56 PM
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My kids are being honary and chore refusant. Darius was up at 6 am watching Tv. I grounded him, cause I was sleeping so he didnt ask,(during school I could barely get him up by 7).

I think I meant honor, Im bad with words
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Old 05-25-2007, 01:00 PM
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I wanna be home!!!!
This day is to much but when I leave I ahve drive cross town for everyone then go pick up my new computer, I doubt Ill get home before 8. Then i gotta make stuff for tomorrows "Make believe vacation" We are hanging out on an elegant pool deck all day Sat and Monday pretending we are on vacation. Theres a awesome kiddie pool with a slide and a palm tree in the middle, 2 larger outddoor pools with slides, 2 jacuszzis and an indoor heated pool, game room and weight room. Fun fun fun all on the beach. My mom, stepdad, sis and her man and the kids will eb there.
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Old 05-25-2007, 01:13 PM
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well cindi, where do i begin, all the reasons i'm going to pa - first of all, i told him if he was clean (which he is) he can see the kids, the kids are really missing him too, i need to get his truck title out of my name and into his co name, i need to have a long face to face chat with his enabling mother, whom i love dearly, but still doesn't "get" it, if you know what i mean, i dying to see my best friend and oh yeah, i miss him desperately and need to get the hell out of MD before my parents drive me to drink! ok probably a bad joke here, sorry. your weekend sounds like a lot of fun, i'm sure the boys will love it.
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Old 05-25-2007, 01:14 PM
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i like the idea of keeping this going in honor of teke. if i were her and saw that i'd be touched.
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Old 05-25-2007, 01:18 PM
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(I didnt realize he was there)Just becareful Finally,with your emotions. My kids were always dieing to see Ah too. And my middle child walks around saying Daddys coming to have crab legs with me when he has some money. My oldest who was always close to him I know would be thrilled to see him but I think is having inner conflicts he's mad, mad about the past, and mad that he hasnt fixed himself yet so he can be with us. and me, im not strong enough. I miss him terribly and if I see him I may grab on and not let go
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Old 05-25-2007, 01:28 PM
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oh i agree, definatley gonna keep things at arms length. my kids are adjusting to the fact that they don't live with daddy, as long as my husband keeps his promise to me about not promising the kids anything (like we'll be together soon talk) it should be ok. he and i made an agreement that this weekend is about the kids and just enjoying our time together and me teaching him certain things about running his co so he can do them for himself and not ask me to do it. which will be a big stress reliever for me. i think its a positive step that he wants to take care of his own stuff instead getting me to do it. besides i can't grab on and not let go anymore, i have a decent peaceful life in MD and my kids are still in school for another 2 wks and i have my job so, no, theres no going back to PA in my future, at least not until hes been clean a lot longer than 2 months. i'm just really excited to go home and see everyone, not just him.
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Old 05-25-2007, 01:31 PM
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Good it sounds like you have it worked out. Im having a tough time today. Not sure why.

...and I have this awful nagging feeling my peace will be sabatoged.
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Old 05-25-2007, 01:35 PM
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cindi, like blues said - focus on that weekend in the jacuzzi. he can only ruin your peace if you let him, now say that over and over till you actually believe it. unplug the phone again if you have to. don't ya just hate those nagging feelings, i hope it turns out to be wrong. i really hope your weekend turns out ok, just check in with us here, i'm gonna use my inlaws computer to check in too.
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Old 05-25-2007, 01:44 PM
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ok everyone, i'm off to get the kids, load the car, feed the kids and get on the road - i really hope the traffic isn't to terrible - i just got my 2yr old pretty well potty trained, i'd hate to have to put the diaper back on for the car ride. oh well, i'll check in tommorrow. hope everyone has a nice peaceful, relaxing, holiday weekend! cindi, take a swim for me too!
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Old 05-25-2007, 01:48 PM
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We kicked butt today. And then I helped hubby for a little bit..offloading stored pieces from the foundation of a houseboat he was building but has been in storage just like everything else.
Came on home, the lounge chair and a water. The laundry is still on the line and there are dishes to wash.
But for awhile, I am going to knit.
I'm home alone!
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