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A Penny For Your Thought, Part 9

Old 05-17-2007, 07:29 PM
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Its okay Teke, I was just surprised noone said anything bout my baby drinking a whole bottle of Tylenol.
I truly dont want it to be all about me. I want it to be all about EVERYONES recovery
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Old 05-17-2007, 07:30 PM
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I understand you completely Cindi!

I'll be back in a few.. I need to eat.
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Old 05-17-2007, 07:34 PM
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Hows the cute little puppies Teke? I love 3 and 4 week olds
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Old 05-17-2007, 07:45 PM
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Originally Posted by cinderellawkids View Post
No its not all about me, Ive just had crises.




and some days you all choose to ignore what I say
omg, cindi, i thought it was you who said that about being all about them, but it was anvil, im sorry. i went back to read and saw that it was her. anyway, i was joking with anvil, didn't realize that it wasn't you

no go right ahead and lets work through all of your issues. i made a mistake and thought it was you who said that on the last page.


its ok if its all about you, no wonder anvil asked if we could talk about whatever, yes please, i get a lot out of what all of you are going through too.


gosh, i feel dumb
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Old 05-17-2007, 07:46 PM
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i need the skillet, yall
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Old 05-17-2007, 07:55 PM
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cinder, you have to tell me before you go that i'm ok, it has to be about you today, we need to get through some of all thats going on with ah and bil. not tell those hormones to settle down and keep posting, i'm still here for you. i had to do a little more cleaning but time for me to take another break, i can only do a little at a time, don't want my neck to start hurting.

now you know its all about all of us, we have to guide each other through this maze. ok
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Old 05-17-2007, 08:00 PM
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Dont Teke. I do think I said it one time.
My whole life Ive been accused over taking over and having more to say, so I try to watch it and not be so into me. I notice old bad mental habits creeping in this week.
Actually, Im dreading going to familys after sisters graduation, cause its not about me...
...maybe its just cause Im not happy and financially stessed right now? Ill get past it.

Doing more research on issues, and why we end up here. I think I like to be needed cause of abandonment issues and lack of emotional intamancy. (I do well as a rehab and prison wife) SO I have to work on those areas bout me. Today boys and I had a good talk. Middle son was crying and acting out, then he blurted out I miss daddy. Oldest said, well I hate him... then paused and said the bad him, kinda miss the good him. SO we talked honestly about our feelings and how gone is better than back and forth and not knowing what to expect. Middle son wants to visit him. I just said when he gets better.

I encouraged them both to talk to me when they had certain sad or angry feelings
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Old 05-17-2007, 08:09 PM
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Originally Posted by teke View Post
cinder, you have to tell me before you go that i'm ok, it has to be about you today, we need to get through some of all thats going on with ah and bil. not tell those hormones to settle down and keep posting, i'm still here for you. i had to do a little more cleaning but time for me to take another break, i can only do a little at a time, don't want my neck to start hurting.

now you know its all about all of us, we have to guide each other through this maze. ok
Your ok Teke, truly dont sweat it. Lets make a deal if any of us are out of line we tell each other. K. Deal and no one is out of line, not at all.
Nothing else going on with them. SIL decided after watching intervention taht something had to eb done, she thinks they cant find there way out at this time and AH is on top of everything else numbing pain of losing us. SO we are gonna attempt the court order adn this time tell the counselor the background issues with his brother dying and him blaming himself ect, and that he told me that now ten years later he still relives that night every day in his head.
The rest will be up to him/them. My last effort at pointing him in the right direction and then letting go.

Ill tell you if either surface anymore. Knowing the filth has me sick. Remembering him saying Id never be so stupid to let the power get shut off and then it happening is my drive as well.

Thats it. I have a headache and am really tired
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Old 05-17-2007, 08:11 PM
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i''m so sorry cinder, its bad enough that we have to hurt but the kids, thats so sad. seem like they would think at least about the kids but i guess its kind of hard to do when they are so caught up into drugs. they shouldn't have to go through this, but tell me what can we do but all we can to protect them. we can only do so much making up to the kids for them. its so sad, i know that feeling, my son acts out every now and again, he's older now though and i hope he understands a little better, but even my oldest son, was effected by my ah's actions, they used to be like best friends, and it like my son got traded for drugs, and i don't think he'll ever forget that.

he do understand addiction now though, he'll be 25 in two wks. they thought it was all my fault that ah wasn't home but as they got older they knew better about what was happening. i used to tell my kids the desease concept of addiction. they still refer it to being sick. i would pray for him together with them. i wished it was a better way
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Old 05-17-2007, 08:15 PM
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didn't you say that he don't have a phone? can you help them write him a letter, maybe just from them. will that work for the boys? or do you think not.
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Old 05-17-2007, 08:15 PM
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They dont truly think about themselves so of course they dont think of the kids. Its about burying the pain. The only way of coping they know
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Old 05-17-2007, 08:18 PM
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Originally Posted by teke View Post
didn't you say that he don't have a phone? can you help them write him a letter, maybe just from them. will that work for the boys? or do you think not.

I dont want to encourage him to come around. He likely got my letter about selling the house today, and then early next week they'll be served with petition papers. Dont want to tip the applecart to much
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Old 05-17-2007, 08:21 PM
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I do think Im going to, for me carefully write my letter about my pain and feelings to him, and only if he gets into inpatient treatment will I send it, that way he has the counselor to go over it with, if he chooses.

Also found out when he was there he was there 45 days, but its a 90 day program. They let him out early because he was in drug court with daily follow up counseling, which he did follow for 60 days until he and his bro took off. Maybe this time if he gets in, tehy'll keep him longer
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Old 05-17-2007, 08:36 PM
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hopefully this time he'll want to stay longer, i understand not wanting to tip the applecart too much, probably open up a whole new can of worms. i guess, its all up to him. still sad though that the kids have to go through this, but at least they have you there and you're doing a very good job.
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Old 05-17-2007, 08:43 PM
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i know that it may not make a difference but i want you to know that i did hurt because of what my kids were going through with me being active. i just didn't know how to stop but i never gave up trying to figure out how not to allow that urge to over take me. i remember not wanting my kids to see me like i was but i couldn't hurt them by not seeing them so maybe soon, he'll figure things out, i sure hope so anyway, and i do think that its good that you are doing what you gotta do about the house.

btw, i did forget to tell you how sorry that your son took the tylenot but also how glad i was to hear that he was ok, i kind of just forgot. i think that day, i was either away awhile or going through one of those days. anyway, i'm so happy that turned out well too
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Old 05-17-2007, 08:55 PM
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cindi
Thanks for taking the time to respond about the atropine, I know your going thru alot too ......so thanks

As for the treatment....I dont know how long he'll be there I hope a long time because he has really gotten bad, my "Functioning addict" is no longer functioning and I have great fear that he will die if he gets back out on the streets..........but I really am trying to turn it over you know.

Sorry I havent had the time to read many of the posts, and for some reason the web site is missing the new thread button today ..........which is why I posted under this thread...............

Also I wanted to ask you ......dont you live in florida? Well I found out that there is that marchmans act that you can go to probate court in your county and file seeking forsed treatment for your AH stating that hes to sick to make the decision for himself and I was told today that if you know where he is they will pick him up for treatment and you can go before the judge to keep having it continued............
Thats what I was on the way to do today when my AH called and said he wanted to go to treatment............

thanks again

Teke Thank you also for taking the time to reply.
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Old 05-17-2007, 09:01 PM
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not that it would be something that i could do for my ah, since he has such serious legal issues, but i wonder if there is something like that marchman act in ga. i think that i'd be too scared to do that, scared that i would be sentencing him to jail before he sentences himself if that what he chooses to do. how would i find out? and if so what would i have to do to get that started and who would have to file me or his mom, i'm sure she wouldn't be willing but just curious to know how that works
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Old 05-17-2007, 09:41 PM
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teke, here in Florida it is an act similar to the baker act ...its designed to help people who cant help themself because they are to sick. It is to keep them locked into treatment not jail..................to protect them from themself
I didnt know about the marchman act, I first read it on Crack reality board then the other day at the hospital where my husband was they told me again that it was something I could do. In florida it can be a family member.........wife mother sister whatever
I'm not sure about georgia try calling one of the detox units there and ask if theres anything you can do to have him put in treatment against his will
good luck
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Old 05-18-2007, 04:41 AM
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Lies again, Thats what all my postsThursday were about. We are marchman acting them. Actually I live in Daytona where the main Stewart Marchman facility is. He's been there before it was actually a good program just too short.

I didnt realize you were in Florida too where are you at?

Teke, if you contact your county probate court they can tell you if there is involuntary treatment plans. Most states I beleive there are, some are just trickier than others. Remember using in itself is a crime, a tually a felony. I know a guy who was found passed out in his car, nothing on him, they did a tox screen and was arrested for possession. Good news is after a year of rehab he's doing well and has custody of his daughter
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Old 05-18-2007, 05:17 AM
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Gotta big to do list today after work. Wanna finish all my weekend chores tonite so I an enjoy sis graduation and all
So Ive got to: clean all my tanks (turtle tank a big job) mop, clean the kitchen, laundry out the wazoo and I really should clean out my car. My goodness Im gonna be busy

Whats everyone elses plans or projects?
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