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why they don't voluntarily go to treatment

Old 05-19-2007, 07:53 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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What's even more confusing about addiction is when they finally WANT to go to rehab, and get kicked out.
This happend with my son.
He really does not understand why they kicked him out. The people said "he's just not ready". He wasn't following the curfew rules. He was very happy there.
But, he disobeyed the curfew rule and was immediately kicked out.
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Old 05-19-2007, 08:14 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Wascally Wabbit View Post
What's even more confusing about addiction is when they finally WANT to go to rehab, and get kicked out.
This happend with my son.
He really does not understand why they kicked him out. The people said "he's just not ready". He wasn't following the curfew rules. He was very happy there.
But, he disobeyed the curfew rule and was immediately kicked out.
I dunno, I think they kick people out too much. This is different... but kind of the same when I was in treatment for my e.d. I was in one of the top e.d. treatment
centers, they have one of the highest success rates. Let me tell you they were/are
so strict with you when you get there, and while you are on levels 1-3, especially
1 & 2, you are "treated like you have an e.d." you are followed to the bathroom,
and "watched" embarrasing as all hell, yes, but they do what they have to do,
you eat with a nurse, etc. when you mess up, you get called on it big time, but never once did anyone get kicked out, and people that I was in with did some
pretty whacked stuff, they just didn't do that. They knew when you went in you weren't capable of taking care of yourself that is why you were paying them thousands of dollars.
lol, I even ran away after or in middle of a horrible group session, arghh,
and the owner of the place found me it was in the middle of nowhere,
they brought me back, and I just got therapaptized by a million people, and
watched like a hawk, but not kicked out. omg, I would have been devasted
if they kicked me out, I was just completely overwhelmed and had never
dealt with emotions like that before... it was too much for me..
(and they knew that)

I recently watched a documentary of 5 girls at an ed treatment center, they treated them more like drug treatments do, they were free to leave, they could eat if they wanted to or not, bathrooms were open, they got away w/ alot of stuff, then they kicked one of the girls out, this is at a famous e.d. hospital....
All 5 of those girls relapsed either the day they got home, or within the week.
And they are all still doing bad (all but one).

Just seems to me that possibly for some it may work if they were more strict with them in the beginning at least. If you give people rules they will follow them, if you enforce them hard enough. My ed hospital was so hard core but it save my life.
I hated that place so bad the first week I thought I was going to die, lol, everyone does, but you end up loving it...

I dunno, I could be wrong, just a point of view..
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Old 05-19-2007, 08:19 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Wascally Wabbit -

I can only imagine how painful this has been for you. To get there and then have that happen.....it just doesn't make sense. Nothing makes sense in the land of addiction. I think that I am finally finally beginning to understand that.

My RAH has a really tough time following rules.....he just thinks that some of them really don't matter. A lot of recovery is about taking suggestions (and rules while in rehab) that don't make sense at the time. I think that they (the rehab people) must be looking for a willingness.....I hear it all of the time "are you willing to do whatever it takes to get sober?" It's probably hard for someone new to recovery to understand that the people trying to help them mean ANYTHING. I've heard sponsors suggest some odd things - finally have begun to understand that it's all about becoming willing to listen to someone else.

My heart goes out to you and your son.

Donna
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Old 05-19-2007, 08:21 PM
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I think alot of times its fear of feeling. My AH is in a house with no power food soap ect, so not like him. Im sure he continues worse then before because he doesnt want to accept where he's gotten himself thats a scarey place for a prideful person, he's ratheer live a fantasy convincing himself this is not his life
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Old 05-19-2007, 11:51 PM
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addicts use because they are addict in denial and sick and they stop when they are so sick that they are dying, the drugs don't work or they have that moment of clarity.

Instead of learning about addicts on a tv show learn about recovery right here and places like this.

Kevin
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Old 05-20-2007, 01:05 AM
  # 26 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by splendra View Post
I think they are so full of fear of change and just fear in general. Then of course if they have a lot of support in place(codies who take responsibility for them) they have no need to change especially if it has been going on for years.

I agree, I think it is fear. My AS went into rehab in Jan and while he wanted to be clean he couldn't imagine his life without drugs. When he went into rehab, I educated myself on codie issues, and I won't kid you, it was not easy for either of us. We both have a lot to learn but he is working a program big time and I am learning how to support him and not get in the way of his recovery.... I hope!

Best of luck.


CIM
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Old 05-20-2007, 01:15 AM
  # 27 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Wascally Wabbit View Post
What's even more confusing about addiction is when they finally WANT to go to rehab, and get kicked out.
This happend with my son.
He really does not understand why they kicked him out. The people said "he's just not ready". He wasn't following the curfew rules. He was very happy there.
But, he disobeyed the curfew rule and was immediately kicked out.
Rabbit, I say this with much love and concern. I think the first thing addicts need to learn is that that there are rules and they must be followed. For an addict, this is hard to accept. They are used to negotiating their own terms. I personally think that following rules that they don't agree with or understand is part of the recovery process. Rules are like laws... you folllow them or you don't. Before any addict is released to a HH house or back home,they need to know that rules are rules, laws are laws, like them or not, those are the boundary conditions of life in the US.

I hope I didn't offend. Just my two cents.

Best,

CIM
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Old 05-20-2007, 02:50 AM
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Just my thoughts. For those of you who have been scuba diving you went through training. Over a short period of time you found yourself in a swimming pool with your gear on ready to go under water and breath. I did this too when i got my license it was crazy. All I had to do was go underwater with my air line in my mouth and breath. I was in a safe, controlled enviroment (swimming pool) in 4 foot of water. I was doing fine until I tried to breath and my brain refused, "no way". My mind/body was programmed that breathing under the water was not normal. I sat there and pysched myself out in a few uncomfortable moments into breathing in and was soon after having a great time doing nothing on the bottom of a pool. My point is it is as much thier mind as it is thier body that rejects not having drugs. In my mind, no air, breathing underswater, im dead or i stand up. I did breath and taught my body you can breath again, even underwater with the right tools. Now for addicts, I think, its like myself being underwater, sorta. Addicts have been reprogrammed by drugs (proven by science) and what you see as life, is not what an A sees life as anymore. The drugs are esentially the equal to our air until they are retaught how to breath without them. This is simplistic but try holding your breath and you will see the results. One it is very uncomfortable but your body's self defense mechanism, pre programming, will not let you die. Your body makes you breath and I think it is similiar in the sense and addicts body and mind has been reprogramed and it will not let the addict do without what it thinks it needs, to survive. Addicts are a computer program totally run amok and they have to be reprogrammed and given the tools to breath without the drugs. Maybe the A is not ready to be reprogramed, to be redefined as who they know themselves to be now. Self preservation whether good or bad is programmed in the best of us and the worst of us.

Last edited by Noah812; 05-20-2007 at 03:09 AM.
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