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If you've ever wondered why people hate your addict

Old 05-11-2007, 08:33 AM
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If you've ever wondered why people hate your addict

If you have ever wondered why the sober people in your life just "don't understand" why you keep supporting an addict,

Or why people can be so insensitive as to suggest that addicts be locked up and the key thrown away,

Or why your family sits on their high horse and looks sideways at you for allowing your addict to take care of your children,

...Google "Chandler Grafner" this morning and you will see why the world would just as soon incarcerate and sterilize addicts as anything else. Why they are sick of the tiny little recovery rate and all the damage that the other 99% do. Compassion for the poor, poor addict is fine; but who was there for Chandler?

I am one of those angry people you wonder about this morning, crying and furious, and I swear if one person in my life today says, "Oh, but it's just her DISEASE...you have to understand...." I'm going to punch his lights out.

For g*d's sake, he was only 7.
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Old 05-11-2007, 09:24 AM
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I understand your feeling on this.
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Old 05-11-2007, 09:27 AM
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Sad, and I believe this happens a lot although not all cases end in death. Marle
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Old 05-11-2007, 09:31 AM
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i too understand how you feel. still praying
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Old 05-11-2007, 10:18 AM
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And this is only one child that died...think of all the other children out there being neglected and abused due to their parents "problems" that the system is failing. May God be with them all..in so many cases, He's all they have.
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Old 05-11-2007, 10:48 AM
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horrible. he was an innocent child who was supposed to be taken care of and loved. Imagine all the cases that are discovered or reported? or hidden?
This makes me sick.
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Old 05-11-2007, 11:04 AM
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I just can't stop crying about this this morning, I'm sorry I came off so angry. Angry doesn't do anybody any good. But how do you do that to a kid? How do you STARVE a seven-year old to death? How can you even bring them into the world just to make them suffer like this? I know a woman who is trying to get pregnant again, she thinks that having another baby would bring her & her addict husband "closer again", and all this because he's been eight weeks sober, like a baby is some kind of reward for good behavior. Jeez i just can't stop crying. I'm supposed to be the strong one but this kid's just too close to home. This could so easily have been me.
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Old 05-11-2007, 11:26 AM
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Some of the articles I read on this sounded like child services may have dropped the ball as well.
Very very sad - absolutely devestating that someone so young could be treated so badly.
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Old 05-11-2007, 11:36 AM
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I know this is a LOT different, but I must say that for a few years I worked in animal rescue and people will allow their dogs, cats, horses, cattle.. die for lack of feed and water. they can abuse them horribly.

I often thought how impossible my battle was in view of the fact that some humans do the same thing to their children. Abuse to the point of death or permanent damage physically, emotionally and mentally. Neglect to the point of starvation. Neglect to the point of disease.

It makes me sick. It isn't just addicts who do this. Some addicts do this as do some non addicts.

There was an abuse case near here recently where CPS dropped the ball and a little girl was punished for something by having bleach poured in her eyes. It was touch and go as to whether she would ever see again. They saved her eyesight and still it was discussed to let her go back to her "family!"
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Old 05-11-2007, 11:40 AM
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social services is understaffed and under paid....there are so many cases you don't hear about in the news--thet system sucks--we have to change it....
I am a mandated reporter by law and only 2 times have I had to use it. Both times it was a huge disaster--they actually made things worse and did nothing to help.
I called DSS 5 times--then wrote the attny.general and gave him my licence number--I was willing to come forward even--no responce--and the abuse still continues////
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Old 05-11-2007, 01:24 PM
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I have to report abuse too. I did with my daughter's abf's daughters and nothing was done. They were living with their dad, a crack addict, and my daughter, an opiate addict while their mother was off with a new boyfriend. Mom knew her ex was addicted to crack and was more concerned with her love life than the lives of her children. Kids lived with him for almost a year. CPS totally dropped the ball on that one. But I did what I could. The mom is now living in the Keys with the new boyfriend and two of her daughters. The third is living with a sexually abusive step-dad. Mom does not have the money to buy a plane ticket and is letting the 14 year old daughter decide where she wants to live. The dad (my daughter's abf) does not see his daughters and spends money buying drugs that will kill my daughter rather than helping his own children. Very, very sad. Marle
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Old 05-11-2007, 02:26 PM
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(((givelove))) ...and thank you for your anger. It reminds me there is so much right with the world, as long as people still understand what is wrong...
Only a terrible disease — madness, addiction, alcoholism — could warp the most basic instincts for taking care of our little ones. I come from a family where there was alcoholism-related abuse/neglect; as you say, givelove, "This could so easily have been ~me..." Or any of us who grew up in that sick, sick environment.
Everytime I read or hear of a child wounded,I have to stop and start taking care of the little girl inside who still can't understand the harm done to her and the harm still being done to others. But I comfort myself by reminding myself that even the smallest kindnesses we offer to children can be remembered a long, long time....nothing is small to a child...& someone said, 'nothing we do for a child is ever wasted ~~ '
~~Nitelite
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Old 05-11-2007, 02:39 PM
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Here CPS hires people with little or know knowledge many run around with their head cut off and sadly addicts are manipulators they manipulate their children and the children tell storys. Too many times the wrong children are removed why the ones in danger are not
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Old 05-11-2007, 02:43 PM
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I take it the child didn't go to school....No nosy neighbors around....Family didn't stop by to see if the kids are okay amid her addiction....

I don't know...I don't get it.
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Old 05-11-2007, 06:46 PM
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It breaks my heart so much to see little children suffer. It has to be the most heartbreaking thing on earth.
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Old 05-11-2007, 07:35 PM
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I was just talking to my husband last night about the purpose on the earth of drug addicts. I told him that other than causing untold pain and misery I do not see a purpose. What other group of people cause the amount of pain and suffering that drug addicts do. When I read a story like this it makes me wonder even more. Marle
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Old 05-11-2007, 10:33 PM
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I also blame cops & the local government that lets these drug dealers continue. And in some cases, profit by letting drugs stay in their neighborhood. I've heard of more than one case where the cops or another "public" official is taking bribes or selling the drugs they confiscate for themselves. I remember when I was a teenager, there was NOT nearly the amount of drugs or addicts that there are 30 some years later. Seems that drugs are the answer to everyone's problem.

Lynne
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