parentrecovers

went to a family session at my daughter's rehab on sat morn. sat in the front row. topic was codependency. bawled my eyes out pretty much the entire 2 hours. jeez. the facility she is in has a 10 day no contact rule - other than wkend visit hours. i did not go back on sunday to visit. i am appreciating no calls. it feels good to get a break, work on my own recovery.

i think i can find my place in this. god knows i've banged up against the wall enough times now? if it hurts when you go like that, don't go like that.

we had a bday party for my dad-in-law yesterday, and that kept me busy. i tried very hard to be "present" for that.

that one day at a time thing - so true.

blessings, k

marle

Yup, that is the only way to live. One day at a time. Looking too far ahead just keeps you in fear. One day is just right. We can do that much. Hugs to you, Marle

daisylady

Sometimes it is really nice to get a break from the chaos that an addict can create in your life and the bonus is, you know she is safe.

I think it is good that you let out your feelings at that meeting, sometimes is helps to cry and get it all out.

I pray that your daughter finds the help she needs.

hugs,
daisy

katie44

Nice break not dealing with the addict. Take time for yourself. Hugs to you and your daughter.

mooselips

parent,
For now one day at a time works for me too.....

teke

you sound good parent and i'm glad to hear that things are looking up for you and your daughter, i'm still praying for you and your daughter

greeteachday

(((((((Parents)))))))
Thinking of you and praying for you and your family.

hope213

((((parent)))) sometimes i have to take a break.it is one day at a time or i get overwhelmed. prayers, hope

MsPINKAcres

((parentrecovers))

Take good care of you,

Peace,
Rita

ChinUp

I know how you feel about getting a break ((((((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))

Cupicake

I am glad you were able to let your emotions loose. It's a good release. Those family sessions can be very emotional. Take this time to recoup and heal.

parentrecovers

we'll be meeting with her counselor for a family session on thursday. i found those really helpful last rehab stay. i'm staying hopeful. for all of us. k

Barbdee

Dear K,
Bet you felt better after that really good cry? Sometimes it needs to come out that way and I sincerely hope you were not embarrassed or anything....you are doing terrific.
I know that I bottled up all my emotions for so long that when I finally cried the first time, I couldn't stop. But it felt "cleansing"...almost as good as "venting" here :-)
So glad to hear you are taking time for you. I know that "no contact" rule is difficult, but since it's just another thing you can't control, it's great that you are using the time for YOU.
Sending some prayers and hugs...
Love, SM

BigSis

(((Parentrecovers))) I want to share my experience... not to bring you down, or to get you worried, but just because it feels right.

When our AD went to her second rehab, it started to feel "natural"... we had been there for two 2-day orientations, and one other 30-day inpatient... we had even been to the family week program once before... we thought we knew what to expect. So I went alone (Mr. Big had to wrok).

This time, though, was not exactly like the time before. Looking back, I can see that our family unit, just like the individuals in program, go through a process we sometimes call "peeling the onion".

We had worked through some really good stuff in the first family week, and I looked forward to a similarly "cathartic" experience this 2nd time... it just never worked out that way.

Daughter was far more angry, far more "real" and far more scared than the first time. She was facing some difficult realizations about her addiction and from OUR side, it looked like she was so much LESS willing to cooperate and get with the program!

She was resisiting. She was scared ... and that fear manifested itself in some pretty strong anger and rage... and I got VERY afraid while there. At one point, I made arrangements to take to her to a local Christian women's shelter in the heart of crack-city, Washington ... because she was very close to getting kicked out.

It turned out that she made it through the rehab... and went on to a recovery house. She learned a lot at that rehab...as did we. But it wasn't like the first time... and it wasn't easy.

I don't know what it will be like for you on Thursday, but I will keep you and yours in my prayers. (((Parentrecovers))))(((family))) HP will be with you... I guarantee it!

parentrecovers

yes, bigsis, i understand. thank you so much for sharing your experience. it already "feels' different. blessings, k

Sunflower

Yes YOU are changing---nothing wrong with a much needed break-at least you know where she is and she is safe--Crying? I think its good for the soul...and I have cried a river just like you!
(((HUGS)))

Wascally Wabbit

I have a son who is the addict in my life right now. I can certianly understand all the sorrow and pain that comes with it.
He had to move out about a month ago because I was about to lose my mind.
Now, I find that I deal better with him from a distance. Not in my house every day with fearing what's gonna happen next.
They really do have to find their own way and are remarkably resourceful at finding what they need.
Once you get a taste of peace in your home, you become reluctant to give it up.
I hope your daughter finds the recovery she needs, and I hope peace surrounds you this evening.