at the garden shop

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Old 05-07-2007, 09:22 AM
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let it grow!
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at the garden shop

i was at my favorite garden shop yesterday morning, first time this year. it opens seasonally only, and the folks who work there every year have been there forever. i chat with them, and they give me advice and hold back interesting flowers/plants for me that they know i will appreciate. i'm "a regular"...

they asked me about my daughter, having no idea what had happened since last summer and my last visit.

i told them she is struggling with addiction issues. then i told them something i had never said out loud or for that matter - ever thought in such simple terms before - "she'll either get better or she'll get worse."

i think "around" that reality often, but first time it really really hit home.

i cried all the way home. all over my flat of geraniums...no watering needed.

thanks for listening, k
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Old 05-07-2007, 09:41 AM
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Originally Posted by parentrecovers View Post
i told them she is struggling with addiction issues. then i told them something i had never said out loud or for that matter - ever thought in such simple terms before - "she'll either get better or she'll get worse."
That sounds like some shining recovery to me.
to you.
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Old 05-07-2007, 09:46 AM
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parent,

Sounds like recovery to me too. Those geraniums will grow like crazy, I'm sure.

I will never forget the first time my mouth calmly jumped out there and said what my heart had always carefully hidden away: "The man I love is a drug addict, and won't get help. I don't think I want to have a life like that any more."

I'd NEVER allowed myself to think such thoughts, despite the fact that addiction was rampant in my family.

Love works in strange ways.
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Old 05-07-2007, 09:50 AM
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i think acceptance bring about healing, i'm praying for you and your daughter, i hope and pray that she finds her way soon.
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Old 05-07-2007, 12:01 PM
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If people ask me about my daughter, I am honest with them. I find almost everyone can relate as almost everyone has at least one addict in their life. Hugs to you, Marle
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Old 05-07-2007, 12:20 PM
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Sometimes we can "think" something for ages, but it takes actually saying it out loud for it to hit home....sorry it hit you while you were driving. That's a tough one.
But that was a big step in YOUR recovery saying that out loud and we are all soooo proud of you. Hope you are proud of yourself too....and feel a bit better after the waterworks :-)
And yes, they will be beautiful flowers!
**{hugs}}Barb
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Old 05-07-2007, 12:40 PM
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Sometimes knowing in our heart is different from intellectual knowledge. I am glad you have your strong recovery skills to help you through the process and acceptance. Mom to mom hugs and prayers for you and your daughter
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Old 05-07-2007, 12:47 PM
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It took me forever to say the word "addict"--it seems so much worse than alcoholic. Now, I can say it w/o the nausea and tears!
bless you!
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Old 05-07-2007, 01:33 PM
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I'm sorry...you are so strong to be able to tell the truth. Its horrible...
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Old 05-07-2007, 02:37 PM
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(((Parent)))
I'm not sure about you, but a good cry makes me feel so much better.
And from what I hear, it makes us look better too! (after we wipe off our faces...LOL)

You recovery is inspiring.


Thank you for sharing your story...

Hugs,
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Old 05-07-2007, 03:15 PM
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Hugs k
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Old 05-07-2007, 03:53 PM
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**{k}}
All that has been said...ditto,
and more hugs,
cmc
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Old 05-07-2007, 08:08 PM
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((((HUGS)))))stay strong!
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Old 05-08-2007, 04:23 AM
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(((Parent))) Yes saying it seems like the reality hits stronger than just thinking it. I am surprised that when I have said it out loud to people that don't know.."my daughter is an addict" That alot of people also have addicts in their life as well and understand. Keep your chin up, your doing very well in your recovery.
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Old 05-08-2007, 05:31 AM
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I haven't been able to say it out loud to anyone yet. When my family asked how the kids are, I just say fine. I talk about my 2 daughters, but just tell them my son is living away from home cause he has a job that is too far from us. I just can't bring myself to talk about it. I know once I talk to my sister about it, I'll cry and never stop. Just typing this message is making me sad. I think I keep hoping that he'll get better, and all will be well again, and no one would have to know. I know I'm kidding myself, but I just don't have it in me yet.

Good for you, you were able to get it out in the open. It does eat you up inside.
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